I´m a new member on here and I´ll be happy to share with others feeling tremendous pain and grief.It´s been not long ago and it still hurts.It was the last time I saw my beloved man early in the morning,smiling,kissing and talking to one another unforgettable words full of undying love.3 days later the phone rang.It was his brother telling me:"Jan is dead."My heart broke into small pieces,even now the tears are falling from my eyes.At that moment I was speaking to my beloved Jan,telling him everything from the bottom of my heart,desperately crying and hoping he does hear me,and he did.After hour rang a message from my mobile,so I entered the room we were sleeping 3 days ago to see and the sender was my beloved Jan,but message was empty.I think he was there while I was crying in the kitchen and let me know this way,so I entered the bedroom and at that moment I got the most beautiful evidence of his immortal love,because on the sheet of my bed was engraved a big heart.I´m sure he´s been by my side all the time,helping me hold on my way to home he´s waiting for me to come.I had to make a picture to believe it wasn´t just a dream.I found a place where I can say a few words for my beloved deceased,so I created my Memorial book dedicated to my beloved Jan.I can recommend everyone who is suffering and wants to do something for his beloved deceased person he´s thinking of.
Thanks a lot for reading these words and everyone who has an understanding heart.
I need to get to know those people which experienced a loss of beloved man or woman.
I send to all of you the warm greetings from Slovakia.

Janka

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Replies to This Discussion

I am so sorry for your loss. It's so wonderful Jan found a way to let you know he is okay and he loves you. I believe our loved ones that pass stay awhile to help us through our grief. Many of us on this site have had messages from beyond the grave. It confirms there is life after this life. His spirit is still alive.



Jan said:

I am so sorry for your loss. It's so wonderful Jan found a way to let you know he is okay and he loves you. I believe our loved ones that pass stay awhile to help us through our grief. Many of us on this site have had messages from beyond the grave. It confirms there is life after this life. His spirit is still alive.
Dear Jan!
Thanks for your kind words!Today I went to the church that me and my beloved Jan were going in.After the mass just ending up I went to see the relic of Saint Reparatus from the 4th century I had been visiting with my beloved Jan,hand in hand speaking to him as a patron of the love of us two listening to our prayers.I must remark that we had always been heard.I strengthened with those memories never stopped going there to talk to him about my beloved Jan,always begging for him,for both of us,again and again.This evening I did it too,coming to him with my prayers.I said:"If you only could do a miracle for me,please!" Then I went home,lit up a candle and took a seat to my laptop.After 10 o´clock p.m. I suddenly felt a well known feeling of the loved one´s presence.I felt those goosebumps all over my body,couldn´t move and it was like the warmest embrace of my beloved Jan every time he came to me.It always feels the same and the tears are falling down by themselves,but I wasn´t sure because of my father´s birthday he had today.Then I looked at my display and at that moment have disappeared all of the messages until the year 2011,remaining just all of those sending in the year 2011 while was my beloved Jan alive.He let me know this way that it was him.Later were all of missing messages right back where they were before.I looked at my clock and it was at 10:30 p.m.
I´m sure it was the miracle I was begging for,there in the church.It touched me as deep inside as I couldn´t stop crying,even now the tears are falling from my eyes,but they are not those tears of sorrow,they are these tears of joy...

Do you believe in miracles? I do !

My dearest Jan,I love you...love you...I do...above all !!!

Janka

Hi Janka. my heart aches for you...so sorry for your loss!  I lost my beloved husband just a few years ago..feel,like you, very alone with my pain...it does help to communicate with people that can understand!!  I do feel at times very lucky to have experienced, as you have, unconditional love, which no money can buy!  Kind of unreal but a very good friend of mine is also from Slovakia by the same name...Yanka....thinking of you....

Margit



Margit Pearson said:

Hi Janka. my heart aches for you...so sorry for your loss!  I lost my beloved husband just a few years ago..feel,like you, very alone with my pain...it does help to communicate with people that can understand!!  I do feel at times very lucky to have experienced, as you have, unconditional love, which no money can buy!  Kind of unreal but a very good friend of mine is also from Slovakia by the same name...Yanka....thinking of you....

Margit

Dear Margit!

