Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

Members: 1371
Latest Conversations: 3 hours ago

This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.


Discussion Forum

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21. 5 Replies

Finding the new normal

Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24. 12 Replies

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Bonny Jones Jan 22. 12 Replies

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Comment by Carol Kayser on July 16, 2014 at 10:13pm

Jane P.  thank you, those words are beautiful and truthful and I appreciate reading them.



Comment by Carol Kayser on July 16, 2014 at 10:10pm

Dear Theresa, I;m sorry you fell and hurt your knee, I know that kind of thing can be scary and naturally it just triggers the feelings of being afraid, alone and sad:(  I am glad it wasn't so much worse for you. 

I have a good friend who lost her husband in March.  One of her chief things she said was she is so busy, that there is so much to do.  I asked her if she was making extra work for herself so she wouldn't have to be alone with her thoughts, because sitting alone and thinking is darnright scary and overwhelming for us.  It's a good thing to be busy, we all need to be productive and feel like we are contributing but I do believe there is a limit, which we should impose on ourselves.  We do need to take care of us during grieving and it sounds like you have placed so much pressure on yourself Theresa.  Did you ever go on that vacation/retreat you spoke about?  I think you need a few days just to relax and recoup.

Just my thoughts -  I will let Marsha weigh in when she can:)



Comment by Theresa Wimann on July 16, 2014 at 9:40pm
I hate this. I hate feeling helpless.
Comment by Theresa Wimann on July 16, 2014 at 8:25pm
Counsel me Marsha. You seem to do so well.
Comment by Theresa Wimann on July 16, 2014 at 8:23pm
I'm back. I thought that all the frenetic activity of summer was just what I needed to use some of this pent up energy. I come from a family whose idea of fun is...big surprise: work. So I've been working with the summer lunch program and visiting my mom and getting house stuff and back log work stuff done and setting up a farm market. Today I fell on my butt. Really, I did. I tried to do too much and my knee gave out and I landed on my posterior and I cried the whole way home because if I injure myself, there is no one to take care of me. On top of it, I used up all my sick leave time taking care of Bruce so there is no time for injuries or to be sick. So, what do I do? Fortunately I just wound up with cuts, scrapes and black and blue patches along with a little inflammation where I don't have a disk. I'm just totally freaked.
Comment by Marsha H on July 16, 2014 at 3:01pm

Jane P ...  Thank you for sharing that and I can sure relate.  I printed it out and it's on my fridge door in plain view where others can see it when they come to my home.  That should put a cap on any down comments.  LOL



Comment by Marsha H on July 16, 2014 at 3:00pm

Carol ...  Thanks so much and I am always happy to try help other members on here, but, in turn all of you help me too.  I feel so blessed having been part of everyone's lives on here be it sad or a few good times they may enjoy.



Comment by Marsha H on July 16, 2014 at 2:58pm

Steve ..  Thank you so much for your post, but most of all thank you for all your hard work setting up Legacy and helping people such as myself.  I don't think I would have made it without this site and all the wonderful members so I can't take full credit for forging ahead to counsel.  Jane P's fingerprint with that beautiful saying said it all and all I can do through counseling is help each grieving individual take one baby step at a time and lean on me until they get a foothold on life.  I have learned that grief is part of life and that there is no 'quick fix' and for me at least, grieving has humbled me and made given me more empathy towards others.

Thanks again Steve for all you've done and continue to do.


Comment by Marsha H on July 16, 2014 at 2:52pm

Chicago Beard ...  Thank you so much, but I couldn't have done it without the help of all of you.  I still remember you were the first person who answered my post shortly after my husband's death.  Thank you!



Comment by Chicago Beard on July 16, 2014 at 2:34pm

Marsha, you will be excellent as a counselor. Good for you!


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