The loss of a child

Hi Gwen, although we have never met, i am deeply saddened by you loss. Death itself could certainly be described as negative. The Word of God describes it as an “enemy,” which will eventually be brought to nothing. (1 Cor. 15:26) The negative, sorrowful experience of losing a loved one in death and subsequently the positive experience of learning about the wonderful hope of the resurrection of the dead may cause a person to be drawn to God.
Jesus said: “I am the resurrection and the life.” (John 11:25) He is the One whom Jehovah will empower to perform resurrections on a global scale. Jesus said: “The hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear [Christ’s] voice and come out.” (John 5:28, 29) . Embrace this hope Gwen and draw close to God.

gwendolyn brown said:
my name is gwen and i have lost two children one boy and one girl i thought my heart was going to break i would like to email and talk to someone please gwen

Permalink Reply by amaryllis on March 22, 2010 at 5:00pm

Hi, Gwen, my heart is close to yours - i can relate to you.
the words Maribel wrote are beautiful.
you have my thoughts and my prayers.
blessings xxxxxxx

KAREN Heyworth said:

Maribel said:
Hi Gwen, although we have never met, i am deeply saddened by you loss. Death itself could certainly be described as negative. The Word of God describes it as an “enemy,” which will eventually be brought to nothing. (1 Cor. 15:26) The negative, sorrowful experience of losing a loved one in death and subsequently the positive experience of learning about the wonderful hope of the resurrection of the dead may cause a person to be drawn to God.
Jesus said: “I am the resurrection and the life.” (John 11:25) He is the One whom Jehovah will empower to perform resurrections on a global scale. Jesus said: “The hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear [Christ’s] voice and come out.” (John 5:28, 29) . Embrace this hope Gwen and draw close to God.

gwendolyn brown said:
my name is gwen and i have lost two children one boy and one girl i thought my heart was going to break i would like to email and talk to someone please gwen

Permalink Reply by Deborah Rizzo on March 25, 2010 at 8:53am

Comment by Deborah Rizzo 1 minute ago

To all of you who lost your loved ones quickly - we had nearly 6 years with Tina after her accident. Somedays that is good, somedays that is too hard.
Below is a link to a movie of her early days, middle and ending of her life. This song is "Sissy's song" and the movie is not too long!
If my link does not work - right click your mouse - hit Copy- go to your Browser bar and click on that - it will hi-light get on the hi-lite and hit your right mouse key and PASTE- Then hit Enter - it will start right away.

http://www.slide.com/r/meS_D22s5D8cZ8VaBN1BGnBsZ0BozTLV?previous_vi...

May Peace be with you all and also with us! Deborah Rizzo

Permalink Reply by amaryllis on March 25, 2010 at 9:07am

may peace be with you, too, dear Deborah and thank you so much for sharing the movie.
many blessings and much love xxx

Deborah Rizzo said:

Comment by Deborah Rizzo 1 minute ago

To all of you who lost your loved ones quickly - we had nearly 6 years with Tina after her accident. Somedays that is good, somedays that is too hard.
Below is a link to a movie of her early days, middle and ending of her life. This song is "Sissy's song" and the movie is not too long!
If my link does not work - right click your mouse - hit Copy- go to your Browser bar and click on that - it will hi-light get on the hi-lite and hit your right mouse key and PASTE- Then hit Enter - it will start right away.

http://www.slide.com/r/meS_D22s5D8cZ8VaBN1BGnBsZ0BozTLV?previous_vi...

May Peace be with you all and also with us! Deborah Rizzo

Permalink Reply by Crystal on March 27, 2010 at 7:30pm

My name is Crystal, and I lost my beloved grandson, Ian, on Feb. 13, 2010. He was going to turn 3 months on the 17th. On that morning, my daughter called me screaming into the phone that Ian wasn't breathing. They had woken up because Ian hadn't woken up for his morning bottle. When Ian's daddy looked into his bassinet, he realized that he wasn't breathing. By the time I got to the hospital, he was gone. His death has devestated this family. The doctors had said that they thought Ian died from SIDS. We took their word for it. We struggled thrue the rosary, and then the funeral. We struggled with washing his clothes and packing them away. We just struggled. Then we recently got the ME's report back and it said that Ian actually died from bacterial pneumonia. We were in shock. Ian had been diagnosed with RSV about a week before he died, but he had been getting better. His cold was gone and his cough was going away, He was eating and sleeping fine. There were no symtons of him getting worse. The ME said that Ian had gotten over the RSV but since his immune system was already weakened, it allowed the pneumonia to come in and it killed him. He said that even if we had known that he was getting worse, he probably wouldn't have survived. It all happen so quickly. We were devestated all over again. Now it feels like I'm just living a nightmare and I can't wake up. I just feel so lost.

