Missing Mom

Grief support for all who have lost moms

Losing your mother can be traumatic at any age. Share your grief and talk with others who are coping with the loss of their mothers.

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Permalink Reply by River of Tears on February 8, 2011 at 7:06am

Dear Jenny , Goodness , you say such kind things when it was I thinking about how you have given more to a shattered heart then you may even know , which I can imagine has reached so many . It is amazing in reading about your Mother and what others have shared as different we all may feel in life no matter what it would be , when it comes to love this is the one thing, feeling , fiber that ties some how together . As you said about your mother and how you feel , I too miss my Mother as though it was apart of each heart beat . At times I have mentioned since just recently my dear Sister passed away it feels as though my heart just stops . Both who where extremely close to me . We used to say we would never know what we would do with out one another , well .. I can not say that I am doing ,I just am . Just go from day to day . Even when out shopping I am catching myself seeing something that I knew my Mother may need or would like to try , things that she herself may not have been able to get or never willing unless my Sister and I would send it too her . Unless one of us tried it first, guess who tried everything first in my family , ( some what the Mikey will try everything ). No loss for at least we had another chance to call her to ask her if she liked it ok not , and if she did not respond we had our answer .

As you have shared it does seem inhumanly impossible in what many have to do in grief , this is one thing I still am not sure how or if ever anyone will know how it is able to be done . For as I stated I just function , not sure if that is quite living per say , though it pays the bills. If not or a place like this to come I am not sure where I would be at today, for it is you Jenny and the many others . Thank goodness I keep a box of kleexex close by , so in just thinking of all you and your journey it is there and ready . Ok, glasses fogging up .

Please take care , may comfort come to in special ways . Memories seem to help don't they .

Jenny said:

River of Tears...You have a beautiful way of expressing yourself and I'm truly blessed that I gave you comfort whenI thought people might think.."this girls not right"..lol..I am sincerely touched and thankyou for your kind,heart-warming words. You made my day. Funny how how we can all post our similiar stories and learn tid bits from each person...and comfort each other without realizing. I miss my mom and think about her 24/7.. My toughest time STILL, is waking first thing in the morning, and still not fully awake, realizing....oh ya...my mom is gone...How did I ever make it?? It was my worst fear what I would ever do w/o her. That's the grace of God pushing me, as there is no humanly way, I could live w/o her. Oh..here I go babbling. Thank you for your support as well, and yes, I believe everything happens for a reason. This is no exception. =).Keep in touch and God Bless those River of Tears!

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by Jenny on February 8, 2011 at 10:08pm

River of Tears..You did it to me again.. Yes, I have a box of tissues as well. Just wanted to say "AMEN"..to your response. I do everything you find yourself doing. You, my friend, gave me strength this time as I am so sorry to hear you lost your sister as well...WOW..Double wammy,I don't know what I would do. I don't have a sister,but since my mom passed(I have a brother who is wonderful..just guys are different) I thought that if I just had a sister this would be sooo much easier...guess I need to think again...We all have our crosses to bear,however,you,River.. are top priority in my prayers tonight. God Bless..

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by s l watson on February 8, 2011 at 11:15pm

River, I'm so sorry you have lost your sister. Losing a mother is bad enough but a sister too! Sometimes we feel we are burdened with more than we can bear. I would be lost without mine She has been my strength through Mama's illness and death. I found a quote recently that I hold dear. It is, "Sweet is the voice of a sister in the season of sorrow." So true. I hope you have other siblings or friends you can lean on. If not...we're here for you. Jenny, love your brother. I have only the one sister but always wanted a brother. You gals keep up the good fight.
Jenny said:

River of Tears..You did it to me again.. Yes, I have a box of tissues as well. Just wanted to say "AMEN"..to your response. I do everything you find yourself doing. You, my friend, gave me strength this time as I am so sorry to hear you lost your sister as well...WOW..Double wammy,I don't know what I would do. I don't have a sister,but since my mom passed(I have a brother who is wonderful..just guys are different) I thought that if I just had a sister this would be sooo much easier...guess I need to think again...We all have our crosses to bear,however,you,River.. are top priority in my prayers tonight. God Bless..

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by River of Tears on February 9, 2011 at 4:29am

Dear Jenny, You my friend from afar have truly touched this broken heart , one that seems to be shattered into pieces but yet has the uncanny ability to beat . Maybe it is from the strength I have received from you and the others here that has kept it going . I can imagine you are doing this for your Brother also , even if he is unable to share or a word is not said . Isn't it amazing "time" , this four letter word we grow up taking for granted thinking it will be there all the time to share with the ones you love . Even if it is that we still lived by an alarm or schedule or time clock , times effect on love was that you were able to be with and albe to give to those you love that much more . Yet with someone passing the "time " you thought you once had is not ever to be had again . Still living by an alarm clock (if not to toss it to the other side of the room the days.) as a reminder that your Mother is not here to call as you used to do . Yet another yet more powerful 4 letter word will always hold true that is

L O V E , one that time now can not change ,, one that I know I will have in my heart forever . Something that may feel that can not be taken away in all of this . This is the Love she gave and the love I hold true for her as I alway will as I will for my Sister and Father .

