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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

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Started by David Heggi. Last reply by David Heggi Apr 10. 4 Replies

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Comment by Sara Murphy on January 13, 2018 at 1:54pm

Today is the 2 yr anniversary since I lost everything.  My life ended the day I lost Ken. 

I see some posts about visitations and I wish I would have a strong visit from Ken although I did have 2 very quick ones.  First was within a week of his death when I heard him say "hi".  It was about 5am and I heard it enough that I moved my head towards it to see who was there.  The second was a few weeks later, again early morning, when I heard him say "heeey yooou" so long and drawn out as he was trying to get his voice to break through the dimensional walls.  He opened our bedroom door and I sat up and he bent down and we hugged each other.    How I wish I would see him again.

Comment by Michele on January 13, 2018 at 12:49pm

I have been mostly quiet here, and find it very comforting to read how others deal with their grief.  I would like to mention that when my grandfather passed, of course I was very young his spirit came to me bedside and I found it very comforting; definitely a visitation.  It is almost two years that my husband passed and I wish he would visit.  I miss him dearly.

Comment by Mary. Jane on January 13, 2018 at 9:17am

That is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. THankyou..

Comment by David Heggi on January 12, 2018 at 11:18pm

It is personal, Mary Jane, but I'm not afraid to share it: it was a Divine visitation, I was at the lowest point in my life; I prayed, I cried,.I called out for help, and then there He was, all aglow in ethereal white, standing only a few feet away from me.  I will never forget the pure unconditional love that He emanated. He was real; He is real - I'll never forget it ,  The love...

Comment by Mary. Jane on January 12, 2018 at 8:51pm

David, I.  would love to hear about your experience, if you wish to share. But, I also know that it is a completely personal thing, and perhaps should stay that way.

Comment by Mary. Jane on January 12, 2018 at 6:36pm

Thank you, all for your sweet comments. I wish with all my heart that you all would receive a visit. I am so happy to have been so fortunate..I only wish we could have spoken. I have been praying for this since he died. 

Oddly, I don,t remember much of any of my dreams that occur at night and I am wondering if medication I take at night could have blocked any dreams that I might have received earlier..I don,t seem to have trouble dreaming or remembering my dreams during an afternoon nap..

Comment by Christine Blaire on January 12, 2018 at 12:04pm

Mary Jane, how very fortunate you are!  Even if we never have an experience like you have had we should all be encouraged that we will be with our loved ones in heaven! Your experience gave me some peace! Thank you so much for sharing! I can't wait to be with my Marshall! Thank you thank you!

Comment by deborah peck on January 12, 2018 at 11:16am

Mary Jane, I think on here everyone should feel free to express their feelings, that is what this sight is for, not to be judged,

Comment by Mary. Jane on January 12, 2018 at 7:14am

David! Thank u so much for responding. It was the first thing I read this morning, as I got up at 6am for a Dr visit, and opened my iPad to see if anyone would/had, as the silence of no response was devastating..The people here and their feedback at Legacy means so much to me. In a sense, that experience was almost like loosing him again...and the inability to communicate was horrible. But I know he is ok...but the sadness in his eyes...I expected joy, and calm...ok I am rattling on again...

but the thoughts and suggestions and support of everyone at Legacy is my lifeline, and I thank you again for your response. 

Comment by David Heggi on January 12, 2018 at 5:52am

You were not unable to relate, Mary Jane.  You verbalized your feelings as you experienced them.  No matter what anyone may think or say, it was real.  I had a similar experience.  Mary Jane, do you realize what a breakthrough this was for you personally?  Most of us can only wish, hope and pray to see our loved ones again.

And you did not overstep any boundaries here.  You have been very fortunate.  It should help you to reconcile your loss of Bob

 

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