Gay and lesbians who have lost partners


Gay and lesbians who have lost partners

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Looking for people who can understand my loss

Started by Amanda. Last reply by Amy Bartola Sep 3. 10 Replies

Hello, my name is Amanda. I lost my partner over 3 years ago. It was a sudden and unexpected loss. I'm still grieving and struggling with it. I came on here hoping to find people who could understand…Continue


Started by April Fiorillo. Last reply by Care Johnson Feb 21. 2 Replies

Lost my ex girlfriend to cancer and a brain aneurysm and it burst. Was with her many years, having a very hard time moving forward. You see she called me and died on the phone while we were talking,…Continue

Another Excellent Group is now on Facebook

Started by Robert Davis. Last reply by Pauline Overton Nov 4, 2018. 2 Replies Last year, one of the folks here, Niel, was looking for a more responsive and easier…Continue

He saved me - now he's gone who will save me now?

Started by robert j crowley. Last reply by Pauline Overton Nov 4, 2018. 20 Replies

I already know the textbook answer is that "I must save myself."  So for me those text book answers seem so impossible.  in June of 2007 I met Richard - and we were never apart until he passed on…Continue

Tags: alone, desperate, Lost

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Comment by Don Griffith on September 30, 2019 at 12:39pm

Graham, welcome. I, too, had a series of unexpected illnesses at a time when I should have been grieving my husband of 36 year. I think profound grief destroys your immune system. I got multi-local pneumonia, klebsiella, sepsis, c-did from the antibiotics for all the other stuff. My best advice to you sounded trite when I heard it, but be kind to yourself. Don’t hold yourself to anyone else’s timeline. And let yourself mourn. There is a direct correlation between the depth of your love and the depth of your grief. Good luck to you. It hurts like hell, but you will come out the other side.

Comment by Graham Baskerville on September 30, 2019 at 12:18pm

Thanks for letting me join this group. My partner died suddenly & unexpectedly on March 6th this year. I literally found him lying dead on the floor early that morning when I got up to get ready for work at a local hospital. Despite efforts to revive him it was all clearly too late. A post mortem revealed his death was due to unknown heart issues. About 10 days later I was rushed into hospital with bowel issues (I suffer with adhesions on my bowels) that required emergency surgery. Following surgery I had complications due to dehydration & low levels of sodium & potassium that in turn triggered serious & life threatening heart issues. This made it beat far too fast & assume an abnormal rhythm: atrial flutter mode. Just for good measure I also had sepsis & my blood pressure & temperature were much too high. I was allowed out of hospital the day before my dear partners funeral & despite still feeling very unwell I managed to attend. I have been slowly picking up the pieces of my shattered life & trying to go forward. Work has helped me a lot but I still find it very tough & breaking down into tears. In short, I am still emotionally very fragile though other tell me I am doing very well. I live in a remote part of the UK & have limited access to local gay friends. I hope to move (perhaps next year) & it was something my partner & I always planned to do. It would be good to hear from anyone in a similar situation & hopefully reach out & make some new friends.  

Comment by Daniela Andrino on August 13, 2018 at 12:40pm
Hi, everyone, I'm here to share my testimony all around the globe in respect to the help that Doctor Zakuza did for me. I was devastated and confused when I got divorced by my husband 2 years ago because he wanted to go back to his mistress. I searched for help from those that i knew but all was to no avail not until i was directed to Doctor Zakuza the spell caster. I contacted Doctor Zakuza and told him everything that I've been going through and he gave me full assurance that he will help me. I did everything he told me to do and I put my trust and hope on him. Could you believe that my husband came back to me pleading within 12 to 16 hours just as Doctor Zakuza told me after i contacted him and now, my husband is back home and we are living together again. I will recommend anyone in need of help to reach him now for he's also specialized in money spells, lottery spells, pregnancy spells, sickness spells E.T.C. Email: & Whats-app, call/text him on +1 (845) 400-7115.
Comment by Kathrin Guss on May 8, 2018 at 10:47am

I will forever be indebted to the great Doctor Zakuza for fixing my broken marriage after my husband left me for his mistress for 6 months. I never believed in spells until my friend introduced me to him. At first, I was skeptical about him because I heard a lots about false spell casters but I put my doubts behind me for i was desperate to get my husband back and I did according to what he instructed me to do. Now my husband is back just within 48 hours of contacting him. I'm living happily with my husband again after 6 months of divorce and I will not rest till he's known all over the world. He's also specialize in money spells, lottery spells, sickness spells E.T.C. Get connected with Doctor Zakuza now, his email is or WhatsApp on +1 (845) 400-7115

Comment by JAMES WOODARD on April 27, 2017 at 2:10pm

Thanks to all of you for the heart felt words.  I will definitely visit the FB group.

