Grief support groups, condolence advice, funeral etiquette and more
A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.
Latest Conversations: Jul 6
This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.
Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31.
Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019.
Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24, 2019.
Kathy ... You are not abnormal at all for wanting your dear Joseph to be there to give you a big, secure hug. It is almost 4 years since my Ernie passed away and he was a big man so when he hugged me I always knew I was safe and felt so secure and I've gotten use to the fact that I'm a pretty fiery woman when someone does me wrong and realize just how much toughness I have in me. I will always miss those big hugs of his and his smiling face. I still have his work jacket and baseball hat hanging on the hook in the hallway as if by some miracle it's all a joke and he'll be coming home, but I know that's not reality, but it gives me comfort.
It is also normal Kathy that we look back and 'what ifs' or 'did I do things right' or 'could I have done more.' Take relief in the fact hon, you did it all right and it was just out of your control. These are all normal feelings when going through grief and most of us had them and can still have them.
Flashbacks are also common when it's a sudden death or even if you are watching your loved one die and as time goes on these will become much less intense.
You are by no means maudlin and it's important members on here who are in raw grief can express their doubts and fears with those of us who have gone through the gamut of raw grief. You will be just fine hon!
It's nice to know that friends on this site are thinking of us and wishing us all well. This forum/site really helps to keep me going; the support and understanding of you all is very important to keep us afloat.
I just arrived back home after being away with my family, and the shock of coming back to the empty house has too much. Everything here reminds me of my darling Joseph, but he is not here to greet me with his big smile and his tight hug. How I miss him!
So thank you to all for you for being here for all of us and for sending us messages of cheer and encouragement. I, too, am sending good thoughts your way.
Janeo ... You are always so sweet thinking of us and I for one thing of you and everyone else too.
I just wanted to say I'm thinking of all of you.
Barbara ... So well put! Sometimes I often wonder why God puts so many pressures on us and it seems never-ending. I went through a phase where I thought the Grim Reaper was parked at my doorstep. Every so often we see a small light of happiness and I know in time that light will get brighter and closer for all of us.
Renae ... Well! Cheeky or what? LOL Too bad your daughter wasn't with you when you saw the doctor and he could have blasted her out of her shoes. For most of us we grieve the loss of parents, other family members and sometimes friends, but how could one ever know the searing pain of losing a spouse. I was 4 years older than my husband so I always thought I would go first and still wish I had. Barbara explained grief and it's emotions so well and most of us go through all those emotions until we come to some type of peace in our lives.
You still have total control of your life and even though you are grieving kick some butt when it comes to your adult children and anyone else that feels you are being dramatic. You rule!
Know that we are here for you and we like to think on this forum that we are extended family and of course you are part of us so lean on us when you need too and we'll be sure to straighten out what is dramatic and what isn't.
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