Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.


Discussion Forum


Started by Julie. Last reply by DJ Dec 6, 2020. 1 Reply

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31, 2020. 13 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019. 5 Replies

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Comment by Steve G. on June 3, 2020 at 5:32pm

You do not have to log in, it is my personal blog titled

"All the people in my life"

Just scroll down till you find his story

Comment by Steve G. on June 3, 2020 at 5:27pm 

Look for story that Chuck wrote, titled

"What Am I Afraid Of"

To big for legacy. 

Comment by Steve G. on May 29, 2020 at 7:26am

Thank you Marsha, 

I love that quote, you always lift me up.

To my wiser sister in Canada, I love you.

To all the Angels on Legacy, I love you one and all!

Comment by Marsha H on May 29, 2020 at 6:36am

Dear Sara ...  I know just how you feel about Ken and I the same about Ernie.  Even after 9 years I still think of him often and all the special events we had celebrated together.  Now when there is one I just make a special dinner, light candles, have a wine and sit in the living room where we preferred to dine and raise my glass to a wonderful man.  I know these words don't help, but all of us here were so very lucky to have spouses we loved so deeply and deeper than the sea as so many people never experience that.  I am thinking of you and I know Ken must be very proud of you.



Comment by Marsha H on May 29, 2020 at 6:31am

Dear Steve ...

I was in tears my friend that you fear about the future.  Remember, throughout history whether it be impending war, terrorism or the threat of diseases they do pass and there is still a future.  So hold your head high, don't be afraid and when housebound I realize it's tough, but you are doing all the right things.  

Here is another passage from this wise lady you quoted:

Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space. Invite one to stay ...

Comment by Steve G. on May 28, 2020 at 11:24pm

Thank you Trina for your words of truth and comfort.

I have to remind myself that there are so many people around our world that are suffering in so many different ways.

Love and hugs to all

Comment by Trina Mamoon on May 28, 2020 at 7:50pm

Dear Chuck,

As you write, many of us here on this forum are always engaged in trying to find ways to distract ourselves from constantly focusing on our past lives with our departed spouse/partner.

It will be six years in August that Joseph left this planet, but everyday as I open my eyes, the very first thoughts are about him, and the very last thoughts as I try to force myself to fall asleep in the early hours of the morning are also about him. Thoughts of Joseph and of my past life with him, what it would be like now had he been around, are all I am thinking about. It's as if he lives inside of me, is at one with me, inseparable. When we have experienced a love that endures through death and endures through the years, this is how it is.

On a different note, about people's reaction to the pandemic, I would like to say that the pandemic has brought out the best in human nature and it has also brought out the worst in human nature; funny how that works. We know of people who are going above and beyond to save lives and putting themselves at risk, and at the same time, we see the horrific images of people who lack basic human decency and are protesting against having to wear face masks and do social distancing. You would think that people would want to do their part in this national/global crisis, and try to keep the number of COVID patients and COVID deaths lower, but no, for those people their personal freedom is more important than other people's right to live and to be healthy. Sad and upsetting, to say the least. But I feel cheered by the acts of altruism and kindness that strangers are showing strangers every single day through this hard time. There is hope for human nature yet. 

Sending love and good thoughts your way. Stay safe.

-- Trina

Comment by Trina Mamoon on May 28, 2020 at 7:13pm

Dear Steve,

Your post that is so honest about coping with loss and grieving in the time of Corona brought tears to my eyes. Yes, my friend, the uncertainty of it all makes it so much more difficult. Hope your reading keeps you busy and distracted so you do not dwell on your sad thoughts.

Sending hugs and love your way. Stay safe and stay well.

-- Trina

Comment by Trina Mamoon on May 28, 2020 at 7:10pm

Dear Sara,

Thinking of you and your beloved husband Ken today, your 31st anniversary. Anniversaries are always rough with our soulmates gone, but in these unprecedented times of social distancing and lockdown, any marker day is that much more difficult to bear. I hope you make it through the day with some amount of peace and that memories of your Ken bring you comfort today. 

Sending you love and hugs,


Comment by Steve G. on May 28, 2020 at 4:19pm

Dear legacy family,

I start each day lately with anticipation plus a measure of sadness.  I cannot put out of my thoughts that looming on the horizon is "what's next".  I find that meditation is helping to keep me grounded and still I wonder and still I plan small projects to distract my mind.  I read a lot about science and astronomy, anything for distraction.

Just needed to vent.

"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."  Maya Angelu...

Love and hugs



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