howdy. I lost my grandma a weeks ago. She died slowly which gave me time to say goodbye and everything but is bittersweet because she was abused and neglected in her final weeks at her place of care. Although it is hard, compared to the sudden loss of my mother from suicide it is less intense. I am glad her pain is over but I would also give my inheritance and my car to have her back here in good health. People say that makes me selfish but there not going through it. You will heal but time doesnt heall all wounds it took me about a year to get up from my mothers blow. There are still some triggers of certain songs, movies smells that bring up emotion with my mother as well as grandmother, but I find comfort in the fact that there together and waiting for me. People tell me shes in a better place, she wouldnt want to see you like this, I'm being selfish, but there wrong. you grieve however you deem necessary and need to do. Don't let anyone tell you need to stop being a wuss.