My Mother was more then one that gave me birth for I truly believe it is it was more then this that makes one a Mother . It was beyond what was said and done though so much was given , it was something deep inside I just felt that some how I was blessed in life . Her love transcended beyond what she gave to me but to everything she did and to everyone around her .

Take care Jenny and to all comfort to you .

"T I M E" if only we could buy more of it, like the magazine on the shelf .

Jenny said:

River of Tears..You did it to me again.. Yes, I have a box of tissues as well. Just wanted to say "AMEN"..to your response. I do everything you find yourself doing. You, my friend, gave me strength this time as I am so sorry to hear you lost your sister as well...WOW..Double wammy,I don't know what I would do. I don't have a sister,but since my mom passed(I have a brother who is wonderful..just guys are different) I thought that if I just had a sister this would be sooo much easier...guess I need to think again...We all have our crosses to bear,however,you,River.. are top priority in my prayers tonight. God Bless..

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by River of Tears on February 9, 2011 at 5:14am

Dear s/watson , It is amazing that those who are in such pain have this ability to give to comfort to others thank you . When I first came to this site I saw your Mothers pictures and was so touched one that you had that to share , but also each time I look at the photo that speaks volumes of your love for her . If only so many knew that there isn't a secret to this feeling called love , all you have to do is look at the one before you . Your quote brought me to tears , for I have been so wanted to hear my Sisters gentle voice again . Both my Mother and Sister had a way of speaking that was at times if closing your eyes some would say that they could not tell who it was . For me they never had to really say a word , it was just that feeling you have with someone . At a young age of course ,you knew exactly what Mom was thinking just by her look or by the cadence of her walk down the hall . ( Not that she had to very often ). Which then she thought if she took off her shoes, I would not know she was coming well like I said for me it was always just a feeling with them . We laughed about that in later life , even though she still tried to see if it were true , something about the connection I had with her and my Sister and Father may sound uncanny and not one I could not even explain . I just think it was the deep love we had for one an other. Always connecting no matter if we were in the same room or across the country . Now I find it so difficult to know how to connect with them when they are now in Heaven . I have found surprisingly that in coming here that in a sense you and all that have share and brought words of comfort, even in such pain and sorrow , you have been a gift ,one of the gifts in life that many miss or do not have , the gift of others . There is nothing like a Sister who may also be your best as I was blessed to have , your sister is truly fortunate to have you .

May the comfort you bring to others , also be brought to you . take care ..

To everyone may comfort come to you in ways you may not expect as it has happened for me .

s l watson said:

River, I'm so sorry you have lost your sister. Losing a mother is bad enough but a sister too! Sometimes we feel we are burdened with more than we can bear. I would be lost without mine She has been my strength through Mama's illness and death. I found a quote recently that I hold dear. It is, "Sweet is the voice of a sister in the season of sorrow." So true. I hope you have other siblings or friends you can lean on. If not...we're here for you. Jenny, love your brother. I have only the one sister but always wanted a brother. You gals keep up the good fight.
Jenny said:
River of Tears..You did it to me again.. Yes, I have a box of tissues as well. Just wanted to say "AMEN"..to your response. I do everything you find yourself doing. You, my friend, gave me strength this time as I am so sorry to hear you lost your sister as well...WOW..Double wammy,I don't know what I would do. I don't have a sister,but since my mom passed(I have a brother who is wonderful..just guys are different) I thought that if I just had a sister this would be sooo much easier...guess I need to think again...We all have our crosses to bear,however,you,River.. are top priority in my prayers tonight. God Bless..

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by Jenny on February 10, 2011 at 12:02pm

AMEN!!!!!..God Bless you River. You too, have helped piece together this shattered heart of mine. Thank you and everyone else who have shared their grief. I can relate to you all. Keep writing please..You may not realize just how much your words helped me,and I'm imaging many others..!

Jennifer

River of Tears said:

Dear Jenny,   You my friend from afar have truly touched this broken heart , one that seems to be shattered into pieces but yet has the uncanny ability to beat . Maybe it is from the strength I have received from you and the others here that has kept it going . I can imagine you are doing this for your Brother also , even if he is unable to share or a word is not said .     Isn't it amazing "time" , this four letter word we grow up taking for granted thinking it will be there all the time to share with the ones you love . Even if it is that we still lived by an alarm or schedule or time clock , times effect on love was that you were able to be with and albe to give to those you love that much more . Yet with someone passing the "time " you thought you once had is not ever to be had again . Still living by an alarm clock (if not to toss it to the other side of the room the days.) as a reminder that your Mother is not here to call as you used to do . Yet another yet more powerful 4 letter word will always hold true that is

L O V E , one that time now can not change ,, one that I know I will have in my heart forever .  Something that may feel that can not be taken away in all of this . This is the Love she gave and the love I hold true for her as I alway will as I will for my Sister and Father .

