Grief support groups, condolence advice, funeral etiquette and more
A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.
Latest Conversations: 8 hours ago
This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.
Started by Andrew Berenyi Jr.. Last reply by Steve Jul 14.
Started by Chris Sky. Last reply by Mary. Jane Jul 1.
Started by Sandfly. Last reply by Marsha H Jun 6.
Mary, and everyone else, thank you for taking time out to talk with me. This is completely all new to me. I hope I never ever have to go through it again. The emotions and just everything in general is the worst, sometimes almost crippling. When you do finally get some happiness, the guilt creeps in and tears you apart more. I commend all of you for how strong you are, and how wonderful you all are as well. Thanks again for all of your insite, I knew what was logical in my head, but sometimes my emotions don't run with logic. The man I lost is.. there are no words for it. I got off work late one night and he was going to a buddies house for the evening and we hadn't seen each other all day; he calls me and tells me to meet him at county line road just so we can hug before I went to sleep that night. Sitting at my desk at work and I just cry (good thing for cubicles lol). I've been doing an amazing job at keeping myself busy, work work work, gym, nieces on the weekend, but the pain still finds a way to creep up: driving home alone at night, falling asleep, shower. I wanted to get a memorial tatttoo as well, but a lady who is like my 2nd momma asked me to wait a year before doing anything like that, so that's what I am doing. And I suppose I should apply the 'wait a year' before making any important decisions.
I really do appreciate you guys!!
Mary.Jane ... I'm truly sorry that you had that terrible reaction to cortisone and became deeply depressed. I can still the odd time get deeply depressed and all one can do is rest and either come on Legacy or, for some keep to oneself. You are tough girl, so hope you are feeling much better.
To follow up on Option B, I've now finished it and discovered that there is a huge online support group on Facebook. Just put in Option B and it will take you there. One of the most inspirational blogs is from Patton Oswald whose wife died a year ago in her sleep at 40 something years old. He's a really good writer and I think that most of you would like reading not only his words, but what others have commented on.
Gretchen ... So good to hear from you. Not much going on just outside of Vancouver, B.C. where I live with the exception that we have a lot of cold, rainy days and the very few days we get with a little sun it torments us by going behind clouds and the weather can turn nasty in a Nano second. Planting will be late, but I managed to get out in my gardens one day and really worked up a fever doing as much as I could.
April 27 was the 6th anniversary of Ernie's passing and I found this year that I just didn't want to celebrate it. Of course I do love him, miss him with all my heart, but the reality is he isn't coming back so no reason to celebrate. I only celebrate our wedding anniversary and Christmas.
Like most of us have ups and downs and little by little things are getting a wee bit better. I find after one has gotten over the intense grief (each person is different) I have certainly faced reality and tried to reinvent my life as best I can. It's sure not easy though.
Hope you are doing well and don't be a stranger.
Don't know if any of you have read it yet, but I highly recommend Option B by Sheryl Sandberg. I'm about 3/4 of the way thru and find it very helpful. She addresses pretty much everything that we all have gone thru, are going thru or will go thru.
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