Comment by Charles E. Nelson on April 26, 2017 at 8:41pm

Hello James,

I am so sorry for your loss of your beloved Mark. I lost my husband Larry two years ago April 22. Today I visited the plot where his ashes are interred for the first time in these two years, and was feeling quite emotional and unsettled tonight when I saw your post. It feels as if I was supposed to see it and tell you something - and I feel like this is dearest friend6 months after I lost Larry, said the same thing to me that is being said to you by those who love you, are worried, and just don't know how to help. For them it's that feeling helpless that makes them pray for you to find some peace and support someplace. I believe their prayers were answered when you found Legacy, just the way I did 18 months ago.

There is so much I want to say to try to offer some comfort, but I will keep it simple and simply share that the friendship, understanding, and compassion I have experienced here saved my sanity, and probably my life. I mostly interact with another group, Bereaved Spouses (Larry and I were together 32 years when I lost him to cancer), which ended up being the first group I saw. Even though I later saw this group, I had found a family there who still have my back, and our loving members there are generous and gentle in their comments and stories. 

I do hope this site helps you find some peace as it did for me, and if you allow yourself to think of the place you now find yourself as the beginning of a new path along which you will meet people here who truly understand your grieving because we all are on the very same path. They have walked beside me, held me up when the tears wouldn't stop, and patiently guided me with their experiences and knowledge of my feelings and fears - and deep abiding sadness. Share freely, James, know you are surrounded by a circle here the other group refers to as "angels". and I do believe they are.

Take care of yourself, and don't feel alone in your grief - because we are all here when you need us.

With love,


Comment by Gregg Yazzie on April 26, 2017 at 4:30pm

James, I too feel your pain. Your story is loving and heartbreaking. As Janet mentioned, try out the grief support group on FB. There are many who have very similar experiences and it helps to know you are not alone in this journey of grief. Peace, love, and hugs to you. Gregg

Comment by John Arabie on April 26, 2017 at 4:17pm
Not sure if Im responding correctly but I wanted to tell James how sorry I am for his loss. What a handsome couple you are. My heart goes out to you. I find it difficult to talk about my loss. Hugs to you.
Comment by Janet Angelone on April 26, 2017 at 3:08pm

Hi James. So sorry for your loss of Mark. I used to come here to get support but moved to FB.  Go to this link. This is an awesome support group. Please join us. We have members from all over and we ALL understand and support each other.

Many hugs James. Hope to see you soon at FB! ❤❤

Comment by JAMES WOODARD on April 26, 2017 at 2:40pm

Hi. My name is James (left in pic). My partner's name was Mark (right in pic). I'm 53 he was 58. He passed away due to complication to heart surgery March 4, 2017.  We had 9 beautiful years together. I am finding it very hard to accept the fact that he is no longer here.  I can't sleep. I'm not eating right. I have these emotional outburst that I can't control. I cry myself to sleep every night and it's really affecting my job. His Mom and my friends are really worried about me and wants me to seek help. We use to do everything together. I know people say it will get better in time. But my heart fills like it has a hole in it. I talk to him some nights. I think about what could I have done different? He wasn't suppose to have surgery until this May 2017 but his symptoms got worse. He got to the point where he couldn't walk up a flight of stairs and could not walk from the office parking lot to his work. They started getting him a wheel chair to and from his car. So the surgery was moved up to this past February.  He was only suppose to be in the hospital for 4 days. It turned into 3 weeks. I will never forget that day when the doctor called me to another room and said he will not make it through the night. I called his family in and made the doctors tell them. 4 hours later he was gone. I stood by his bed side until he took his last breath. My heart was broken. I never thought I would be going through this so soon. I try to remember the great memories we had and there were many. But all I see is him laying in the hospital bed hooked up to that damn machine breathing for him. One time that took him off the ventilator to see if he could breath on his on. And he did! We all knew that was the turn around. I sat at his bed and he looked at me and said you have been crying? He told me not to cry he was gonna be alright. Well the next day breathing issues started again and had to put him back on that machine. 3 days later he was gone. I thought how could this be happening he said he was gonna be fine. Thanks for listening guys.


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