Always on my mind

Reminders of our loved ones can be everywhere - in a song on the radio, a familiar scent, a special spot or a favorite food. What are the things that remind you of your loved one? Do you avoid them or seek them out?

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Permalink Reply by sue on May 3, 2009 at 8:46am

I loved this. suep

Permalink Reply by Debra on July 21, 2009 at 4:38pm

Between the guilt of my adultry and my husband's suicide, I have alot of pain, grief and anger and have been living with constant reminders . I have nightmares and if I watch a television show that has killings or guns . I live the moment of my husband's suicide all over again. Just the sounds or the sight of a gun makes me jump. I hate to see pictures, or his collections and even the song that we danced to on our wedding day 35 years ago. He has a massive collection of Nascar items and our car has Nascar decals and my house is a really big issue , especially since he took his life in our bedroom closet. So , reminders of pictures, or songs that are so close to your heart should be special but,for me they are nightmares and bad reminders. So, if you could see those special pictures and they can make you smile and remember the good times instead of bad nightmares than enjoy those and live the best of memories all over again.

Permalink Reply by stephanie slagle on July 28, 2009 at 4:30am

hi. my name is stephanie and i have lost a daughter and a husband in the past 4 yrs. i am 29 y.o. i have 2 happy and healthy children that are my sun! my daughter died of s.i.d.s. and my husband shot himself. i don't really know what grief is. i see a counselor on a monthly basis but i don't know what to do with the emotions in the mean time. i don't even know if this is right. it's been over a yr since my husband but i live in a small town and i am prime gossip. i know that god has a plan but they're everywhere. i hear the songs from our marriage, her birth and i can't do anything but pray. i was raised pentacostal but i haven't been to church since my husband died. he tried to shoot me first but the safety was on by the grace of god. it was a horrifying experience. i have no where to vent. i just...i really would like nothing more than to help someone with my experiences, but i don't know how to make sense of them some times. is there help?

Permalink Reply by stephanie slagle on July 28, 2009 at 4:33am

debra, i am so sorry for your experience and loss. i completely understand. god be with you and may he grant you peace.

Debra said:

Between the guilt of my adultry and my husband's suicide, I have alot of pain, grief and anger and have been living with constant reminders . I have nightmares and if I watch a television show that has killings or guns . I live the moment of my husband's suicide all over again. Just the sounds or the sight of a gun makes me jump. I hate to see pictures, or his collections and even the song that we danced to on our wedding day 35 years ago. He has a massive collection of Nascar items and our car has Nascar decals and my house is a really big issue , especially since he took his life in our bedroom closet. So , reminders of pictures, or songs that are so close to your heart should be special but,for me they are nightmares and bad reminders. So, if you could see those special pictures and they can make you smile and remember the good times instead of bad nightmares than enjoy those and live the best of memories all over again.

Permalink Reply by Debra on July 29, 2009 at 12:55am

Thank you Stephanie,
I am the one who is deeply sorry for your losses , I can't imagine such pain te>stephanie slagle said:

hi. my name is stephanie and i have lost a daughter and a husband in the past 4 yrs. i am 29 y.o. i have 2 happy and healthy children that are my sun! my daughter died of s.i.d.s. and my husband shot himself. i don't really know what grief is. i see a counselor on a monthly basis but i don't know what to do with the emotions in the mean time. i don't even know if this is right. it's been over a yr since my husband but i live in a small town and i am prime gossip. i know that god has a plan but they're everywhere. i hear the songs from our marriage, her birth and i can't do anything but pray. i was raised pentacostal but i haven't been to church since my husband died. he tried to shoot me first but the safety was on by the grace of god. it was a horrifying experience. i have no where to vent. i just...i really would like nothing more than to help someone with my experiences, but i don't know how to make sense of them some times. is there help?

