Tags:
Today is exactly 6 weeks, to the hour, of Mark's death. Am I only one who counts time now from that anchor point? Probably not. When life gets so overwhelming, this is where I come to read words of hope and encouragement!
In an effort to distract myself, I've been scrubbing the walls to remove all the cigarette smoke stains, and listening to my rational mind telling my emotional mind things it probably needs to hear. It's that rational mind that sometimes posts messages here as if there is no emotion involved. There are times I think I might have a split personality :-)
In an earlier message, Charles, you mentioned making a deal with God, to allow us a little more time together. I wonder if we would make such a deal if we knew we would have to go through the early stages of grief all over again. I would like to go back to a week before his death to do things differently; if I could, he would still be here with me. People would value each other in a special way if they had any idea of what they would feel if they were to suddenly lose that special person to death. When I hear couples now being angry over the dumbest little thing, and being unkind to each other, I feel like screaming at them. I can remember when Mark and I were just friends, thinking how empty the world would be if he were not in it, even if he couldn't be with me, and the tears would flow just thinking about it. As they are now.
Today is exactly 6 weeks, to the hour, of Mark's death. Am I only one who counts time now from that anchor point? Probably not. When life gets so overwhelming, this is where I come to read words of hope and encouragement!
In an effort to distract myself, I've been scrubbing the walls to remove all the cigarette smoke stains, and listening to my rational mind telling my emotional mind things it probably needs to hear. It's that rational mind that sometimes posts messages here as if there is no emotion involved. There are times I think I might have a split personality :-)
In an earlier message, Charles, you mentioned making a deal with God, to allow us a little more time together. I wonder if we would make such a deal if we knew we would have to go through the early stages of grief all over again. I would like to go back to a week before his death to do things differently; if I could, he would still be here with me. People would value each other in a special way if they had any idea of what they would feel if they were to suddenly lose that special person to death. When I hear couples now being angry over the dumbest little thing, and being unkind to each other, I feel like screaming at them. I can remember when Mark and I were just friends, thinking how empty the world would be if he were not in it, even if he couldn't be with me, and the tears would flow just thinking about it. As they are now.
Randloph, My husband Terry was also an organ donor as am I. They couldn't use any of his organs because of the cancer, but he was able to donate his corneas. I received a letter from the N.C. Eye Bank saying that through his donation 2 people had been given the gift of sight. What a beautiful legacy to leave behind. I haven't really talked about this a lot because this is another hill to climb, so to speak. The one year anniversary of Terry's death is March 22. On March 27 I have to attend a Memorial Tribute by the Eye Bank honoring the 2009 donors. This is going to be one of the hardest things I've had to do since his death, but I will get through it. Has anyone else been to anything like this? I'm not sure what to expect. Irene
Oh Charles, You are so sweet. I can see why Doris loved you so much. I write to you a lot because I can hear your pain in the words you write about Doris. It takes a special man to care for his wife's illness for 13 years. No offense guys, but most men usually aren't care givers. It just seems to be second nature to women because that is how we were raised. Like I said, you and the others who comment on a daily basis have helped me as much as you say I've helped you. I am finding joy in my life again because you take the time to care.
Group hug! Group hug! Irene
Please be respectful of others. For more information, read our Community Guidelines.
© 2023 Created by Legacy.com.
Powered by