Missing Mom

Grief support for all who have lost moms

Losing your mother can be traumatic at any age. Share your grief and talk with others who are coping with the loss of their mothers.

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Permalink Reply by JAYLEEN on August 7, 2009 at 3:01pm

IM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSE DIAMOND, I LOST MY MOM TEN WEEKS AGO AND I TOO AM SEVERLY DEPRESSED. SEEMS LIKE A BIG PART OF ME DIED WITH MY MOM. LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. BLESS YOU AND MY SYMPATHIES ARE WITH YOU.

Ann said:

Thank you. What you wrote is exactly what my mother would say. She was very devoted to the Lord. She wasn't able to go to chuch for a long time, but we prayed together at home. I am glad her pain is over.

Diamond said:
You are not along - God's knows your pain. It will get better if you realize that your love one is not in pain and that there is a hope for all of us who dies in this system. Your love ones have a hope of being resurrected. Please read - Revelation 21:3,4 and Eccl. 9:5, Psalms 37: 9-11. Comfort should come from knowing that they are not suffering anymore - this system of things brings so much pain and often leaves one feeling empty.

Your tears are heard by God and it is not going un-noticed. Pray to God, really pray to him and ask for the directions you should take in order to move forward with your life. Make God your friend as he will NEVER leave you or DISAPPOINT hyou. Imperfect man could never measure up to the friendship you can have with our God. I hope this helps.......

Ann said:
I lost mt mom 9 weeks ago. I can't stop crying. I have no one to help me. When will it get "better"?

Permalink Reply by Steven and Lydia Glucksberg on August 7, 2009 at 11:59pm

JAYLEEN said:

IM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSE DIAMOND, I LOST MY MOM TEN WEEKS AGO AND I TOO AM SEVERLY DEPRESSED. SEEMS LIKE A BIG PART OF ME DIED WITH MY MOM. LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. BLESS YOU AND MY SYMPATHIES ARE WITH YOU.

Ann said:
Thank you. What you wrote is exactly what my mother would say. She was very devoted to the Lord. She wasn't able to go to chuch for a long time, but we prayed together at home. I am glad her pain is over.

Diamond said:
You are not along - God's knows your pain. It will get better if you realize that your love one is not in pain and that there is a hope for all of us who dies in this system. Your love ones have a hope of being resurrected. Please read - Revelation 21:3,4 and Eccl. 9:5, Psalms 37: 9-11. Comfort should come from knowing that they are not suffering anymore - this system of things brings so much pain and often leaves one feeling empty.

Your tears are heard by God and it is not going un-noticed. Pray to God, really pray to him and ask for the directions you should take in order to move forward with your life. Make God your friend as he will NEVER leave you or DISAPPOINT hyou. Imperfect man could never measure up to the friendship you can have with our God. I hope this helps.......

Ann said:
I lost mt mom 9 weeks ago. I can't stop crying. I have no one to help me. When will it get "better"?

Permalink Reply by Steven and Lydia Glucksberg on August 8, 2009 at 12:00am

Steven and Lydia Glucksberg said:

JAYLEEN said:
IM SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSE DIAMOND, I LOST MY MOM TEN WEEKS AGO AND I TOO AM SEVERLY DEPRESSED. SEEMS LIKE A BIG PART OF ME DIED WITH MY MOM. LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. BLESS YOU AND MY SYMPATHIES ARE WITH YOU.

Ann said:
Thank you. What you wrote is exactly what my mother would say. She was very devoted to the Lord. She wasn't able to go to chuch for a long time, but we prayed together at home. I am glad her pain is over.

Diamond said:
You are not along - God's knows your pain. It will get better if you realize that your love one is not in pain and that there is a hope for all of us who dies in this system. Your love ones have a hope of being resurrected. Please read - Revelation 21:3,4 and Eccl. 9:5, Psalms 37: 9-11. Comfort should come from knowing that they are not suffering anymore - this system of things brings so much pain and often leaves one feeling empty.

Your tears are heard by God and it is not going un-noticed. Pray to God, really pray to him and ask for the directions you should take in order to move forward with your life. Make God your friend as he will NEVER leave you or DISAPPOINT hyou. Imperfect man could never measure up to the friendship you can have with our God. I hope this helps.......

