Caregiving for Caregivers

Who is there for us? When we are up 2,3, or more times with a family member during the night and all day too. We have to learn how to take care of ourselves in order to take care of others. We need to support eachother everyday, everynight.

Location: Niles, Illinois
Members: 43
Latest Conversations: Aug 1, 2015

Discussion Forum

What do I do now??

Started by Angelina Rael Smith. Last reply by Diamond Oct 8, 2012. 1 Reply

Hurt feelings--Am I too sensitive?

Started by Connie. Last reply by Connie Feb 29, 2012. 6 Replies

Is this the right group for me? Yes!!

Started by Connie. Last reply by Connie Dec 20, 2010. 9 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by Blair Alexandria Gorham on July 22, 2015 at 1:49pm

It's really hard giving care. Not because you don't want to but because it takes a great deal of strength. You give and give but sometimes forget to take care of yourself. Lamentations 3:55-57 has really helped me. God hears our prayers. Sometimes just crying to him makes me feel better. Throwing all my burdens on him so I can start anew and be ready for the next day that comes with its own burdens.

Comment by Theresa Wimann on April 15, 2014 at 7:34pm
My sister, my brother and I are caregivers for my mother with AlzhEimers. Don't get me wrong. We adore mom although she hasn't identified any of us in three years. She is in a CBRF where she gets excellent care but I miss my funny, sassy, laughing mom. She usED to light up the room and she made the world a better, happier place for many. Sometimes I wonder why her? Dad took care of her for many years until she began running away from home. He had Parkinson's but he sacrificed all to care for her. This month it is three years since he passed and three months since my husband passed. I need to find something fun to bring her for Easter. Any ideas? It am plum out.
Comment by Carlo Cacioppo on February 5, 2014 at 11:03pm

Janelle, such an awsome show of strength by you, so proud to know you, take good care and keep me posted how your doing.

Comment by Janelle on February 5, 2014 at 3:52pm
Being my mothers caregiver was the hardest yet most rewarding experience I ever had. It taught me the true meaning of compassion, dignity, patience, and love. There were many tears, and many times I didn't know if I could do it, but each day, and with the invaluable help of hospice I was able to keep my mother safe and happy, with me in my home . She was never alone or frightened, her pain was well controlled and we both thrived on structure and routine. I just wish I was able to "cure" and not just "comfort" it's very hard knowing it's going to end , I put my heart and soul into taking care of her, I did have to remind myself to take care of me as well, the hospice people were a wonderful help to me, and God was instrumental, always keeping an eye or lending a hand when I was ever overwhelmed or frightened . I honored my mother in her time of need. She was everything to me, and I would do it a hundred times over .
Comment by T.C. Goodwin on February 4, 2014 at 6:28pm

Being a caregiver is very difficult and can be very stressful especially when other family members do not step up to the plate. Kudos for all the caregivers out there. I know it's hard young and old. Your works do not go unnoticed to the one that matters the most. Try to think positive thoughts if you can (Philippians 4:8)

Comment by Carlo Cacioppo on December 9, 2012 at 9:41am

Lets all try to get through this holiday season by supporting eachother. I am here for you 24/7 if you need me.

Comment by Carlo Cacioppo on July 25, 2012 at 9:21pm

Gloria, debby and I got your email today and it looks like nothings changed for the better as far as your respite time away and the burden of your son's suicide still very fresh in your mind and your heart. Debby and I went through this not going anywhere and potential caregiver burnout and very little help thing for 8 years in a row from 2002 to 2010. What town do you live in or near where the local senior center could help out. Try calling your village hall senior services and they should have referral phone numbers you could call to get some help or at least info on where to call. Keep in touch.

Comment by Carlo Cacioppo on April 14, 2012 at 8:46am

Morning kathleen, so sorry to hear about your mom, it was a devastating time to relive all those memories but your mom as you know is no longer sick and with you dad again. Kudos to you for bringing her home where she wanted the end to take place, can we say its now, KATHLEEN'S TIME TO RELAX. Please take some time for yourself with walks and a little fun if you can and recharge yourself, be with friends. Keep yourself going in a positive direction, glad you are doing ok considering.

Comment by kathleen caylor on April 14, 2012 at 7:19am

Hi all,I haven't been on Legacy for a while.I lost my mom on 12/31/11.She initially got sick with CHF in Nov.and was hospitalized for 1 week and dicharged to a re-hab facility.After 3 weeks there I fought to get her home.Her main request was to die at home.She had been raised in an orphanage and didn't want to die in a nursing home.The least I could do was honor that wish.She remained active til 12/30,then took a sudden turn.So she went very quickly and peacefully.She died 2 weeks shy of her 94th b-day.Now she's with my dad.I may have complained before,but I sure do miss that ornery,old lady.I didn't realize what a blessing it was to have her in my home after the death of my husband.Now I'm feeling like I'm reliving his death all hers.Grief sucks.But it is the price we pay for love.Good luck everyone.Appreciate what you have.It won't last forever.

Comment by Carlo Cacioppo on April 13, 2012 at 6:14pm


Sounds like you have your hands full. My name is Debby and I am Carlo's wife. We have been caregiving forever it seems like, first my Mother then Carlo's Mother. The thing you have to remember is if you fall apart you will not do any good for anyone. It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking you are not important enough to take care of. I know you are probably exausted from constant caregiving, but you would be surprised how good a short walk can make you feel. Go to the park or the local zoo for your four hours, just lose yourself for awhile, you don't have to do anything, just being outside in the nice weather should help. Take some you time and go for a massage. Do whatever you used to enjoy. Write back if you need to talk, we check this site everyday, and we are hear for you to lean on. My sympathy for the loss of your son. God Bless you


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