Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Hurting on October 7, 2010 at 11:20pm

I do, we all do, that's why we are all here. To listen to each other and share our sorrows. My husband passed away on December 23, 2009. It was a silent heart attack, whenever I give myself time to contemplate on that day, disbelief, shock and pain all wager a battle. I cry whenever I feel like, I talk about him whenever I have too. All the relatives that can't understand my feelings right now I have just bycotted them. I will pray for you and all of us.

Permalink Reply by Linda Robertson on March 24, 2011 at 6:09pm

Well it's been 31 monthes now that Buddy has been gone, It's coming up to 3 years and it's taking a tole on me, I am so depressed and down, Just not sure how to handle this. It's all most like I am reliving all over again, And I don't understand why myself, Must less be able to tell someone else why.

No one understands the void that is there unless they have walked in our shoes, And I can't tell them and make them understand, They all think I should just be over it by now, I am not sure I will ever be over it.

I don't like the person, I am becomeing, I am doing things I have never done before in my life, and it's scaring the heck out of me.

I miss having his arms around me , I miss being able to lay on his chest and hear his heart beat, I just miss everything about him.

How do we just pick up and go with life ? Can anyone tell me this ? I feel like I am just lost and don't know how or where I should go.

I am hopeing there is someone else that fills like I do, I just know I hate this feeling.

Thanks for letting me vent.  Hugs and prays to you all.   Linda

 

Permalink Reply by Tina Walker on March 24, 2011 at 6:54pm

Linda totally understandable how you feel it's been 2 months yesterday that I lost my hubby of 19 years..we have a 18 year old son and just celebrated our 19th anniversary Dec. 28th..sumtimes i have my okay days but others from out of the blue sumthing sooo little will trigger off me crying he was my world my soulmate my bestfriend and now he's gone...my son will be goin to college this fall but at least it will be close by so he'll still be living at home I believe I would go crazy if he wasn't here...he's usually in his room most of the time which hubby and i were use to it but just KNOWING he's here means the world to me..You just hang in there well try to and vent all you want okay I wish i could give you a huge hug....Tina

 

 

Permalink Reply by Linda Robertson on March 24, 2011 at 7:24pm

Tina Walker said:

Linda totally understandable how you feel it's been 2 months yesterday that I lost my hubby of 19 years..we have a 18 year old son and just celebrated our 19th anniversary Dec. 28th..sumtimes i have my okay days but others from out of the blue sumthing sooo little will trigger off me crying he was my world my soulmate my bestfriend and now he's gone...my son will be goin to college this fall but at least it will be close by so he'll still be living at home I believe I would go crazy if he wasn't here...he's usually in his room most of the time which hubby and i were use to it but just KNOWING he's here means the world to me..You just hang in there well try to and vent all you want okay I wish i could give you a huge hug....Tina

 

 Thanks Tina, Sorry for your loss, I am here if I can do anything for you, This is still new to you, Wish I could tell you it would get better soon, But I can't say that, You hang in and I will do the same, HUGS BACK AT YOU JUST HOLD ON TO GODS HANDS.

Permalink Reply by Christy on March 24, 2011 at 8:46pm

Linda,
So sorry to hear you're hurting as you are. I lived & worked & spent all my time with my husband as well. We were just getting started, together 8 years, and I am devastated. It has been almost 7 months. I cry from the time I wake up, off & on throughout every day. I cannot imagine how you must feel living & working together for 35 years! My husband, Larry was only 38 years old when he died from an accident at work. Healthy, strong and honestly the most decent man I have ever known. It's a blessing to know he is with God- no doubts at all, but I miss him every moment of every day. I truely do not wish to continue living without him. I pray like never before, read my bibles, actually I study them for relief/peace. My heartfelt prayers for you. Also, do you live in Lawrenceville? I live in Covington & my mom lives in Winder. I grew up in Tucker, so know this area pretty well. Perhaps we could meet sometime for lunch or something. Regardless, I wish you well, Christy

Linda Robertson said:

Well it's been 31 monthes now that Buddy has been gone, It's coming up to 3 years and it's taking a tole on me, I am so depressed and down, Just not sure how to handle this. It's all most like I am reliving all over again, And I don't understand why myself, Must less be able to tell someone else why.

No one understands the void that is there unless they have walked in our shoes, And I can't tell them and make them understand, They all think I should just be over it by now, I am not sure I will ever be over it.

I don't like the person, I am becomeing, I am doing things I have never done before in my life, and it's scaring the heck out of me.

I miss having his arms around me , I miss being able to lay on his chest and hear his heart beat, I just miss everything about him.