Permalink Reply by Diamond on July 30, 2009 at 7:57pm

You are not alone - the only comfort that is long lasting is the comfort we receive from Almighty God when he promise he will allow the meek and righteous ones to inherit the earth - Psalms 37:9-11. Also, death will soon be a thing of the past - Revelation 21:3,4 - how beautiful life will be on earth in God's time when he rid the earth of those ruining the earth. So, put your faith in God - he does hear and see what is going on in your life. 1 John 3:16.

shirley wilson said:

hi my name is shirley wilson my son got kill on oct of 2008 was gun down by the police my heart is so broken i miss my son so much i can't sleep at night ,i cry all the time it hurt so bad on my mind all the time

Permalink Reply by Paulette on January 6, 2010 at 2:34pm

I go to the grocery store, my husband went everywhere with me,I find myself looking at the empty seat, and I talk to it like he,s sitting there. I'm eating supper by myself and I find myself telling what I'm making, andtelling him if he cooked it it would of been better. Now I find myself talking to his remains and telling everything I am doing.

Permalink Reply by YALONDA on January 7, 2010 at 9:33am

I just wanted to say I'm trulely sorry for the loss of your son. I've read many articles about people who have experienced such a loss and how they were able to cope with it. I see you've taken many pictures and found comfort in those. I would like to share with you what others have told me worked for them and that's looking forward to the many promises found in God's word the bible. One of these such promises is found at John 5:28, 29 where the bible tells of a time when those in the memorial tombs will hear Jesus' voice and come out. This scripture is talking about that resurrection hope spoken of many different times in the bible. Another scripture I'd like to share with you is found at Revelation 21:3,4, here we have the promises of tears and sorrow being done away with and all the things that bring us pain. I hope these thoughts and scriptures were a source of hope and encouragement to you...

Permalink Reply by Linda Norton on January 7, 2010 at 9:47am

I can no longer listen to certain songs or watch movies my son and I watched together.Joshua was 28 but a kid at heart.Never grew up.He worked hard with his dad painting houses.Joshua had some problems.We tried so hard to help him,but lost him.He is in heaven and I know he is at peace.I miss him so much.Our marriage is struggling to survive.I stay depressed alot.He was remembered at his funeral with always a smile and big heart.So many people loved him.I miss him.

Permalink Reply by Linda Norton on January 7, 2010 at 9:50am

YALONDA said:

I just wanted to say I'm trulely sorry for the loss of your son. I've read many articles about people who have experienced such a loss and how they were able to cope with it. I see you've taken many pictures and found comfort in those. I would like to share with you what others have told me worked for them and that's looking forward to the many promises found in God's word the bible. One of these such promises is found at John 5:28, 29 where the bible tells of a time when those in the memorial tombs will hear Jesus' voice and come out. This scripture is talking about that resurrection hope spoken of many different times in the bible. Another scripture I'd like to share with you is found at Revelation 21:3,4, here we have the promises of tears and sorrow being done away with and all the things that bring us pain. I hope these thoughts and scriptures were a source of hope and encouragement to you...

Permalink Reply by YALONDA on January 9, 2010 at 6:05am

Linda, I'm truley sorry that your in as much pain as you are. Loosing someone is such a hard and enexpected struggle. I can only imagine your pain, but please don't give up on your marriage or the many promises found in God's word the bible. Look forward to that hope of being reunited with Joshua. Remember that he is no longer suffering and that truley better times are ahead of us and the pain we feel now will be wiped away. I have information of other famalies that have experienced such a loss if your interested. Just let me know. I'm keeping you in my prayers.

Linda Norton said:

I can no longer listen to certain songs or watch movies my son and I watched together.Joshua was 28 but a kid at heart.Never grew up.He worked hard with his dad painting houses.Joshua had some problems.We tried so hard to help him,but lost him.He is in heaven and I know he is at peace.I miss him so much.Our marriage is struggling to survive.I stay depressed alot.He was remembered at his funeral with always a smile and big heart.So many people loved him.I miss him.

Permalink Reply by Susan W Reynolds on January 14, 2010 at 12:48pm

My philosophy is you avoid them , then remove them from your surroundings, donate them to someone who can use them or appreciate them in a good light or store them away. If they "pull" you backward, reassess their value to you at this time. Maybe tucking them a way for a while will create a benefit of space or even closure.

More ideas can be found @ www.revivalredesign.blogspot.com Under Room For Change. Email me any questions and stay connected. Susan