Permalink Reply by shannon on March 30, 2010 at 11:54am

hi name is shannon i just lost my son on march'02'2010he was only 11 yrs old he dx back 2002 with a brain cancer had surgeys chemo radation so was remission for 7yrs we notice some diffrent things with him so they gave him mri on jan,14.2010 they foung bad news jonathan had two new tumors which nothing could be done it was in his brain stem and other was in his cerbella.so we went with his he was under hospice carethey where very great to him they gave us 3to6 months to live he lasted 47 days

Permalink Reply by shannon on March 30, 2010 at 11:55am

shannon said:

hi name is shannon i just lost my son on march'02'2010he was only 11 yrs old he dx back 2002 with a brain cancer had surgeys chemo radation so was remission for 7yrs we notice some diffrent things with him so they gave him mri on jan,14.2010 they foung bad news jonathan had two new tumors which nothing could be done it was in his brain stem and other was in his cerbella.so we went with his he was under hospice carethey where very great to him they gave us 3to6 months to live he lasted 47 days

any one like talk to me email mommyslilangels5@aol.com

Permalink Reply by Kim on March 31, 2010 at 8:33am

It has been one month since my son took his life. He was 33. I miss him so much, I cannot express my feelings. His life seemed to be going very well, then in Dec 2008 something happened. He became a very different person. I brought him to the hospital for an evaluation. they admitted him. Diagnosis bi-polar disorder. 6 months off and on in the hospital.

So they treated him with outpatient therapy, meds, inpatient. Everything. Well that went on for 6 months. On Nov. 7 2010, Lee called the police and said he wanted to shoot himself but did not want me his mom to find such a mess. Surly a cry for help. When he was there all he did was sleep, the nurses never bothered to try get him up to help him with day to day life. No therapy nothing. Clearly a sign of depression. I would go visit him everyday aand he would always be sleeping, I had to wake him. The Dr. he was working with the last month rediagnosed Lee and told him he did not have bi-polar and took him off all meds. Let him out Dec 9 2010 with no treatment nothing, and even told him don't come back. He seemed ok, but I felt he was hurting. Then on Feb, 28th 2010 he hung himself, I went over there and found him. I was distraught. I will never forget that picture in my mind, by poor son. Ihttp://mi-cache.legacy.com:80/usercontent/guestbook/photos/2010-03/TN38689767.jpgx?w=75&h=63&option=1&fc=F5F7EB think that when someone goes into the hospital for suicide, get taken off all treatment-let go, and 6 month before was being treated for bi-polar, there has been a huge mistake. I am angry when I think about the help he could have recieved.

Permalink Reply by amaryllis on March 31, 2010 at 9:19am

Hi Kim, it breaks my heart to read your comment on your son's death, illness and treatment. i understand your pain more thank you possible imagine, however i am here not to answer your comment with my story, but to let you know you are not alone and i already made a prayer for you.
after loosing a loved one, yes we cry and cry, we feel so lost, so helpless. i hope and pray this suffering will lead you to an unbelievable spirituall growth as it did to me. there was a time when i just could cry and miss my son - one day in the middle of a prayer suddenly came to my mind that our soul does not die, we are eternal as eternal is the universe and all things are supposed to keep going in a constant change, improving forever and ever. from that day on i started talking to him instead of crying for him.
i feel peace instead of desperation, as i believe one day we will meet again and for doing so i feel i am close to him. as i was able to calm down and to feel peace in my heart i received signs from the other side and this has been so great! more my heart is in peace better i feel and closer to him i am.
dear Kim, some time later write again. God bless you and us all! much love xxxxxx
Kim said:

It has been one month since my son took his life. He was 33. I miss him so much, I cannot express my feelings. His life seemed to be going very well, then in Dec 2008 something happened. He became a very different person. I brought him to the hospital for an evaluation. they admitted him. Diagnosis bi-polar disorder. 6 months off and on in the hospital. So they treated him with outpatient therapy, meds, inpatient. Everything. Well that went on for 6 months. On Nov. 7 2010, Lee called the police and said he wanted to shoot himself but did not want me his mom to find such a mess. Surly a cry for help. When he was there all he did was sleep, the nurses never bothered to try get him up to help him with day to day life. No therapy nothing. Clearly a sign of depression. I would go visit him everyday aand he would always be sleeping, I had to wake him. The Dr. he was working with the last month rediagnosed Lee and told him he did not have bi-polar and took him off all meds. Let him out Dec 9 2010 with no treatment nothing, and even told him don't come back. He seemed ok, but I felt he was hurting. Then on Feb, 28th 2010 he hung himself, I went over there and found him. I was distraught. I will never forget that picture in my mind, by poor son. Ihttp://mi-cache.legacy.com:80/usercontent/guestbook/photos/2010-03/TN38689767.jpgx?w=75&h=63&option=1&fc=F5F7EB think that when someone goes into the hospital for suicide, get taken off all treatment-let go, and 6 month before was being treated for bi-polar, there has been a huge mistake. I am angry when I think about the help he could have recieved.

Permalink Reply by Gerry Fiden on March 31, 2010 at 9:23am

Kim,

My heart goes out to you. To lose a child in any manner,is devastating. To lose one by suicide or by the hands of another are probably the worse, as they were not preventable by us.in any way. My son was killed by a drunk driver Sept 8th 2009. We had no goodbyes. All on this site grieve for their children and all our pain is the same and the death of our children makes no sense to us. We are all here to talk and listen.

