Kathleen - no worries about venting. It's so nice to know someone else has one of "those people" in the family. I have to say my brother comes by it honestly. Both sides of Mom's family could squeeze blood from a stone, given the chance. My grandfather said of my grandmother, "Bessie's the only one in the family not born with a hatchet in her hand." So, yeah. I know your brother. Even if I've never met him, I know him.
I'm so sorry that he took everything she had! That's one reason I pushed Dad to make very difficult decisions now - because we didn't with Mom and it burned us all terribly. It will continue to until all of the medical bills are settled - over a half a million and counting. She woudn't have wanted that, but without a directive from her, the neurologist telling us she had a very good chance, and her showing us she wanted a chance, our hands were tied. But because of hopsital screw-ups, she remained on a vent for 4 months rather than a couple of weeks.
So now I'm his POA and the house is in all 3 childrens' names, and written so that no 1 of us can sell his/her share without consent and first refusal by the other 2.
I just got back from getting some medicine, so am tired and more than a little dizzy.
Thank you, Kathleen. it's so good to not be alone!