Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.


Discussion Forum

Finding the new normal

Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24. 12 Replies

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Bonny Jones Jan 22. 12 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Bonny Jones Jan 16. 4 Replies

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Comment by Joyce F. on May 13, 2010 at 3:47pm

It has been 65 days since my Donald passed away, and some days are better than other's, but what you are going through with you his family is crazy, I pray that God will continue to give you strength to deal with Kelly's passing and he will take care of those ruthless family members...prayer changes things!!!
Comment by Deb on May 13, 2010 at 3:36am
I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost the love of my life June 20, 2009. Most of the folks on this website know exactly the feelings that you are having and can relate very well. I have found that it does help just to share your thoughts here. Please feel free to write me any time. This is a very hard time for me - my guy's birthday is May 24, and the first anniversary of his passing is June 20. Take care of yourself. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. God bless and keep you!
Comment by Tammy on May 13, 2010 at 2:28am
I just lost Kelly, he was the Love of my life~~ It has been 2wks and 5days today. I feel so very alone, his family wont bother with me except for what they think they are going to come take from me...which as they put was everything but his underwear!! How hurtful that day was. I have alot of anger built up in me at family and his family and the crew that was called on seen...they did nothing!! I am hurt, scared and angry..please help me find friends that can take me through some of this..God Bless you all. MY BABY I LOVE YOU ALWAYS AND 4ever
Comment by Peg Otley on May 12, 2010 at 10:02pm
Thanks Tom,
Believe it or not I am an organ donor!!! Don't know what they'll be able to use when the time comes but I won't change it. I DO have children and family who have been wonderful through the last 5 months. I know they want to help but I feel so guilty since they have families to take care of too. I will TRY to do what I can by myself and then I will contact the hospice that helped Harry. They were wonderful. Thank you for your support. It is much appreciated. I am still spinning in circles after losing Harry in Dec and then my Dad having been in the hospital 3x since that once with a stroke on Valentine's day, the day after his 80th b-day party. He has done well and is able to walk with and w/o his walker (even tho he isn't supposed to) :) He's stubborn. That's why he is still here. Guess I should try to be more like him and I'll do ok. I know the donor wants that but it will be bittersweet IF I'm even able to get an organ. The list is long I'm sure and the matches are few.
To make matters worse, our beloved Pittsburgh Penguins just lost the year! :) Ya gotta try to smile at something ha?
Comment by Peg Otley on May 12, 2010 at 8:57pm
Well once again I am faced with a "first". I had an esophagoscopy today and was told that I need a liver transplant. I had hoped this day would never come. I contracted Hepatitis C about 35 years ago and before they diagnosed it, it had done its damage. HOW IN THIS WORLD am I going to get through this without my Harry, my husband of 36 yrs????? My love of my life. I just don't know if I can do this. It also bothers me that someone will have to lose a loved one in order for me to live. I can't digest this. I don't know if I can do this. Any suggestions besides praying...already doing that.
Comment by kathleen caylor on May 12, 2010 at 9:04am
Lois,You know a few months ago,the phone incident would have been devastating.I guess this is a sign of recovery.As I read the entries of the new widows and widowers,I realize how far we have come.Some more than others.This site has been a Godsend!Only some one who has been through this ordeal could relate.So I would like to thank everybody for your support.
Comment by Carmen G Tajalle on May 12, 2010 at 1:22am
Reading each comment with those who lost a spouse. I too lost my husband John to Brain Anerism on July 8, 2007.

I identify with the process of grieving I'm encourage by those of you who open up and share your day to day struggles though as hard as it is I know I'm not alone....
Comment by kathleen caylor on May 11, 2010 at 10:38am
Just went through hubby's clothes.It wasn't as traumatic as I thought it would be.A few sniffs and hugs later and the dresser is done.Now the closet,I think that will be another day.My neck is a little tight.I think the anticipation of such things is worse than the actual chore.
Comment by kathleen caylor on May 11, 2010 at 7:29am
Lois,Right there with you and the tire iron!!!I see we share the same sense of patience!Yesterday I was waiting for a call from the a.c.service guy.who works for the company my husband worked for.He called ,but my cell phone said"ERNIE" I have never deleted his number!It seems the company gave this guy my husbands phone.All I could think was "wow" This carrier is GOOD!!!I was a little disappointed to hear someone elses voice!Just thought I'd share.
Comment by kathleen caylor on May 11, 2010 at 7:21am
Sandralee,Sorry for your loss.We all are trying to figure out how to go on without the love of our lives.You have my sympathy.this is a place we didn't want to come to.But thank God it's here.Find some peace in knowing you did your best!

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