I enjoy having your friendship on here.Has it been three years already?So hard to believe!I´m so sorry for your loss,too!Our beloved ones give us the signs bringing a comfort in our life.They love us,too so much and every chance they get,they try to remind us.I´ve been learning to live and cope with my painful loss more than 1000 days and nights...in order to do not break down...to do not lose the common sense...to stand up each time and move on...I do it every day of my life because of my beloved Jan waiting for me in heaven.I´ll never stop crying for him.He is everything I´m living for every second of my life.I do visit his grave every month more than 3 years to be bringing him the most beautiful roses and I´ll always do for the rest of my life.There is all of my love in every stone...all of my tears in every lump of the ground...Do you know the feeling when a powerful surge of grief can overcome yourself so much that you suffer more than before and can´t stop crying though you try to?The bigger is the love,the bigger is the pain.Sometimes I wonder how can my heart stand so much pain...When two do become one as well as we two did,the loss is really devastating and some things don´t ever go back to where they were...When I feel it´s unbearable,I speak to myself that I´ll never see him dying,I´ll never lose him anymore,there will be no more death...Only happiness and love lasting forever...My beloved Jan still does mean everything to me and will always do!I´ve been writing to him,my own poems from the bottom of my heart,about 30 poems just for him...Step by step I´m gonna post it on here.The love may change everything and now I feel as one person,one part it´s my beloved Jan and another part it´s me,two hearts beating as one forever.He is everything I have,I believe in and I love till eternity...I know that one day we´ll be together again...

Hugs from Janka



Janka Huljaková said:



Margit Pearson said:

Hi Janka. my heart aches for you...so sorry for your loss!  I lost my beloved husband just a few years ago..feel,like you, very alone with my pain...it does help to communicate with people that can understand!!  I do feel at times very lucky to have experienced, as you have, unconditional love, which no money can buy!  Kind of unreal but a very good friend of mine is also from Slovakia by the same name...Yanka....thinking of you....

Margit

Dear Margit!

I enjoy having your friendship on here.Has it been three years already?So hard to believe!I´m so sorry for your loss,too!Our beloved ones give us the signs bringing a comfort in our life.They love us,too so much and every chance they get,they try to remind us.I´ve been learning to live and cope with my painful loss more than 1000 days and nights...in order to do not break down...to do not lose the common sense...to stand up each time and move on...I do it every day of my life because of my beloved Jan waiting for me in heaven.I´ll never stop crying for him.He is everything I´m living for every second of my life.I do visit his grave every month more than 3 years to be bringing him the most beautiful roses and I´ll always do for the rest of my life.There is all of my love in every stone...all of my tears in every lump of the ground...Do you know the feeling when a powerful surge of grief can overcome yourself so much that you suffer more than before and can´t stop crying though you try to?The bigger is the love,the bigger is the pain.Sometimes I wonder how can my heart stand so much pain...When two do become one as well as we two did,the loss is really devastating and some things don´t ever go back to where they were...When I feel it´s unbearable,I speak to myself that I´ll never see him dying,I´ll never lose him anymore,there will be no more death...Only happiness and love lasting forever...My beloved Jan still does mean everything to me and will always do!I´ve been writing to him,my own poems from the bottom of my heart,about 30 poems just for him...Step by step I´m gonna post it on here.The love may change everything and now I feel as one person,one part it´s my beloved Jan and another part it´s me,two hearts beating as one forever.He is everything I have,I believe in and I love till eternity...I know that one day we´ll be together again...

Hugs from Janka



Margit Pearson said:



Janka Huljaková said:



Margit Pearson said:

Hi Janka. my heart aches for you...so sorry for your loss!  I lost my beloved husband just a few years ago..feel,like you, very alone with my pain...it does help to communicate with people that can understand!!  I do feel at times very lucky to have experienced, as you have, unconditional love, which no money can buy!  Kind of unreal but a very good friend of mine is also from Slovakia by the same name...Yanka....thinking of you....

Margit

Dear Margit!

I enjoy having your friendship on here.Has it been three years already?So hard to believe!I´m so sorry for your loss,too!Our beloved ones give us the signs bringing a comfort in our life.They love us,too so much and every chance they get,they try to remind us.I´ve been learning to live and cope with my painful loss more than 1000 days and nights...in order to do not break down...to do not lose the common sense...to stand up each time and move on...I do it every day of my life because of my beloved Jan waiting for me in heaven.I´ll never stop crying for him.He is everything I´m living for every second of my life.I do visit his grave every month more than 3 years to be bringing him the most beautiful roses and I´ll always do for the rest of my life.There is all of my love in every stone...all of my tears in every lump of the ground...Do you know the feeling when a powerful surge of grief can overcome yourself so much that you suffer more than before and can´t stop crying though you try to?The bigger is the love,the bigger is the pain.Sometimes I wonder how can my heart stand so much pain...When two do become one as well as we two did,the loss is really devastating and some things don´t ever go back to where they were...When I feel it´s unbearable,I speak to myself that I´ll never see him dying,I´ll never lose him anymore,there will be no more death...Only happiness and love lasting forever...My beloved Jan still does mean everything to me and will always do!I´ve been writing to him,my own poems from the bottom of my heart,about 30 poems just for him...Step by step I´m gonna post it on here.The love may change everything and now I feel as one person,one part it´s my beloved Jan and another part it´s me,two hearts beating as one forever.He is everything I have,I believe in and I love till eternity...I know that one day we´ll be together again...