How do we just pick up and go with life ? Can anyone tell me this ? I feel like I am just lost and don't know how or where I should go.

I am hopeing there is someone else that fills like I do, I just know I hate this feeling.

Thanks for letting me vent.  Hugs and prays to you all.   Linda

 

Permalink Reply by Sheryl McCormick on March 25, 2011 at 5:55am

Oh yes - I can totally understand.  I even have a son and grandchildren living with me (my daughter in law died 5 1/2 years ago and both of the children have Cystic Fibrosis).  It is so hard - my husband died on 11/5/2010 so it hasn't been as long for me but I can say with each day the loss and lonliness without him is becoming more and more heartbreaking. 

 

We too were married 36 years and we grew up together as friends too (he actually was a friend of my brothers) so we knew each other 46 years.  I am 54 but we married right after I graduated (not so strange in the 70's).  I am so glad we did so I could have those years with him.  We have three sons two married and one a widower (at the young age of 29).  I have three grand-children with life threatening disabilities - it is so hard to deal with all of this without him - he was my shoulder to lean on.  I too have a lot of faith, attend church, work full time, etc.  But noting can fill this void of lonliness.   I am happy to be someone you can talk to when you have these days because I know all to well how it feels.  May God bless you.  Sheryl

Permalink Reply by Linda Robertson on March 25, 2011 at 6:03am

Thanks Sheryl,

So sorry for yours and your sons lost, We just never know what lies a head of us but we do know who will always be there to hold our hands, Could not have made this far if it was not for my Lord.

My prayers are with you. Lets keep in touch, My number is 770-963-8598, Call anytime, Big Hugs to you.

Linda

Sheryl McCormick said:

Oh yes - I can totally understand.  I even have a son and grandchildren living with me (my daughter in law died 5 1/2 years ago and both of the children have Cystic Fibrosis).  It is so hard - my husband died on 11/5/2010 so it hasn't been as long for me but I can say with each day the loss and lonliness without him is becoming more and more heartbreaking. 

 

We too were married 36 years and we grew up together as friends too (he actually was a friend of my brothers) so we knew each other 46 years.  I am 54 but we married right after I graduated (not so strange in the 70's).  I am so glad we did so I could have those years with him.  We have three sons two married and one a widower (at the young age of 29).  I have three grand-children with life threatening disabilities - it is so hard to deal with all of this without him - he was my shoulder to lean on.  I too have a lot of faith, attend church, work full time, etc.  But noting can fill this void of lonliness.   I am happy to be someone you can talk to when you have these days because I know all to well how it feels.  May God bless you.  Sheryl

Permalink Reply by Linda Robertson on March 25, 2011 at 6:22am

Hello Margarita,

Thanks just for reading and listing, It means so much to know  there is others out there that knows just how I feel, I still miss him so much, But I know he is better off,  And in a much better place than me. But that does not take the pain away.

May God be with you, And Big Hugs to you, Maybe we can stay in touch, Take care. linda

margarita chacon said:

HI LINDA IM SORRY FOR YOUR LOST I ALSO LOST MY HUSBAND TO A MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT ON JUNE2008 AND I STILL MISS HIM ALOT I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL IM ONLY 51 AND I DONT THINK ABOUT EVER GETTING MERRIED AGAING THERE IS NOT A GOOD MEN OUT THERE AND NOW  THAT IM SICK I JUST WANT TO BE WITH MY KIDS AND GRANDKIDS AND TRY TO ENJOY THEM AND DO A LITTLE TRAVELING BEFORE I GET MORE SICK.

HUGS

MARGARITA

Permalink Reply by Linda Robertson on March 25, 2011 at 6:30am

Hello Christy,

So nice to hear from you, and thanks for your kind words they mean so much.

Yes I do live in Lawrenceville, I am closer to Grayson but with a l.ville address.

I would love to meet you and have lunch or something, MY number is 770-963-8598 feel free to call anytime, I don't have a lot of friends, I would love to go out with you sometime, Just let me know.

Big hugs to you.  Linda

Christy said:

Linda,
So sorry to hear you're hurting as you are. I lived & worked & spent all my time with my husband as well. We were just getting started, together 8 years, and I am devastated. It has been almost 7 months. I cry from the time I wake up, off & on throughout every day. I cannot imagine how you must feel living & working together for 35 years! My husband, Larry was only 38 years old when he died from an accident at work. Healthy, strong and honestly the most decent man I have ever known. It's a blessing to know he is with God- no doubts at all, but I miss him every moment of every day. I truely do not wish to continue living without him. I pray like never before, read my bibles, actually I study them for relief/peace. My heartfelt prayers for you. Also, do you live in Lawrenceville? I live in Covington & my mom lives in Winder. I grew up in Tucker, so know this area pretty well. Perhaps we could meet sometime for lunch or something. Regardless, I wish you well, Christy

Linda Robertson said:

Well it's been 31 monthes now that Buddy has been gone, It's coming up to 3 years and it's taking a tole on me, I am so depressed and down, Just not sure how to handle this. It's all most like I am reliving all over again, And I don't understand why myself, Must less be able to tell someone else why.

