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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

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Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Bonny Jones Jan 22. 12 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

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Comment by Joan on May 25, 2010 at 11:05am
This is to Kathy Obiedzinski:
I take a 50mg of Diphenhydramine HCI, which translates into Benedryl, which makes you drowsy. I also have a glass of wine. In about a half hour to an hour, I'm ready for bed and sleep. It's safe for heart patients. I have hypertension and I've been taking this for years. I get mine in Walmart under the Equate brand and they're called Sleep Aid Liquidcaps. Ask your doctor about taking this. It's safer than any sleeping pill on the market. You can always eliminate the wine. I hope this helps. Joan
Comment by Marlena on May 25, 2010 at 9:31am
Kathy,
Your card is absolutely perfect. Thanking you for sharing it with us.

As far as sleeping goes, I try not to take anything (ok, once in a while, thank goodness for advil pm), but I don't go to bed till I am absolutely exhausted. That way my body has no choice but to sleep. I don't sleep as long as I used to, but I'll take the few hours I do get.
Comment by Mary on May 25, 2010 at 9:27am
To Kathy, have you tried splitting the Simonix in half, if a whole one helps you sleep but you can't get up in the morning this may work for you. It is worth a try. You can get a pill splitter from any drug store and it is easy to do. Good luck Mary
Comment by Randolph L. Schrader on May 25, 2010 at 9:16am
To Kathy, if you have a personal physician, work with him on a sleeping aid. I have a good one but nothing helps me sleep. I get too many side effects from all that I have tried and it is not worth it. After 13 months and 9 days I still wake up in the middle of the night.I wake up the exact time I left the hospital after my wife was pronounced dead. Wow, isnt that a continuing memory for me to bear. I wish you well on getting something to help you sleep. Hug to you.
Comment by charlotte bannon on May 25, 2010 at 7:18am
hi kathy,first of all i didn't feel hurt at all with the card "i love you, because", in fact it is beautiful, and glad you shared it with us. keep in touch , charlotte b.
Comment by Yvonne on May 24, 2010 at 12:25pm
Today one year ago my Larry went back to our home 5 hours away from the lodge to be with his mother who had broken her hip in a fall. She decided she was going to lay around and get all the pity she could and ended up being in the hospital for almost 3 months. Larry felt obligated to stay with her as he is the only child. I am still so angry about that. She took him away from me for 9 1/2 weeks. Larry came back to the lodge July 30 and passed away suddenly August 9. I feel so cheated. He was so lonely at home and I was so lonely here. I sometimes think it was Gods way of preparing me to be alone, but I still feel so cheated to not have had those 91/2 weeks. It seems so unfair. Hugs to all.
Take care Yvonne
Comment by Yvonne on May 24, 2010 at 11:38am
Hi Deb
I am sorry for your loss. These firsts are so hard. Just another brick in the road, that seem to weigh so heavily upon us. Happy birthday Junior. Hugs Deb.
Comment by BoLynn on May 24, 2010 at 2:04am
Today was a good day and I'm so surprised. I usually cry on Sundays because Bo left me on a Sunday. Family kept me busy today and that helped a lot. May God Bless us all with his love and give us strength to go on.
Comment by Deb on May 23, 2010 at 11:57pm
Today is going to be a tough one - May 24 would have been my Junior's birthday. His first birthday since his passing in June 2009; another "first" . . they are so hard!! I miss him as much now as I did 11 months ago. I know none of asked to be widows/widowers . . and I have asked "why?" so many times. Life has changed so very much-I am still not accustomed to the new "normal" in my life. God bless each of you. Please keep me in your prayers today.
Comment by Jennifer Preston on May 23, 2010 at 11:04pm
This is Jennifer Preston,I've had a good day today,I still miss My Pete,but I can't bring my sweet husband back,but one day I will see him again.I don't like being a Widow,but I am.God Bless all of you.
 

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