Hi Kristin, I want to start by saying I am deeply sorry for your loss. I lost the love of my llife, four months ago. He too was my soul mate, my best friend, my confidant. When I had a bad day, he brought me smiles. We talked about everything, and had plans for the future together. I wish I could say for sure its all gonna get better, but truthfully i'm not sure of that myself yet. I will say this, your loved one has never left your side, and never will. I know its hard, and I know you hurt but just remember coming here was the first step. And everyday will get easier, I still think of my Howie all the time, still cry myself to sleep at night. The holidays are gonna be tough, but if you need anything I am here. I know its not much, coming out of a computer screen, but just having people who have lost the same "type" of love has helped me sooo much. I'm here if you ever need to talk, Take care of yourself.... "BIG HUGS"