No one understands the void that is there unless they have walked in our shoes, And I can't tell them and make them understand, They all think I should just be over it by now, I am not sure I will ever be over it.

I don't like the person, I am becomeing, I am doing things I have never done before in my life, and it's scaring the heck out of me.

I miss having his arms around me , I miss being able to lay on his chest and hear his heart beat, I just miss everything about him.

How do we just pick up and go with life ? Can anyone tell me this ? I feel like I am just lost and don't know how or where I should go.

I am hopeing there is someone else that fills like I do, I just know I hate this feeling.

Thanks for letting me vent.  Hugs and prays to you all.   Linda

 

Permalink Reply by brenda ortiz on September 19, 2012 at 3:34pm

I am a horrible mess! Let me tell you I dont know how I do it everyday! I am so lost, and extremely sad without my Fiance! We were together for 10 1/2 yrs! We did absolutley everything together! So much so we always talked about it! And he truly was my best friend! I miss waiting by the window with my son joseph! We ate dinner together everysingle nite! We had alot of friends so we went out alot! Not out at bars or clubs but everyone always had a b day or cook out or what ever! I even went to work with my fiance all the time which was let me tell you,,,EXCITING!!! HE WAS A JOCKEY ! YES HE RACED HORSES!!! LOOK at my pictures and there is a picture of my baby!!!! And not to mention my 2 precious gifts he left me with, my 2 boys joseph anthony and nicolas jose! And my oldest cedrick antonio! I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo extremely heart broken! I just want to die! I am only making it because of my kids, but I want to do nothing but curl up and die! I dont know how I am doing it but I am doing it for my kids!!!!!!! But I feel sad and lonely alll the time! Not only do I miss him but I FEELl it every second! I feel everything all at once! I am so overwhelmed with aNY TASKS BIG OR SMALL! COOK DINNER, CLEAN, CHANGE MY SONS DIAPER, BATH THE KIDS! i AM MAKING IT DAY BY DAY JUST DOING WHAT HAS TO BE DONE AND WHEN NIGHT TIME COMES I AM SOOOO HAPPY THAT I CAN SLEEP AWAY THIS AWFULL LIFE! My husband committed suicide and I found him! :( :( :( :( :(

Permalink Reply by Janice F. on September 20, 2012 at 10:02pm

Linda, I feel the same as you do.  I lost my husband almost 3 months ago, June 26.  I can't really tell you how I'm living with it, I just know I can't "move on", as some people are starting to tell me I need to do. They just don't understand.  You don't "move on", all you can do is learn to live with it, in time. I'm not there yet.  The grief is just overwhelming me.  I know how you feel, we who are here all know how you feel.   One day just follows another and I keep trying, small steps...

Permalink Reply by Marsha H on September 21, 2012 at 3:39am

Hi Linda ... My husband Ernie passed away April, 2011; I was almost 4 years older than him; married for 39 years and knew each other 45 years; we have no children; we were soulmates and very close; his parents have passed away and I am no longer in contact with his siblings for good reason; I only have one brother and his wife and two nephews. I blessed with good friends and neighbors.  I was shocked that some of the friends (couples) that Ernie and I knew for 30 - 40 years started to slip away and only a few remain behind.  I have made a couple of new friends.  I am still grieving over him (a wee bit better this year), but feel very exhausted some days and haven't really joined a church or volunteered yet until I know I can handle a proper routine.  I have a very close girlfriend and we walk the dogs; go for dinner, etc.  Still, life seems so empty without my Ernie.  I think the loneliness is the worst.  We can keep as busy as we like all day, but we still have to face being alone in our homes.  I do understand that some of us like to be alone sometimes, but perk up when someone visits or family comes over.  I am still not in good shape to have the social type of life Ernie and I had at our home or go to friends home for special occasions as I feel like a fifth wheel.  I don't push myself and will know when I am ready.  Oh yes, I cry off and on too.  Grief can hit anytime or anywhere without warning.  You are not alone Linda for most of us have gone through what you are going through and still going through some rough times.

God Bless

Marcy   

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