I lost my father only 4 days ago... The pain is still very fresh therefore I am still in shock. My dad was diagnosed with bladder cancer in August of '07, received chemotherapy for 6 months and in January of '09 was diagnosed with metastatic bladder cancer to the lungs and bone. Unfortunately, it was detected in his brain in September of '09. He grew very ill and it was painful for all of us to watch him suffer for 6 long months, especially the last 3 weeks of his life. I am the youngest child of 4, I was your typical attached "daddy's little girl". When I go into the house (even only being 4 days) it feels empty, waiting to see him in the chair or waiting to receive a call on the cell phone. My mother is lost and so sad after 42 years of marriage. He was young which doesn't help, only 65. It seems so unfair why someone has to suffer for so long. I do believe in after life and heaven (as I explain it to my 4 and 5 year olds). I know the loneliness is going to get worse and the pain may increase... any help on how I can get through these next few months for myself, my children, my husband and to help my mother in any way possible?
I know exactly how you feel. I lost my father suddenly last year on Christmas eve. He was found on Ocean park beach in the sand. It was all over the news, in the New London, CT newspaper. When my sister called to tell me, I was so shocked that my world became surreal. My dad was my best friend in the whole world. The hardest part about my grief is not knowing what happened to him. The police and autopsy report ruled out homicide, suicide, heart attack, and stroke. What on earth happened to him then? He was in good physical shape at age 57. He had left me a message the day before saying he loved me and couldn't wait to meet his new granddaughter (my baby). Sadly he will never have the chance to experience being a grandpa on this Earth. I have felt so alone for this past year. I feel lost...like you mentioned Jen. Fortunately, I have strong faith in my church and an afterlife, which has helped me get through this. I am A Latterday Saint, and we believe we can be with our loves ones forever after we die. Heavenly father sent us down here to test us, and when we return to him, life will be more magnificant then we know. Knowing this helps me make it through each day. I still feel great saddness though that he was taken at a young age. Today would have been his 58th birthday. I am not looking forward to Christmas either. It will be my first one (kind of second) with out him here. I also feel his presence strongly. Hang in there.....We will slowly feel better. Read the book "90 minutes in Heaven" by Don Piper it's really good. May you feel comforted this Holiday season.