Ann said:
I lost mt mom 9 weeks ago. I can't stop crying. I have no one to help me. When will it get "better"?
IT WILL GET BETTER GIVE YOURSELF THE TIME TO GRIEVE IT TOOK ME ALMOST 2YEARS BUT AS TIME GOES ON YOU WILL GATHER THE GOOD THINGS YOU REMEMBER AND HOLD THEM CLOSE AND G-D WIL HELP YOU AND SHE NEVER REALLY LEFT YOU SHE WILL ALWAYS BE IN YOUR HEART AND MEMORY MAY YOU COME TO FIND THE PEACE AND LOVE SHE GAVE YOU AND STILLDOES SO CRY BECAUSE IT HURTS BUT THE CRYING WILL STOP AND YOU WILL BE OK IKNOW BECAUSE I STILLLOVE MY MOM AND MISS HER EVERYDAY AND I KNOW SOME DAY WE WILL BE TOGETHER AGAIN BUT UNTIL THEN SHE IS ALWAYS WITH YOU

Permalink Reply by Steven and Lydia Glucksberg on August 8, 2009 at 12:02am

Mia Vanetek said:

Hi. My mother was 86 when she passed away on May 5th. Although for many years she fought illnesses such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and Lymphoma she ended up having a terrible fall and succumbed to a TBI-traumatic brain injury on april 22nd, then passed on May 5th. Not only am I going through this, but I am in the process of moving from L.A. to Texas! Everything at once. I don't know what's better. I am also arguing with my older brother and sister about all of the stuff in my mom and dad's house. Who gets what? It is aggravating, I have lost many hours of sleep over it. Any suggestions on how to cope? I greatly appreciate it and my heart goes out to others who are in the same situation.

Permalink Reply by white dove on August 8, 2009 at 10:34am

Hi, I'm not sure if this reply goes to Mia or steven and Lydia? But, i would like to say i am having sibling problems after my mom passed. The pain and anguish and anxiety is so strong while our beloveds are ill, that sometimes things are said, that maybe shouldnt have. There is a definate seperation now between my sister and i. Extreme differences of opinions during my moms life and care. Today, i have to say is a bad day for both my daughter and myself. After losing my mom and daughters gramma, we have gone into grievence counseling, which has been a great help! But... we started a phase of running away from home. Everyday, we find things to do but come home. Its raining here today and we are having to stay in! ALL memories are catching up to us. Guilt, sorrow, i could go on. Anyone else feel this way? I wonder when am i going to stop running away? VEry hard also, because we moved my mom into an apartment last year right behind ours in the same building so we could help more often. We see her apartment daily..... very very hard.............. I swear i can still see her peeking out her blinds waving to me and watching over me...... when will this pain stop?

Steven and Lydia Glucksberg said:

Mia Vanetek said:
Hi. My mother was 86 when she passed away on May 5th. Although for many years she fought illnesses such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and Lymphoma she ended up having a terrible fall and succumbed to a TBI-traumatic brain injury on april 22nd, then passed on May 5th. Not only am I going through this, but I am in the process of moving from L.A. to Texas! Everything at once. I don't know what's better. I am also arguing with my older brother and sister about all of the stuff in my mom and dad's house. Who gets what? It is aggravating, I have lost many hours of sleep over it. Any suggestions on how to cope? I greatly appreciate it and my heart goes out to others who are in the same situation.

Permalink Reply by Laurenelyse on August 8, 2009 at 9:22pm

My Mother passed away on June 11th,2009. I am new to this group. One that none of us wants to belong. My Mom was my best friend. We were only 20 years apart in age. She married my Dad at 18,he was 20. (they were childhood sweethearts). They were married for over 35 years. Mom's life revolved around her family. She had her Grandchildren with her everyday. She was 63 when she passed away from Liver Cancer. I was lucky enough to have her in our home her last 4 weeks. Although Hospice checked in on her once a day,Myself,My Husband, My Sister,and 2 Aunts took care of her around the clock needs. I'm so thankful we were able to give her that. That's how she wanted to go. Now I'm dealing with trying to pick up the pieces. She was such a huge part in our every day lives that I'm just lost. People will tell me"It gets better in time" I don't know how that could be. When I think of not seeing her or hearing her voice for 20,30,+ years. I cannot comprehend it at all! If anyone has advice on how they dealt with their loss I would appreciate your sharing it. Thank you. Laurenelyse

