Life Can Be Good Again

It is such a great feeling to celebrate our loved one. Everytime I start talking about Douglas I smile now, I even laugh at some of the antics he pulled, and I still cry when necessary. Eight months ago I never dreamed that I would be at this point in the grief process. Baby steps, that is what it takes to get to where I am now. The Celebration of Life party is coming along great. Many friends are so eager to help with the planning. I am having it at a very special resort in my home state (Washington) and so the buffet will be hosted by the facility. But the music will be provided by his friends (Douglas was a musician and recording engineer) and we will dance and sing, wear our tie-dye and groove on out!

Do I miss him -- absolutely and always will. I have accepted that I miss the "physical" Douglas because the spiritual Douglas is and always has been with me. That will never go away. We have all been blessed to have loved and been loved by these incredible people. They are out of pain, watching over us (and you all know that that is a FULL time job -- some of us are more challenging then others!), and they are preparing a place for us once we have finished what we were meant to do on this earth. My Douglas finished his mission on July 17, 2009 -- he always had to be first! I am not searching for my task on earth but living every day to its fullest. That is what he did, what he wants me to do, and the Celebration of Life will continue once I join him.

Things get easier to accept and deal with as time marches on. We will cry, scream, laugh, and look confused, but we will all be doing it together. This group is excellent and I am so very thankful for each of you as I pass through the many stages of grief. Friends -- who could ask for better?

In peace,

Brigitte

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Permalink Reply by Charles on March 13, 2010 at 5:34am

Hi Brigitte, I am one of those people here that thought things could never get better.Well I am living proof that things can get better.
What amazes me Brigitte is that when a positive post is made we do not receive any response. I wonder why?
Life goes on without our soul mate, Different life yes, but Life goes on.
It's just what we make of that life we have left.
Thank you for posting such positive writings about your life without Douglas and how you have gone on with your life.
I am still heart broke and will die heart broke but I will go on with my life and enjoy, laughter, smiles, and maybe love. Who knows.
Thank you Brigitte,,,, Charles

Permalink Reply by kathleen caylor on March 13, 2010 at 6:32am

Briggitte,That was lovely!I agree ,by moving forward we are honoring our loved ones.We have moved past the "what if's and the how come" part.We are now trying to figure the future.None of us ever wanted to be here.But thank God we found this site!If it hadn't been here I would have curled up in the corner and would be talking to myself!Thanks to you and all of the "Family" here I personally say I am a better person.I have received some valuable insights and a shoulder to cry on when I needed it.Lois said it would take 2-4 years to get through our grief,I think it will will be a lifetime.Irene spoke of "a safe journey" and Yacca spoke of our "elephant in the room",Ann must be the sweetest person in the world,she is always so thoughtful!And look at how far Charles has come!Now theres Tom,who has this "thing" about icecream,which is hilarious!And Linda who lives in Hawaii,and missmylove that is here with me in Florida!So .you see you all are priceless!Thank each and everyone for your kind words!I know I must have left a few names out,there have been so many! there's Linda,Yvonne,Jo,Suzanne,I feel like "Miss Mary on Romper Room,looking through the mirror"Trying to remember the names!Peace to everyone,Kathy

Permalink Reply by kathleen caylor on March 13, 2010 at 8:39am

Lois,you are so insightful!Holding on and letting go!!That was beautiful,Kathy

Permalink Reply by Colleen on March 13, 2010 at 9:27am

Thank you for posting this - I really needed to read something wonderful this morning.

Permalink Reply by BoLynn on March 13, 2010 at 7:42pm

"SMILING"..........you all are the greatest!!!!!!!!!!!

Permalink Reply by BoLynn on March 13, 2010 at 8:55pm

Yahooo!!!!!!!!!!! Donut Party! Can I have a lemon filled, please? Tom you are the greatest!

Permalink Reply by kathleen caylor on March 13, 2010 at 9:12pm

Don't you dare make me laugh!!!I want to be miserable!I'll take Cream fiiled chocolate!!!

Permalink Reply by kathleen caylor on March 13, 2010 at 9:32pm

Hey Tom,What do you think about a short, fat 60 year old woman??(I ate too much ice cream and donuts)???Any takers???

Permalink Reply by Yvonne on March 13, 2010 at 10:03pm

Donuts. Did someone mention donuts? Count me in!

Permalink Reply by Brigitte on March 13, 2010 at 11:32pm

Okay, now I am going to have to have donuts and ice cream at the Celebration of Life -- in honor of my friends here! You guys!!!!

Tom said:

Me too ?
I want to be great !
Time for donuts !
Ran out of icecream !
Tom

Permalink Reply by alan demetri on March 14, 2010 at 2:46am

hi brigitte i most admit the idea of celebation party is new to me how long did you wait to have this party?on the 26th off this month it will be 2yrs scense my wife went home to the Lord and i can only say that iv not been looking foreward to it far from it.maybe next year ill be able to get some off our family and friends togather ,but thank you for sareing this with us it sounds like a great idea i guess im just not ready. God bless you i pray that it will be all you hope it be. alan d

Permalink Reply by kathleen caylor on March 14, 2010 at 9:31am

Tom,Give me a Harley or an airboat ,and I'm yours!!A unicycle???