My uncle that I was extremely close to committed suicide when I was 15. All I remember is my mom telling me what happened and then me being in my room rocking myself back and forth. For a while I thought that I had fully grieved but now, at 18, it almost seems like it's getting harder to deal with. I don't know if maybe at 15 I wasn't fully ready to handle such a trauma or maybe now I'm just realizing all of the things he missed out on like teaching me to drive, the prom, graduation. It's really hard for me to talk about it with most of my family and friends. It's like I almost feel as though I should be over it, or at least not be this sad still.

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I am very sorry for your loss of your uncle. My daughter was your age now when she lost hers. My brother was a huge part of her life also. We are talkers in my family and we still talk alot about my brother....he died 7 years ago. I am glad you have found this site. You can talk here about your uncle if your family is uncomfortable about it. Or perhaps your school councellor or some other professional. Your uncle meant alot to you, there is no hard and fast rule about grieving, you are a little older now and you will not always be this sad, some days you may find harder than others, but you will move forward. Your uncle lost his battle with depression, he was not himself when this happened, may you begin to remember some good stuff about him and not let the "suicide" part of it overshadow all of that. I am sorry for your loss of him.
Sue

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