I just lost my husband ....I feel terrible :(

My loved husband just passed away October 26, 2009.It was a sudden death. The worse part is that he passed away inside my car, in the front passenger seat in the way to the hospital. It happened so quick, I can't believe it!
We were together for 10 years, and 7 1/2 years married. We were soulmates loved each other so much. I have a daughter who lives with us. She is so sad and depressed for the loss of her stepfather.
I feel numb, crying most of time. Everything looks gray to me....nothing looks or feel the same. Sometimes I feel so weak, that I think I will pass out. My daughter and God is keep me going. I have to be strong for me and my precious daughter. Part of me is gone with my loved husband John.
I trust God.......and I am sure that he will guide me. Sometimes I can't understand why it happened this way ......and so quick.
I just take day by day.....the only confort I have is that my husband is not suffering any pain anymore. He died from abdominal aneurism, he have being very sick since 2002. Complication from diabetes caused kidney failure, he was current on dialysis 3 times a week(for four hour) Blockage in both carotid, stroke, sepsis and more. He always bounced back fighting. But God called him this time. I can't even think clearly at this time. It is very hard my emotions like a rollercoaster.
He was 72 years old, and an Veteran.
God bless and take him in his arms. Rest in peace my honey;(

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Permalink Reply by linda woodbridge on November 21, 2009 at 8:31pm

HI THERE,

I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.I CAN SAY I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. EMPTY,LOST,ALONE,BEAT UP,ANGER,CHEATED.THIS IS HOW I FEEL TO. I HOPE AND PRAY FOR YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER TO FIND YOUR WAY. SLEEP IN THE SAME BED FOR COMFORT. GO FOR LUNCH IF YOU CAN. I TALK TO MY BOB ALL THE TIME. THE WAY YOUR HUSBAND PASSED AWAY WAS SO HARD FOR YOU TO DEAL WITH. GOSH THIS IS TOUGH HONEY. I AM SIXTY YEARS OLD. BOB WAS 65.I WILL PRAY FOR YOU AS WELL. E-MAIL ME IF YOU LIKE OK. MAY YOU FIND REAST SOON. LINDA

E-MAIL...winter60@tbaytel.net

Permalink Reply by Anita Simmons on November 21, 2009 at 10:28pm

Hi Linda, When did you loose your husband? What happened? I know my Malcolm died in a plane crash but I still don't know why it crashed. Our last conversation 1 hr before he seemed anxious about something and in such a hurry to get home to us. That all haunts me. It'll be 4 weeks Monday or 1 month on Thanksgiving. I attend church 1-2 times a week (the only place in viera that we never went to) to try to find answers and they're not coming. I pray all the time, walk with my dog and talk to Malcolm and read all his emails over and over. When does this get better? When will I feel like a person? I'm losing my home, our property that we just bought, all our dreams. I was just his fiance and that doesn't mean to anything to anyone.

I have no desire to live. Im not suicidal cause I want to see Malcolm again one day and I wont if I hurt myself. Where do I go now?

linda woodbridge said:

HI THERE,

I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.I CAN SAY I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. EMPTY,LOST,ALONE,BEAT UP,ANGER,CHEATED.THIS IS HOW I FEEL TO. I HOPE AND PRAY FOR YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER TO FIND YOUR WAY. SLEEP IN THE SAME BED FOR COMFORT. GO FOR LUNCH IF YOU CAN. I TALK TO MY BOB ALL THE TIME. THE WAY YOUR HUSBAND PASSED AWAY WAS SO HARD FOR YOU TO DEAL WITH. GOSH THIS IS TOUGH HONEY. I AM SIXTY YEARS OLD. BOB WAS 65.I WILL PRAY FOR YOU AS WELL. E-MAIL ME IF YOU LIKE OK. MAY YOU FIND REAST SOON. LINDA

E-MAIL...winter60@tbaytel.net

Permalink Reply by Missmylove47 on November 23, 2009 at 10:30pm

Hi Linda, How are you? Oh thanks so much for the nice reply. You sound a very nice sweet person Linda. Please check your comment page, I wrote you. I am so sorry for you loss. Like you I just lost my beloved husband John, less than a month ago October 26, 2009. I am 47 yrs old, and he just turned 72. I can't sleep in our bed yet, I don't know why.....I guess I am afraid to feel or see him, we were very close together...I just not ready yet. Yeah, the way he passed away was sudden,unexpected and traumatic, to me and my daughter. It keep playing over and over in my mind like a movie. At least my sweetheart is not suffering anymore. He was on so much pain, dialysis 3x times a week (for 4 hours each) diabetes, blockage in both carotid artery, aortic abdominal aneurysm, bypass heart surgery etc. More than enough isn't?
It brings me comfort, that he is in peace now. and lives in my heart and memories.
Since husband died I don't have any motivation for anything, but I try very hard pushing myself. I have a daughter, and 4 little miniature/toy white poodles that needs Mom. It is weird suddenly I have to become mother & father and everything is on my shoulder. Even if I am depressed I have to keep going, have faith in God. He knows my destiny, and yours too Linda. Your are in my thoughs and prayers be strong hang in there okay. God bless you! I will e-mail you to check how you are doing, and can reply to me if you like to okay.
Take care of yourself......talk to you soon!
Olivia
linda woodbridge said:

HI THERE,

I AM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.I CAN SAY I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. EMPTY,LOST,ALONE,BEAT UP,ANGER,CHEATED.THIS IS HOW I FEEL TO. I HOPE AND PRAY FOR YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER TO FIND YOUR WAY. SLEEP IN THE SAME BED FOR COMFORT. GO FOR LUNCH IF YOU CAN. I TALK TO MY BOB ALL THE TIME. THE WAY YOUR HUSBAND PASSED AWAY WAS SO HARD FOR YOU TO DEAL WITH. GOSH THIS IS TOUGH HONEY. I AM SIXTY YEARS OLD. BOB WAS 65.I WILL PRAY FOR YOU AS WELL. E-MAIL ME IF YOU LIKE OK. MAY YOU FIND REAST SOON. LINDA

E-MAIL...winter60@tbaytel.net

Permalink Reply by kerry on October 12, 2010 at 5:46pm

I lost my husband 12.08.10 I can,t believe how hard it is...........business debt..personel debt.....losing everything including the house....got children. really angry but have no time to mourn. i can't even buy his head stone. how can i remember where he is. no money, no life .....................no fff feeling, nothing x