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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

Members: 1376
Latest Conversations: Jul 17

This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

Peace

Discussion Forum

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31. 13 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019. 5 Replies

Finding the new normal

Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24, 2019. 12 Replies

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Comment by Steve Cain on September 21, 2009 at 9:32pm
I would like to say welcome to all of those who have joined us here in the group. I also offer my deepest sympathies. Three months ago today I lost my soul mate. To those who are wondering will it get better, I can't say I know. I will advise you to surround yourself with family, friends and coworkers that understand you. I am fortunate in that Kris and I worked at the same place so we had the same friends and they have been very supportive
To those who are looking for other support, contact your local hospice. Many have volunteer support people that will meet with you as the one I have. They may also offer support groups. I will be starting one next week.
Finally, do not let anyone tell you how you should feel or react to anything. Your emotions are your own and they are right for you. Please keep in touch.
Comment by Yaca Attwood on September 21, 2009 at 11:43am
No one cares - my husband died on 29 June 2009, and I cannot find any support groups, or anyone who cares at all - noone, nobody nothing. So, I will just cry alone, all by myself
Comment by Sharon Stricklen on September 21, 2009 at 11:18am
Hello this comment is for susan who just lost her partner of 4 years. Susan it will be rough for awhile but each day will be a little better. My husband died of cancer in april of this year and i watch him go it was very difficult and i miss him terriably but each day seems a little brighter then the last so hang in there and if you need to chat i am here
Comment by Lupe on September 9, 2009 at 3:56pm
hello my name is lupe and ive recently lost my husband to a 2 & half year battle to cancer of the throat. He was a smoker for 43 years he says. he went home on Aug, 29th 2009 that was the day our pain just began. it has been extremely painful losing him,. he was everything to us, made us completely happy with the simplest things he did. He was thoughtful, loved spending time with us, camping, hiking, going to the beach at Morro Bay was his favorite spot. I dont know how to go on, but i know we will.
Comment by Christine on September 8, 2009 at 12:44am
Hi i lost my husband last year 11th Dec 2008. He succumbed to lung cancer. We had four children aged 5, 4,3,11mths.He was a non smoker, non alcoholic. By the time he presented it was in the third stage and advancing fast. somethings wonder why this happened. Every month form 9th -12 i have a low mood and always crying. I can not understand why. I will keep my faith in God to give me the answer. I look at our young children who do not understand a thing. All they know is there dad died.

Christine
Comment by robin s bridge on August 29, 2009 at 12:15pm
Today it is 29th august and my dear wife succumbed to cancer on 20th august just before my brothers birthday and to boot it was 2 days before her sisters birthdat so I suppose that she wont forget that in a hurry .
We are now preparing for the funeral
that is all I can add at the moment
Robin
Comment by Jan on August 20, 2009 at 11:16am
At 11:12am on August 20th, 2009, Jan said…
I would just like to say that I too have had a terrible loss to our family ... but it has been almost four years now and at times it still seems like yesterday ... the pain dulls but never goes away ... and losing my husband to a seven year battle with a brain tumor was a double-edged sword for both myself and our children. Through it all, we never had hospice or counseling for his illness because my husband did not believe he was going to die and we stood strong with him but in his absence we miss him as everyone misses their loved ones when they are no longer here physically. I would also like to say that before my husband passed I spent some time talking with him ... we did have through those seven years many ups and downs ... but in the end there was no greater love for a human being than what he had for us and what we had for him. He was human and wished he could have done things differently but regardless, he knew we were there for him through everything. Everyday, I remind our three children, who were 18, 17 and 14 when he passed, that he is still here with them and always will be a part of them and everything they do. His spirit and soul will help guide them and they will always have a guardian angel on their shoulder. We all have angels who go before us and it is painful ... but we have to try to look for the bright side and find them in everything we do that is good. That is what they would want for us ... I am sure of that ... I tell my children to be strong and the best they can be because they will make their dad proud. They are wonderful children and I am proud of them as well ... God Bless Everyone and may you get the strength and support you need each and every day! Delete Comment
Comment by robin s bridge on August 18, 2009 at 12:50am
hello I am going through the process of being bereaved at the moment, my darling wife whom had been with me for the past 32 years is now dying of cancer
she was admitted to the hospice last thursday and now I keep on weeping!
no 2 weeks ago my sister was down here lasat week and now the consultant says there is no more hope
any suggestions what I can do.
I am still a young man
My eldest sister died of cancer in 1998 and my mother died in 1962,
what next? I ask myself
Comment by Frannie Manzoni on August 16, 2009 at 10:59pm
I lost my husband in Nov. 2008. I joined a bereavement group called HOPE. They are in New Jersey. Specifically for widows and widowers. They are helping me go on.
Comment by Doreen Johnson on August 16, 2009 at 2:39am
I think most of you have experienced your losses more recently than I. I lost my husband Dec. 13th, 2005. I have not approached any grief counseling or groups. I guess I mostly have just focused on getting up and doing what I have to to support my daughter and I. My daughter is 24....an only child, quite a "daddy's girl", and is Bipolar and also fights depression and anxiety. She is unable to work, and I also take meds for depression and anxiety from even before my husband died. It's hard for me alone to provide for us both, and she has no medical coverage so is existing without the benefit of the meds she took in the past.

Maybe I'm letting myself stay stuck in this spot. I have lost a few close relatives...but as much as that hurt, losing my husband hurts terribly. We were together over 23 years....I don't know how to be just me, let alone try to help my daughter to have a life.
 

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