Hugs from Janka

My dearest Jan,

wish you the happiest heavenly birthday!You´ve become young forever as we had always been dreaming of.Your bright blue eyes are shining more than the stars above.You´re the ornament of heaven all along.You´re my best,my most beautiful,my only one for eternity!Every second of my life,every breath in my lungs,every tear in my eyes,every heartbeat belongs to you...only you...forever!You´re my everything!I love you...above all...even more each day!I kiss you from the bottom of my heart!

I will always love you!!!

Janka

My only one,my best,my most beautiful,my beloved Jan!

It´s been already 4 years now and it seems to be harder yet.I´m close to tears writing these words full of neverending love I feel for you forever,my sweetest honey,trying to do not make cry myself as I know that I couldn´t stop,again.You´re everything I have,I believe in and I love for eternity!

Please,don´t keep me waiting too long as you know that I can´t live without you.I hardly breathe through the pain I feel inside.Every day I wait for you to come,for the day you get back to me and hold me in your arms being as one forever.I can´t wait to be with you,my love,again.

There will be no more death...no more tears crying for you...no more pain throbbing in my heart.We´ll be together,my angel,again.

I´m all yours,with every beat of my heart,the happiest to be with you and loving you always...forever...for eternity!

I love you...above all...and always will!!!

Janka

11.11.2015

Dear Janka, hi I feel your pain , I lost my husband 28 months ago. I miss him more then ever, the pain is unbearable at times. God bless us all.



georgia said:

Dear Janka, hi I feel your pain , I lost my husband 28 months ago. I miss him more then ever, the pain is unbearable at times. God bless us all.

Dear Georgia!

Thanks for your kind answer!I do appreciate your words written from the heart.I´m sorry what you´ve been going through!I really do!This week is very sad...the leaves falling down full of amazing colours...the fresh air full of gleaming raindrops...as well as the last time spending with my beloved Jan.I like the autumn the most,but it makes me feel gloomy now.After he had died I saw the sky covered with mass of big clouds...the sun hidden behind...fallen fog all over...everything was dead...as well as myself inside.It´s been 4 years now...more than 1500 days and nights without him...as the time goes by I feel unbearable emptiness and loneliness...

My beloved Jan is irreplaceable for me forever!

I hope to hear from you again.Please,take care!

Hugs from Janka

My beloved Jan,

today belongs to your birthday,sweetest honey!I´ve brought you the most beautiful roses as I always do to you...There was such a rainy day here,but God has listened to my prayers and sitting at your grave I´ve felt a sunshine on my face and birds were singing all along...It was you who has brought the sunbeams to let me know that you´re always by my side...I was crying again...I couldn´t help it...You´re missed forever,dearest sweetheart!I went to church and praying a lot for you...I was very sad,sitting so quiet,telling God to hold us both close to him for eternity...because I can´t live without you...I´m crying now...please,forgive me the tears I cry...it hurts too much...I don´t want to make you sad...you´re my everything...I want to be with you in heaven...my immortal beloved...

Love you,adore you,need you...want to be with you as one again...give me your hand and we´ll never be apart...

Forever yours,
Janka

16.5.2016

Attachments:

Hello Janka,

I just read your very moving post from yesterday, your dear Jan's birthday. The sorrow and loneliness you so elegantly express brings tears to my eyes. I share your pain with you, my sweet friend, and know that in another three years, when I will be without my Larry for four years, I will still feel as you do - thank you for sharing your innermost feelings of the truest forever love you have for Jan - and I know he has the same eternal love for you. I believe one day we will be with our lost loves, but until then we can only do our best to take care of ourselves, and each other.

You are in my thoughts and prayers, dear Janka, and I send a warm hug your way.

Love,

Chuck

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