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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

Peace

Discussion Forum

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31. 13 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019. 5 Replies

Finding the new normal

Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24, 2019. 12 Replies

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Comment by Bill Geddings on April 21, 2010 at 12:14pm
Life continues to be a struggle for me on a daily basis. It has been 9mths now and still feels as if it was yesterday. I'm trying so hard to get back into the rat race of life, but it too has been a struggle! I miss him so much. I've tried to date a few times but really wasn't into it. Everyone keeps telling me that I'm looking for Phillip in another person. Maybe I am but I also know there will never be another him. I guess I 'm just having on
Comment by kathleen caylor on April 21, 2010 at 7:40am
Tom,I asked a similar question on the discussion page in Feb.Regarding prolonging our misery.What I've seen is even though it's been a while for some of us,there is still the need to communicate when the need arises.Like Lois said 2-3 years to grieve.And lets face it we are all grieving.You can see for yourself the progress of some and others not so much.Bumps in the road!!But just like life we are all different.So is the way we're dealing with death.
Comment by judy on April 20, 2010 at 11:07am
Dear Tom, I also have a houseful... 9 cats a alittle pug named Stella..I set them all down the other day and told them they need to start looking for jobs, as it is getting harder to buy food!! Needless to say, they looked at me and walked away...... my husband loved each of them, they were so comforting to him.
Comment by judy on April 20, 2010 at 10:59am
I would like to thank, Sarah, SharonStrickland,Wendela,Ivaras, Pamela Thomas, and Marie, you all sent a reply to me in December, I never answered, Not because I didnt care ,I just had no more words left. Now, its April, and Im still heart- broken...Im going to a grief counsler, but I actually feel worse when I leave her office.. will I ever feel better? Day and night I long for Rich, he was my life, his love for me was constant, no matter what. I wish somebody could help me, Im so sad. Thanks for listening, Judy Latty
Comment by Yvonne on April 20, 2010 at 1:53am
You know Tom, I think you are right. Why would anyone want to hang around someone who is feeling sorry for themselves? It is very difficult for us to see beyond our grief, but as a friend told me, the world is still waiting for us and is still progressing. We can't allow ourselves to sit back and do nothing. Our loved ones would be ashamed of us if that is what we did. They would only want the best for us now as they did when they were with us.
Besides Tom you have 11 mouths to feed and all those stores to support!!! LOL
Comment by Diane on April 19, 2010 at 2:33pm
My husband passesd away January 6, 2009. I too, end up at the starting line in the grieving process. Sometimes, I think, wow, you've come along way. Then something happens and it starts all over again. Maybe because I didn't get the chance to ask him why.?? The only I dreams I have of him are nightmares. My youngest son and I have spent the last year fighting. He dropped out of school for a while. Why? Because he honestly believed that I was responsible for his dad dying. Anyways, I know I did not force my husband to become a meth user.

Guess I really don't understand.
Comment by Craig Cody on April 18, 2010 at 6:29pm
Feeling so lonely just want partner back so bad it hurts deep inside
Comment by kathleen caylor on April 18, 2010 at 2:01pm
What can I say?I feel like the most selfish person in the world!Juanita,Donna,You all have seen so much pain,I'm Speechless!God bless both of you.I hope the rest of your Journey gets better.But I know It isn't an easy road.Find some peace somewhere.
Comment by Juanita on April 18, 2010 at 12:57pm
almost 2 years my husband committed suicide with me
trying to pull the gun away. He died in my arms as I lowered him to the floor. Just can't get over it.
Comment by kathleen caylor on April 18, 2010 at 9:08am
Donna,What you had to go through,no one should!It sounds like what could go wrong,did.My husband died of sudden death.The autopsy revealed critical coronary atherosclerosis.I was so angry at him at first,thinking this could have been prevented with bypass surgery.But after reading your horror story,I feel "lucky" (if you can call it that)!Trust me when I say I would have made the same decisions you did,if I thought it would have bought us more time.The decision to live or die is NOT in our hands!!!The picture I carry with me is Doing CPR for 10 mins.waitng for EMS to arrive.Knowing he was gone and not wanting to give up.I hope you find some peace,Kathy
 

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