Permalink Reply by white dove on August 8, 2009 at 10:10pm

hi, i was just reading articles on grief, they help in a way of understanding what we are feeling and that we are not crazy.... even tho we feel this way. My mom passed a little over 4 months ago. My daughter and i and a little bit of help from my sister... pitched in to take care of my mom on home hospice. I was her primary, she came to call me "MaMa". I slept next to her hospital bed on the floor with my arm propped up to hold her hand. There are SO MANY other things... too much to write. We are blessed for being with our loved one at this time, but i also feel doomed. For lack of help, i over stressed. some days looking like i was the one leaving. Being told "you look like hell". My reply? Ya... i know, so what. just now i'm starting to get my digestive system working again. I didnt eat! My mom stopped eating and so did i! 4 months later and im continueing to work on my personal affects of caregiving. But you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way!! And thats a fact. Continueing to feel, part of me is gone in losing my mom. We reconstructed our mom daughter relationship during her illness. And i am blessed. But i feel, the ones who cared the most, gave the most of "ourselves" are hurting the most. Today we took the day off. Many don't understand this. And thats o.k. just a day to cry, remember, feel guilt.... etc...
Grieving is a very lonesome happening. It seems i am still going through an angry stage. Not towards my mom, but to others. I feel hostile at times. Granted, many are deserving of this lol..... but now many other issues are coming along with our grief. Which is something ive read can happen. My daughter and i do have some "good days" now.... but we still do "crash".... our spirituality holds us together, in our belief that we will all be together one wonderful day.. but still, missing so much the physical presence of my mom. I guess im going on and on, and i apologize, but now, i know, what others have gone through and then, i was not understanding of it. I have found, in voicing our feelings here, is a good thing, but many don't reply. They just express their own feelings. In searching articles on this site is where i found some relief. I hope in sharing some, this helps for you. Each one of us is different, and that is a for sure. Blessings to you for your love given to your mom, for i know what you went through!

Laurenelyse said:

My Mother passed away on June 11th,2009. I am new to this group. One that none of us wants to belong. My Mom was my best friend. We were only 20 years apart in age. She married my Dad at 18,he was 20. (they were childhood sweethearts). They were married for over 35 years. Mom's life revolved around her family. She had her Grandchildren with her everyday. She was 63 when she passed away from Liver Cancer. I was lucky enough to have her in our home her last 4 weeks. Although Hospice checked in on her once a day,Myself,My Husband, My Sister,and 2 Aunts took care of her around the clock needs. I'm so thankful we were able to give her that. That's how she wanted to go. Now I'm dealing with trying to pick up the pieces. She was such a huge part in our every day lives that I'm just lost. People will tell me"It gets better in time" I don't know how that could be. When I think of not seeing her or hearing her voice for 20,30,+ years. I cannot comprehend it at all! If anyone has advice on how they dealt with their loss I would appreciate your sharing it. Thank you. Laurenelyse

Permalink Reply by STACIANNE CANELLO on August 8, 2009 at 11:26pm

MY MOM PASSED AWAY ALMOST A YR AGO ON AUG 30TH,2008. SHE WAS MY BEST FRIEND BESIDES MY MOM AND I WAS ALWAYS CLOSE TO HER SINCE I WAS BORN. I MISS HER SO MUCH I CANNOT STAND IT. EVERY DAY AND NIGHT OF EVERY HOUR I CRY FOR HER. IM AN INSOMINIAC, IT RUNS IN MY FAMILY, HAD IT BEFORE SHE PASSED, BUT THE PANIC ATTACKS AT NIGHT WHEN I FINALLY CAN SLEEP ARE AWFUL. I GO THROUGH EVERYTHING AND SEE EVERYTHING IN MY MIND OF THE DAY SHE SAID DOES HER FOOT LOOK PURPLE TO HER OPS TO HER AMPUTATION TO THE CARDIAC ARREST SHE HAD ON THE PHONE WITH ME, TO ME DOING HER HAIR AND MAKE UP FOR THE FUNERAL(IM A HAIRDRESSER) EVERY NIGHT ITS THE SAME I JUST WISH SHE WAS BACK WITH US AND ILL NEVER LET MY NEPHEW, HER ONLY GRANDSON WHO SHE WAS SO CLOSE TO EVER FORGET HER AND HOW MUCH SEE LOVED HIM

Permalink Reply by STACIANNE CANELLO on August 8, 2009 at 11:28pm

STACIANNE CANELLO said:

MY MOM PASSED AWAY ALMOST A YR AGO ON AUG 30TH,2008. SHE WAS MY BEST FRIEND BESIDES MY MOM AND I WAS ALWAYS CLOSE TO HER SINCE I WAS BORN. I MISS HER SO MUCH I CANNOT STAND IT. EVERY DAY AND NIGHT OF EVERY HOUR I CRY FOR HER. IM AN INSOMINIAC, IT RUNS IN MY FAMILY, HAD IT BEFORE SHE PASSED, BUT THE PANIC ATTACKS AT NIGHT WHEN I FINALLY CAN SLEEP ARE AWFUL. I GO THROUGH EVERYTHING AND SEE EVERYTHING IN MY MIND OF THE DAY SHE SAID DOES HER FOOT LOOK PURPLE TO HER OPS TO HER AMPUTATION TO THE CARDIAC ARREST SHE HAD ON THE PHONE WITH ME, TO ME DOING HER HAIR AND MAKE UP FOR THE FUNERAL(IM A HAIRDRESSER) EVERY NIGHT ITS THE SAME I JUST WISH SHE WAS BACK WITH US AND ILL NEVER LET MY NEPHEW, HER ONLY GRANDSON WHO SHE WAS SO CLOSE TO EVER FORGET HER AND HOW MUCH SEE LOVED HIM

