Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.


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New Member

Started by Susan. Last reply by Marsha H Sep 2. 5 Replies

Lost my husband

Started by Mary Clough. Last reply by Marsha H Sep 2. 99 Replies

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Comment by janeo on July 15, 2012 at 11:25am
Karen, the shock will still be there. The question why will be there cause there will never be answered but i can tell you you will feel a little better after day by day. It's one baby step at a time It's still new and raw but everyone on thishere site will be here for you every step you make whether It's a better day or bad just know we care for you and how you feel. Prayers and peace for you. Today is going to be a good day smile and laugh at the stupid and funny things you did together that helps for a little while.
Comment by Faith J. on July 15, 2012 at 2:52am

Thx for the support. I really appreciate it.

Comment by Karen Ball on July 15, 2012 at 12:40am

Deb, Thank you so much for your eloquent explanation. It's what I was trying to say but was to emotional to put properly. I'm at the point where I'm bouncing between pain, anger and a bit of numbness and I don't know which emotion is going to surface next. All I know is that I miss my husband and I don't like it when people are cruel to someone already in pain. I'm so glad there are people like you around who have sage and sable advice to give.

Comment by Deb W on July 15, 2012 at 12:25am

Faith, I am going to hug you (((((Faith)))).  Sometimes, there are people who don't feel good about themselves and they say words that are meaningless and untrue but hurtful to others, it is only because they are hurting and not feeling good about themselves and they lash out at others to hurt them because they are hurting, you must know you did nothing wrong to have caused your husband's passing.  Perhaps this person was jealous of the love your husband and you shared because this person never experienced such a beautiful and ever-lasting love.  You are love, you are kind and all things beautiful and you know right now and at this time, the truth is your husband and you shared a love like no other and you both cherished one another.  That is what is important the ever-lasting loving memories you shared together and for that person who seems so insensitive, slam the door on them and lock it shut.  It is time now for You and to think positive and loving thoughts.    

Comment by Karen Ball on July 15, 2012 at 12:06am

Cruel doesn't begin to describe it. Someone who would take a shot at someone who is already swamped with grief is very low indeed. It makes me angry just thinking about it. Don't take it to heart, because whoever said it was just trying to be hurtful to make them feel better about their own life. Don't give them the satisfaction of seeing you down. You did nothing wrong.

Comment by Faith J. on July 14, 2012 at 11:45pm

Well, when I got home I found oit someone 'close' to me told my play nieve that I lost my husband due to a horrendous mistake I made when I was 19 or 20. That his loss was karma. All I could of was incredibly cruel & unecessary. Thry knew it would het back to me. Now I can't seem to stop crying. It's hard enoigh that I loss my husband, but to have to deal w/ this on top of it seems surreal. 

Comment by Karen Ball on July 14, 2012 at 11:29pm

There is no rhyme or reason, and we are left to pick up the pieces.  I'm sorry that you had such a tough time heading home. Just remember one breath at a time one step at a time and come here when you need to vent or some encouragement. My prayers are with you. I hope you have a better day tomorrow.

Comment by Faith J. on July 14, 2012 at 10:56pm

Back from Vegas. The closer it got to time to come back & then the closer we got to home, the worse I felt emotionally & physically. Finally totally broke down while looking over some paperwork.  I HATE that he's gone. Way too yoing, but then I just saw on the news where this seemingly healthy young man, working on Pres. Obama's campaign in Chicago, just died of a heart attack. Looked like he was in his 20's. No rhyme or reason to this.   :'-(

Comment by Karen Ball on July 14, 2012 at 12:11am

Hello all I just wanted to check in and tell everyone that my prayers are with you. The Past 2 days have been pretty peaceful and relaxing. Then again I did my best to hide from the world. I'd had a very difficult first part of the week and decided to have a vacation for the past 2 days. I watched some shows that Todd and I enjoyed watching together, made a nice cool strawberry shortcake and just reveled in happy memories. Now that my batteries are recharged a bit I can face another week. I hope you all have a good week. Take care & hugs. Karen

Comment by Mac on July 13, 2012 at 9:04am

Deb I am so sorry for your loss I wish I could wave a magic wand and make everything alright now. we try to think of good and positive things to keep everyone going sometimes it does help and other times it just looks like words in a book. I am glad you found this site it is a blessing to be able to come here and say whatever pops into our heads/hearts I will be praying for you and I am so sorry for your loss we can lose our parents, siblings, but when we lose our soul mates I can't imagine a hurt being any deeper and painful than this. Jean 


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