God be with you
Gerry
Kim said:

It has been one month since my son took his life. He was 33. I miss him so much, I cannot express my feelings. His life seemed to be going very well, then in Dec 2008 something happened. He became a very different person. I brought him to the hospital for an evaluation. they admitted him. Diagnosis bi-polar disorder. 6 months off and on in the hospital. So they treated him with outpatient therapy, meds, inpatient. Everything. Well that went on for 6 months. On Nov. 7 2010, Lee called the police and said he wanted to shoot himself but did not want me his mom to find such a mess. Surly a cry for help. When he was there all he did was sleep, the nurses never bothered to try get him up to help him with day to day life. No therapy nothing. Clearly a sign of depression. I would go visit him everyday aand he would always be sleeping, I had to wake him. The Dr. he was working with the last month rediagnosed Lee and told him he did not have bi-polar and took him off all meds. Let him out Dec 9 2010 with no treatment nothing, and even told him don't come back. He seemed ok, but I felt he was hurting. Then on Feb, 28th 2010 he hung himself, I went over there and found him. I was distraught. I will never forget that picture in my mind, by poor son. Ihttp://mi-cache.legacy.com:80/usercontent/guestbook/photos/2010-03/TN38689767.jpgx?w=75&h=63&option=1&fc=F5F7EB think that when someone goes into the hospital for suicide, get taken off all treatment-let go, and 6 month before was being treated for bi-polar, there has been a huge mistake. I am angry when I think about the help he could have recieved.

Permalink Reply by amaryllis on March 31, 2010 at 9:46am

Hi Gerry, i am reading your comment and yes, to loose a son is always devastating but when the death is not a natural death it is even more cruel to bear, it is a different feeling. anyway we go through the process and it always lead us to a path of higher spiritual growth and observing our own self we see how much we improve through the pain we feel. after cryind and crying for my son's death i reminded myself life is eternal and from that moment on i talk to him, i feel close to him, i started getting signs from the other side, i feel much more in peace, instead of feeling lost, i believe one day we will meet again. wish we could communicate again. Blessings and much Love. xxxxx

Gerry Fiden said:

Kim,

My heart goes out to you. To lose a child in any manner,is devastating. To lose one by suicide or by the hands of another are probably the worse, as they were not preventable by us.in any way. My son was killed by a drunk driver Sept 8th 2009. We had no goodbyes. All on this site grieve for their children and all our pain is the same and the death of our children makes no sense to us. We are all here to talk and listen.

God be with you
Gerry
Kim said:
It has been one month since my son took his life. He was 33. I miss him so much, I cannot express my feelings. His life seemed to be going very well, then in Dec 2008 something happened. He became a very different person. I brought him to the hospital for an evaluation. they admitted him. Diagnosis bi-polar disorder. 6 months off and on in the hospital. So they treated him with outpatient therapy, meds, inpatient. Everything. Well that went on for 6 months. On Nov. 7 2010, Lee called the police and said he wanted to shoot himself but did not want me his mom to find such a mess. Surly a cry for help. When he was there all he did was sleep, the nurses never bothered to try get him up to help him with day to day life. No therapy nothing. Clearly a sign of depression. I would go visit him everyday aand he would always be sleeping, I had to wake him. The Dr. he was working with the last month rediagnosed Lee and told him he did not have bi-polar and took him off all meds. Let him out Dec 9 2010 with no treatment nothing, and even told him don't come back. He seemed ok, but I felt he was hurting. Then on Feb, 28th 2010 he hung himself, I went over there and found him. I was distraught. I will never forget that picture in my mind, by poor son. Ihttp://mi-cache.legacy.com:80/usercontent/guestbook/photos/2010-03/TN38689767.jpgx?w=75&h=63&option=1&fc=F5F7EB think that when someone goes into the hospital for suicide, get taken off all treatment-let go, and 6 month before was being treated for bi-polar, there has been a huge mistake. I am angry when I think about the help he could have recieved.

Permalink Reply by Ann on April 1, 2010 at 6:02pm

I am reading all the messages & feel such a common ground. Its a sad comfort to hear other people are experiencing the same grief you are. I lost my 36 year old son almost a year ago (4/16/09) due to liver failure (alcoholism). The whole final days were so foggy for me, I think I was on auto pilot dealing with everything. To this day I remember his face as he took his last breathe, peace finally. He was a wonderful son, never a sloppy drunk, infact you could not really tell he had been drinking all day. He held a job & functioned normally. he new he had a problem & went to rehab once, did not work & he hid his medical problems (liver failure) for a long time until it was obvious but then it was too late, other functions were shutting down. I have not gone to his grave yet but do talk to him almost daily, he is in my heart always. Unless you have experienced the loss of a child, you cannot imagine the pain. Sometimes I cannot believe hes gone, does not seem possible. You do survive, & I learned that tears are a healing process, its just that they seem to flow unexpectantly. All my prayers go to those that find this website.