Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Darrell Sours on May 9, 2012 at 4:09pm

Hi John. I have several family members in the Asheville, NC area. One of them is a half-brother who is also gay. He is involed with a few political and non-profits groups and is very upset about Ammendent 1. I wish I could say that I am surprised about the ammendment passing but I'm not. I am sure that even here in Georgia an amendment like that would pass. Even with all the gay people especially here in the Atlanta area where I live. Most people in this part of the country are just not ready to accept gay marriage. I am sure that one day gay marriage will be legal in all states though I don't know if that will ever happen in my lifetime. It is a shame that so many of your neighbors have been such hypocrites.

I wanted to know that you my heartfelt condolences on the loss of your partner. My partner passed away 3 months ago today. It's been a rough road. We were together a little over 30 years. He was the kindest most decent person I have ever known in my life. I love and adored him so much. I can't even put into words how much I miss him. It's been a struggle but I have been hanging in there but sometimes just by a thread. If you ever want  to reach out at any time. I am here. Take care John.

 

Permalink Reply by John Tomkiel on May 9, 2012 at 4:28pm

Thanks Darrell. I sometimes feel the same way - hanging on by a thread.  I cried an hour every morning while walking the dogs for the first three months. I've had an amazing amount of support from friends and colleagues, but amidst it all I still feel incredibly lonely without him. I hope someday we can both find a source of happiness to balance out this sadness that will always be there.

Permalink Reply by Darrell Sours on May 9, 2012 at 8:33pm

Thank you John. That was very kind of you to say. I hope the same for both of us also. My family has been much more supportive than I ever expected. One of my partner Homer's sisters has also  been very kind. I have a wonderful friend who I have known since 1973 in high school (I am 55 years old) who lives in Florida who calls me most days twice a day to see how I am doing. She has really  been great. I have an  aquantince who I know did not mean to be insensitive  say " Oh Darrell I know it's hard right now but you'll get over it in time". I  didn't say anything but if you've ever really loved someone how do you ever get over it?  iIt may be easier to deal with in time but I know his passing is something I will centainly never get over. I will love and miss my Homer always. That will never change.

The president came out today supporting gay marriage! That's a step in the right direction.  What kind of dogs do you have John? When Homer and I first got together we had a poodle and chiauua ( I know I spelled it wrong) mixed dog  named Lady. later  on we had a Lab and Airedale dog named Melody. We also had several cats over the years. They were all sweet and wonderful and I hope they are all with Homer now. I don't have  a pet at this time but maybe sometime soon.