Permalink Reply by STACIANNE CANELLO on August 8, 2009 at 11:36pm

ALSO SHE WAS ONLY 68YRS OLD AND THE CONVLESENT HOME SHE WAS AT SHE WAS TELLING ME ON THE PHONE THEY WERE BEING MEAN TO HER AND NOT TREATING HER GOOD. HER DR WAS SHOCKED SHE PASSED. SHE HAD EKGS EVERY DAY AND HER HEART WAS GOOD. I DEFFINATELY THINK THEY DID SOMETHING AND MY DAD DIDNT WANT AN AUTOPSY BECAUSE SHE HAD HAD 5 OPERATIONS AND THEN THE LEG AMP. AND HE DIDNT WANT HER CUT UP ANY MORE, BUT I HATE NOT KNOWING AND THE DR TOLD ME THE AMBULANCE PEOPLE DID EVERYTHING TO SAVE MY MOM BUT THAT THE HOME DIDNT DO CPR AND THEY SHOULD HAVE. IF THEY DID SOMETHING TO HER THEY TOOK MY MOM AWAY FROM ME MY DAD MY BRO HER SISTER AND HER GRANDSON. I CANNOT STAND THAT SHES NOT HERE. IT KILLS ME EVERY DAY. WE ALWAYS WATCHED BIG BROTHER TOGETHER FOR 10 YRS AND EVEN LAST YEAR WHEN SHE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL WE WATCHED TOGETHER AND THIS YEAR SHES NOT HEAR TO WATCH WITH ME IT STARTED ON HER BIRTHDAY TO THIS YEAR JULY 9TH AND EVERY TIME ITS ON I TURN HER PIC TO THE TV AND SAY MA ARE YOU WATCHING AND I CRY EVERY TIME. SHE HAD SO MUCH STRENGHT AND COURAGE AFTER HER AMPUTATION AND I TOLD HER THAT AND HOW PROUD I WAS OF HER AND WHEN I SAW HER FOR THE FIRST TIME UP AND DRESED AND IN HER WHEELCHAIR DOING HER EXCERCISES IN THERAPOY I CRIED TEARS OF JOY I WAS SO PROUD OF MY MOM. SHE WAS THE BEST AND GAVE UP SO MUCH FOR ME TO HAVE THE BEST AND THE LAST THING I COULD DO FOR HER WAS TO MAKE HER LOOK BEAUTIFUL AND HAVE A NICE OUTFIT TO BE BURIED WITH AND EVERYONE SAID HOW BEAUTIFUL SHE LOOKED AND I DID MOST OF THE FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS AND STUFF AND THE ONLY DAY I FELT GOOD WHAS ON THE DAY OF HER FUNERAL MY DAD SAID TO ME IN THE KITCHEN BEFORE WE LEFT THAT MY MOM WOULD BE SO PROUD OF ME FOR EVERYTHING I DID AND HOW I ACTED

Permalink Reply by Robin Brodkin on August 11, 2009 at 8:44pm

This is so true! My mother died unexpectedly in April and I don't know how long I will deal with the greif. On top of that, my uncle - her brother - died two weeks ago from lung cancer and I don''t know what is harder...the grief from his death or the greif I feel all over again from loosing her. And I am fighting with my brother and sister-in-law about every thing. Does it ever get better. Will I ever stop wanting 'my mommy' back at the ripe old age of 46?

Permalink Reply by JAYLEEN on August 11, 2009 at 9:06pm

robin, i know how u feel, i have buried one family member a month since febuary, but ill never get over my mom. she was everything to all of us, the grieving is continuos for me. so i feel your pain totally.

Robin Brodkin said:

This is so true! My mother died unexpectedly in April and I don't know how long I will deal with the greif. On top of that, my uncle - her brother - died two weeks ago from lung cancer and I don''t know what is harder...the grief from his death or the greif I feel all over again from loosing her. And I am fighting with my brother and sister-in-law about every thing. Does it ever get better. Will I ever stop wanting 'my mommy' back at the ripe old age of 46?