I lost my younger brother 4 weeks ago

Hello, I am new to this site. My name is Jamie. My younger brother, Chad, died 4 weeks ago, the day after his 34th birthday, due to a tragic accident. I don't want to go into details, as it is too hard for me, but he took his own life. We are only a 1.5 years apart in age. He lived with me, and leaves behind 6 beautiful children under the ages of 11 years old :( My family and I are just devasted, never would we have thought we would be dealing with losing our Chad. I am so lost and lonely, it has been a nightmare.

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Permalink Reply by Jen don on December 15, 2014 at 8:12pm

Jamie, I am so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain you are feeling. I have recently joined a grief group which has helped me a lot. I lost my younger sister in May and it helps to have a safe place to talk about your loved one where people really understand your pain. If you google grief groups you will find one in your area. My best to you.
Jen

Permalink Reply by Lori k on December 15, 2014 at 9:24pm

I am so so sorry Jamie. Four weeks is still a very fragile time. I understand as my sis took her life in October and I truly know the anguish you are going through. Let it out and mourn, its an unfortunate thing that you have to navigate through. Keep writing to us on here. I am new to this, as well, but have found some comfort sharing with others who are experiencing similar feelings. People who arent in it don't know how to react as they have no frame of reference. Peace write anytime. Bless you and your family.

Permalink Reply by Leah roses on January 26, 2015 at 11:03am

Hello Jamie

I loss my brother some years ago and it still feels like I lost him yesterday.
When we lose someone we loved dearly. It feels like nothing will take away the pain. What help me to cope was family and friends also the good memories I had of my brother. One year I decided to look to God for answers. These were the questions I asked my self as I was looking in his word the bible. Does God really care about us? Is there any hope for the dead? These questions were answered in 1Peter 5:6,7 and Acts 24:15. When I found these scriptures it all make sense to me that God does care about us and our loved ones who had falling in sleep. I encourage you to read God word because he cares for you and your loved will never be forgotten by him.

Permalink Reply by Jamie Ann on February 9, 2015 at 8:44pm

Well it has been 9 months since my younger brother died. Still seems like yesterday, I can remember every detail of seeing him last when my older brother and I viewed him at the funeral home. I found out about 3 weeks after he passed away that my husband and I were expecting a 4th child. I tell you this, it has been the hardest 9 months of my life. This baby I am carrying, and who is due to arrive next Friday, must be a fighter because I really don't know how we both made it. I still post on my brother's facebook page, I know he will never be able to reply, but I guess it is my only outlet to communicate with him. I miss him so much, I don't think there has been a day in the past 9 months that I have not cried. I cant look at his pictures without just breaking down in sobs. My brother has 6 kids all under the age of 11 years old. I am in 3 of their lives, and his son who is 10 looks just like him. It is very emotional, me being able to be with them and my brother cant. Just so wrong.

Permalink Reply by Karen Liller on February 11, 2015 at 2:53pm

Hi Jamie-

I read your post and want you to know you are not alone. I lost my sister Lisa 15 months ago and the pain is still very raw. I read how you post on your bother's Face Book page. I write to my sister everyday still and tell her everything that is going on-so do not feel bad about posting. Lisa's sons (now 25 and 20) are dating and her older son is getting serious with a wonderful girl. I so wish Lisa were here to see this-she would be very proud. He is in PA school and doing very well. My sister-in-law told my Mom and me at Lisa's memorial service that we should create a hope chest of sorts of some of her things, pictures, things she liked to do, etc to give to her sons so they could share with their families so she is never forgotten. Lisa fought so hard to be here. I believe though she is very much aware of our lives in heaven and we will see her again someday.

Take care and best of luck with the new baby-rejoice in his/her birth.

Best,

Karen

Permalink Reply by Jamie Ann on February 13, 2015 at 2:00pm

Hi Karen, thank you for the reply. It is very difficult. I hate everything about it. The timing of my pregnancy was so weird, just weeks after my brother died, and I am even being induced to have my baby on one of his daughters birthdays. So I think that is possibly a sign that my brother is with me always and has been. I just don't know when the hurt will get easier, it is just not fair. I am so sorry to hear about your sister. Losing a sibling is just so painful and cruel.

Permalink Reply by Amber Jacobs on March 3, 2016 at 7:55pm

I know this is been some time ago my brother took his life I've had 21 years old May 20th 2012 by far the hardest day of my life it is been a long journey trying to wrap our heads around it. We have a long way to go with the healing process. Hugs to you and your family

Permalink Reply by peter tyndall on June 16, 2016 at 7:49pm

i am so sorry jamie,i lost a good mate to suicide 6 years ago,its devastating is,nt it because there never seems to be any warning signs,if you need anyone to talk to i,m here ok,

Permalink Reply by Karen Liller on June 17, 2016 at 7:54am

I hope things are well with you Jamie. I have not written to the site in a while but saw someone responded to your text and was thinking of you and all the folks on the site. It is now about 3.5 years since I lost my beautiful little sister Lisa. I miss her deeply every day.

Permalink Reply by elyse on June 21, 2016 at 9:14am

Jamie,I am sorry to hear of your loss.Stay close to your brother's children,they are a connection to him.I hope you have a support system to help you through.Going back years,who would ever think your sibling would be gone.I look through family pictures
years before growing up and thinking now How could this happen ? Why did this happen? So many unanswered questions sill linger in my mind and I'm afraid will always be.My only sibling /brother drowned 5/28/14.Undetermined is what it says.He was alone walking along a trail.What happened after that remains a mystery.As far as my support system,I go to a bereavement group and this site.Hugs to you,Elyse

Permalink Reply by Mark Anderson on June 29, 2016 at 10:42am

Jamie,

So sorry to hear about your loss. I also lost a sister from suicide. The loss of a loved on is always difficult but I think suicide adds another whole dimension of shock, why questions, guilt, depression and every other emotion. Be good to yourself, use your support system and try not to let the "why" overwhelm you.

Take Care!!

Mark A

Permalink Reply by Ewa Toole on October 14, 2016 at 6:37pm

I can relate, my younger brother aged, 41 died of acute lung infection late August this year. He thought he had flu. I agree with you my life is now out of control. I find people avoid me because they don't know what to say, that makes things worse. I am trying to support my devastated parents as best I can as well as my sister. I live approximately 1 1/2 from them. Really its been a blur. I contacted you because you will understand.