  My Mother was more then one that gave me birth for I truly believe it is it was more then this that makes one a Mother . It was beyond what was said and done though so much was given , it was something deep inside I just felt that some how I was blessed in life . Her love transcended beyond what she gave to me but to everything she did and to everyone around her .

Take care Jenny and to all comfort to you .

"T I M E" if only we could buy more of it, like the magazine on the shelf .

Jenny said:

River of Tears..You did it to me again.. Yes, I have a box of tissues as well. Just wanted to say "AMEN"..to your response. I do everything you find yourself doing. You, my friend, gave me strength this time as I am so sorry to hear you lost your sister as well...WOW..Double wammy,I don't know what I would do. I don't have a sister,but since my mom passed(I have a brother who is wonderful..just guys are different) I thought that if I just had a sister this would be sooo much easier...guess I need to think again...We all have our crosses to bear,however,you,River.. are top priority in my prayers tonight. God Bless..

Jennifer

Permalink Reply by Jenny Charlene Autzen on February 10, 2011 at 7:55pm

thank you everyone for sharing your grief with me,i just lost my mom jan23rd,she was murdered so it was not expected what so ever you all will be in my thoughts and prayers i miss my mom so so much i dont know if this aching pain inside will ever go away reading your story and comments has helped thanks again.jenny

Permalink Reply by Jenny Charlene Autzen on February 10, 2011 at 7:55pm

Jenny Charlene Autzen said:

thank you everyone for sharing your grief with me,i just lost my mom jan23rd,she was murdered so it was not expected what so ever you all will be in my thoughts and prayers i miss my mom so so much i dont know if this aching pain inside will ever go away reading your story and comments has helped thanks again.jenny

Permalink Reply by River of Tears on February 11, 2011 at 4:28am

Dear Jenny Chalene Autzen, Please know you are in my thoughts and in my prayers . I am truly sorry for what only I can imagine you are going through and what your Mother must have too . Please take

The gift we all seem to know "was and is this wonderful gift of Love " .

This can not be taken away no matter how .

May comfort come to all of you ..

Jenny Charlene Austen said:

thank you everyone for sharing your grief with me,i just lost my mom canard,she was murdered so it was not expected what so ever you all will be in my thoughts and prayers i miss my mom so so much i dint know if this aching pain inside will ever go away reading your story and comments has helped thanks again.jenny

Permalink Reply by Linda on February 11, 2011 at 8:03am

Jenny..I am so sorry about your mom..There really are no words. My mom went unexpectedly also but I was just 10 yrs old then..I know your pain but can only imagine how deep yours runs. I still miss her every day, at times thinking about all the things you want your mom there for and she wasn't and yes I will still cry, wishing she was here and it will be 44 yrs on Feb 20th. The pain is there but its more of a dull pain, (once in a while a sharp jab), probably because I did not get the chance to have my mother for that long. Keeping you in my thoughts..Linda, Jennifer's mom

Permalink Reply by white dove on February 11, 2011 at 8:50am

My Heart goes out to all here who have lost "our" moms.. Tomorrow would be my mom's 89th Birthday! I can hear her saying "Wow, that's old" lol. It is coming on 2 years soon that we have lost her.. and still.... we are trying to piece ourselves back together. Someone once told me: Life brings changes and we must change with them". To be who we once were, seems impossible without our moms always being here for us* I would like to say: Happy Birthday Mom.. i pray you are flying on Angel wings to places that you were unable to see during your lifetime here. Love, and miss you terribly.. untill we see you again MaMa xoxoxox's and butterfly kisses*

Linda said:

Jenny..I am so sorry about your mom..There really are no words. My mom went unexpectedly also but I was just 10 yrs old then..I know your pain but can only imagine how deep yours runs. I still miss her every day, at times thinking about all the things you want your mom there for and she wasn't and yes I will still cry, wishing she was here and it will be 44 yrs on Feb 20th. The pain is there but its more of a dull pain, (once in a while a sharp jab), probably because I did not get the chance to have my mother for that long. Keeping you in my thoughts..Linda, Jennifer's mom

Permalink Reply by Diamond on February 11, 2011 at 8:07pm

Jenny - our parents are with us forever in our hearts - they are always there. We can always think of the happy time and treasure them.

Linda said:

Jenny..I am so sorry about your mom..There really are no words. My mom went unexpectedly also but I was just 10 yrs old then..I know your pain but can only imagine how deep yours runs. I still miss her every day, at times thinking about all the things you want your mom there for and she wasn't and yes I will still cry, wishing she was here and it will be 44 yrs on Feb 20th. The pain is there but its more of a dull pain, (once in a while a sharp jab), probably because I did not get the chance to have my mother for that long. Keeping you in my thoughts..Linda, Jennifer's mom