Gay and lesbians who have lost partners


Gay and lesbians who have lost partners

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Members: 115
Latest Activity: 16 hours ago

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Lost my partner to alcoholism

Started by Michael Savage. Last reply by Eric Furan 16 hours ago. 1 Reply

Hello all-Reading other discussions has helped me to not feel alone in this grieving process.Five days ago I lost my partner of 11 years to alcoholism. He would have been 42 this past Monday and I'm…Continue

40 years together

Started by David. Last reply by Mark Pace Aug 24. 6 Replies

I'm 62 now and I've just suddenly lost my darling Frank to a heart attack after 40 wonderful years together. I never stopped loving him for one minute and my own heart is broken.It's the funeral on…Continue

Welcome to the "Club"

Started by Eric Furan. Last reply by Eric Furan Aug 19. 10 Replies

Hi, my name is Eric Furan and I lost my beloved partner Patrik just about two months ago on June 10, of Pancreatic Cancer after 3 1/2 years of suffering more than I thought was possible.  I thought…Continue


Started by Robert Golden-Jones. Last reply by Rebecca Rude Aug 18. 6 Replies

My name is Rob and I lost my Husband, Mark on July 21st to lung cancer that spread to his bones and brain. Mark was my partner a little over 5 years. We were lucky enough to get married on June 28th…Continue

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Comment by Eric Furan on September 17, 2014 at 2:21am

Ok, so I have a question for the group here. I have been receiving email messages from other members addressed to the group at large, some of which are quite heart rending, however I am unable to reply as they are sent "do not reply at".  When I go to the web page they do not show up anywhere nor is there anything in my Inbox.  Am I missing something, doing something wrong, or are the messages sent this way because the sender does not want replies?  Sorry but I didn't get the Owners Manual when I signed up.

Comment by Eric Furan on August 14, 2014 at 9:28am


I often wonder which is worse, to be the one who has to go or the one who has to stay.  I haven't yet had to deal with the first birthday without Patrik, but I imagine it can't be much worse than all the other "first's" I've already had to go through.  The loneliness is the worst aspect for me and it will probably be with me for a long time to come and I know I'll miss him for the rest of my life.  I can't imagine what you are going through having lost both your partner and your son.  I've already found out that it's a day by day process.  I feel your pain - stay strong and be kind to yourself.  Eric

Comment by angel barnes on August 14, 2014 at 6:49am
We'll today is her birthday and the second with out her here ppl don't seem to say much any more they just look on as if they don't say her name or talk about her that it makes me better or something I miss her so much it's been a year and seven mo and five days with out her and then the loss of are oldest son in June of this year has really put me down but I no we will c each other again it just sucks alone after all those years with her in my life Ty for this site it helps to no I'm not alone Ty angel
Comment by Bill Neely on August 13, 2014 at 10:43pm
Eric, 9 months and 18 days here, and I've become the master of, "of course I am doing well, thank you for asking" I noticed right about 2 months after Josh passed away, that the questions from well meaning friends and family were being self answered, and if I was honest? Half the time they never heard my answer.
Take a huge hug and know that it won't always be this raw.
Comment by Eric Furan on August 13, 2014 at 9:54pm

It's now been two months and three days since Patrik died and I have gotten through the memorial, the scattering of ashes and our first anniversary without him.  I thought I was doing pretty good last week but yesterday and today have just been horrible.  I used to look forward to coming home as my "safe place" but suddenly I can't wait to get out of here and have been out every night in order to avoid coming back to this empty house. In the last two days I've been breaking into tears at the drop of a hat, in fact I'm crying as I sit here typing.  I've been telling all my friends that I'm getting better but the truth is I'm not.  When does it begin to even out?  I have communicated with a few people here in the group, and hoped I could help them with some of my experiences but the truth is I can't even help myself.  This is not a good day.

Comment by Christopher Ruggles on August 11, 2014 at 11:38am

Hey everyone.  I'm seeing a lot of new faces.  I haven't been on here much, but I do try to read what everyone is posting.  June 7th was the third anniversary of Barry deciding to leave this world.   I want you all to know that if you ever need someone to talk to, you can message me.  This path we're on isn't an easy one.  There will be parts where the path is all but lost in the overgrowth and darkness.  There will also be parts where the path is clear and sunny.  Your path is what you make it, however.  The trick is to grieve, not mourn.  Grieving is the process in which we are healing ourselves, while mourning is just stagnation.  Please, don't be too proud to reach out for help.

Comment by Justin Orman on July 28, 2014 at 10:11pm

Im sorry to everyone that I just sent a message too i meant to post it in the forum i am still getting used to this 

Comment by Sharon Dotson on July 8, 2014 at 10:19pm

This past holiday weekend was horrible.  My wonderful partner of 30 years, Helen has been gone for 7 months and I'm going crazy with grief.  I found a support group at our local equality center.  A friend is going with me next Monday for the first session.  With this group and all of you I'm hoping to get through this till I can cope better.  I feel all your pain and appreciate all your support.

Comment by Matt on May 31, 2014 at 2:58pm
Sharon, I am sorry to hear about your loss. Last week marked two years since my boyfriend passed away. If you would like someone to talk to and pray with, I'm here for you.
Comment by Sharon Dotson on May 12, 2014 at 7:35pm

Next week my partner of 30 years will have been gone 6 months.  She was my life and I'm lost.  I don't think I'll be able to go on without her.  I'm hoping this site can help me.  Local grief groups I could go to are for straight people only.


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