What Day Do You Dread?

I know Wednesday's are very hard for me as that's the day I lost my husband. I always come to all of you here for support that day as I know whatever I write everybody understands. I was wondering if anybody else would like to share their day and little bit of how? Also if you if you need extra support that day or would prefer to be left alone?

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Permalink Reply by Hurting on May 30, 2010 at 7:15pm

Fernandohulya thanks for the offer! That's the best thing about this site we all hurt with each other and understand each other. If you really want to know what I would really like on this Wednesday is to wake up from this nightmare, is it possible?

Fernandohulya said:

Hurting, for me Thursday is not even a day in a calender. I am trying to accept this day especially the evenings to so my children do not have to because of their schools, staying back for drama or for sports or IT. BUT IT IS THE 25TH who bugs me the number, always going to be for the rest of my life. What you like to do? If you want me to be there for Wednesdays, I will be online!!!

with lots of hugs

Permalink Reply by Basia on May 31, 2010 at 12:17pm

I dread waking up every morning. Then I dread getting through lunch, then evening. The only thing i don't mind is when I pop my sleeping pill and pass out for a few hours. Father's day is coming up soon, that scares me. Then Terry's birthday in August, and our Anniversary in October. I hope I'll make it till then.

Permalink Reply by Hurting on May 31, 2010 at 5:43pm

Basia I dread taking sleeping pill because I am always worried that something bad will happen and I want to be conscious for that. I think if it wasn't for my kids who are always around me for something it would have been very hard. Take care.

Basia said:

I dread waking up every morning. Then I dread getting through lunch, then evening. The only thing i don't mind is when I pop my sleeping pill and pass out for a few hours. Father's day is coming up soon, that scares me. Then Terry's birthday in August, and our Anniversary in October. I hope I'll make it till then.

Permalink Reply by Nina on May 31, 2010 at 11:22pm

Hi, Mondays, Fridays, and the 1st of each month are my bad days. God called my beloved husband home on Monday March 1, 2010, 2:20 AM, Fridays was our day to treat ourselves to either Pizza, or we'd go to a favorite buffet for lunch. These 3 days are the days that I dead the most. We have been together 20 yrs, was married 17 yrs on 3-19. God Blessed me with a truly wonderful husband and lots of wonderful and beautiful memories. I really miss my husband alot and the wonderful life that we had together. I no that my husband and I will be together again when God calls me home. Take Care, God Bless

Permalink Reply by Brigitte on June 1, 2010 at 9:51am

I dread the weekend. We did all of our fun things those two days. And I prefer to keep to myself to remember those times. It will be a year in July that Douglas died and yet it feels like yesterday. It is easier to visit our familiar hang outs and I don't cry as often or for as long. Yet my heart is broken and I miss him terribly. Moving on with my life is as difficult as the grieving process. Maybe they are the same -- it feels like it. I almost feel guilty about moving on without Douglas. It is as though I am leaving him behind like he never was a part of my life. That isn't the case, he was my life. I am hoping this second year will be easier -- like all the reading material tells us. I did get accepted into grad school and start in August. Douglas would approve! After that is done I will seriously consider retirement and relocating to a place that will allow me the freedom to start over. Douglas would approve! He will always be in my heart and I love him eternally. The last of the "firsts" are coming up -- his birthday, July 4th, our anniversary and the day of his death. It will be hard but I know I can do it. Thank you all for being here. It helps!

Peace,

Brigitte

Permalink Reply by Connie on June 1, 2010 at 1:01pm

My husband passed on a Monday morning but I do think that the week days are harder for me than the weekends. On the weekends the kids keep me busy but during the week the little ones are in school and as a matter of fact the big ones are in school also. I get to see them all much more on the weekends. I just feel that life in general is terrible 7 days a week. I find things to do and places to go but it has to be something that I didn't do with my husband. Anything that we did together is really bad. But it seems as though he is on my mind constantly. I can think of nothing else but him. No matter what it is that I am doing, he is on my mind too. Things that I did when he was here I just cannot do yet. I used to do cross stitch and I cannot even attempt to do it yet. I feel the same as Suzanne that I wait for the day that the Lord calls me too. I know when they put me along side of him I will be able to reach out and touch his hand. Then I will be happy again.

Permalink Reply by CINDY POWELL on June 29, 2010 at 5:55pm

tracie just wanted to comment on what you said about your husband willing to do whatever it took to be able to live another day.my husband was the same way, he didnt want to die.he really did try and fight to the bitter end. he also passed away from cancer, very quickly. i just pray that someday i will be able to enjoy life again. i am only going through the motions, of living, i really am only exsisting.i never told my husband that i couldnt or didnt want to go on without him, though i would have liked too, but i just couldnt say it since he told me that he didnt want to leave me alone. i think he know how hard it would be on me.i ask God everyday to show me how i can be of use to him and especially others.i need to feel like their is a reason for me to be here without my husband.

Permalink Reply by The Heart Broken Widow on June 29, 2010 at 10:45pm

It has been some time since I have visited here. I lost my husband, my best friend,my soul mate on May 4th from lung cancer. The last three months of his life were hell. He suffered so much but always in silence. Because he suffered so too did I because I loved him so much it tore me apart to see him go through all that he did. So many times I wished that I could take his pain and make it mine. Since he has left me I have not known a good day. They are all hard and my heartache just blends into one day after another. They say you don't know what you miss until it is gone but the truth(at least for me)is that I started missing him long before he left and i too suffered in silence only because I knew that it would make his pain even worse. One thing is or sure, I will never love another. Heart broken in Norwood---Sandralee

Permalink Reply by Basia on June 30, 2010 at 8:29am

Everyday .I just want everything to be over. I want the morning over with, then the afternoon, then the evening, then I take a pill and go to sleep and hope I don't wake up during the night. Then it starts all over again. I don't know how I will get through the rest of my life. Life is supposed to begin at fourth and Terry's ended and so did mine.

Permalink Reply by Randolph L. Schrader on June 30, 2010 at 10:25am

The day I dread is the day my wife died,April 16,on her birthday. It is not that date I dread, its that day,moment, I became alone and without my pal for the first time in over 44 years. I dread everyday because everyday is nothing to me now.Hugs to all. Hugs are good.

Permalink Reply by BoLynn on June 30, 2010 at 12:37pm

Today, June 30th, 10 months ago today, at this time my Bo would be here with me for 3 hours and 5 minutes more. At 12.35 he went home to the Lord. I will love you forever my Sweet and miss you every second of my life.