My partner died from small cell cancer in 2007.  We had a 17 year loving relationship and when she left this existence, I seriously doubted I could go on with my life.  One day has blurred into another ... I've made new friends and accepted the help that Hospice and a private therapist could give me.  I've made it through 5 difficult years ... one day at a time ... and managed to make sme new friends and find some peace with my situation.  I just don't feel happy and wonder when and if that might change. 

I've been preparing for a move and sorting through my partner's papers, notebooks, computer files, clothing, keepsakes, slides and photos has dragged me back down into longing and grieving and pain.  I'm hoping I can find some support and cheer.

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Rebecca: I'm proud of you as to making it for 5 years. My partner, Tina, died of a heart attack in March of this year. Next month would have been 29 years together. I had just retired & this was her last year to work. We had bought a retirement home near the ocean. At first, I didn't want to do anything. But, I have two elderly parents with dementia & I knew Tina would want me to be there for them. We had oenly talked about death as I also have a chronic health condition. Two wonderful friends sent me a very large engraved stone that says: "When someone you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure." So, like you, I live one day at a time & sometimes 5 minutes. But, I know that she's with me. Peace! Nancy

Hi Rebecca, my partner of 18 years died unexpectedly of a brain aneurysm last October 29th, DREADING the 1 year anniversary. I'm sure you can relate. I still have the feelings of not being sure if I can go on. My life also consists of living hour to hour, day by day. Going to the cemetary is agonizing so I find myself not going as much. I know this probaly doesn't help but at least we know their are other people out there that understand our pain. Where are you moving to? My partner was 48 years old, working as a prison guard, going to college for her criminal justice degree. I live in Minnesota, I'm an RN.

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