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I also lost my Dad on 1/15/10, but to Adenocarcinoma. He was admitted a week before for blood clots in his legs, and we did not know it was cancer until 4 days later. We had just completed a successful elk hunting trip and he did his part in carrying 2 elk out of a canyon. He was 58 and strong as an ox. Dad was my best friend, my hero and my Dad at the same time. The strongest, most wise man I have ever met. He didn't suffer too long. My mind is a mess. I have been going through pictures for his memorial service slideshow for 6 days after work. I feel haunted. It is difficult to sleep and hard to keep a happy face to those that mean well. I miss him so much it physically hurts. This is the most difficult thing I have ever had to go through. I have a wife and 3 children that I am trying to help through this, and it seems as though I am a hypocrite because I can't even control myself. It has gotten a little easier to deal with, but my thoughts are always on him. If I am not busy, my mind wanders through memories. I hope this is normal. All I can do is keep trying to think that I need to give my children the same thing my father gave me. That is his legacy. Unconditional love, understanding, care, sympathy, knowledge, friendship, guidance, strong ethics and morals, and the most important thing, home. This tragic loss to humanity is affecting many people that he touched over the years, so I know I am not alone.
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