Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Laney on April 14, 2010 at 4:28pm

Jennifer,
I can relate to what you say. I lost my mom last year and I was the youngest girl with two older brothers. My mom was 90 still living in her house and driving her own car when the cancer came and took her away from us within 3 months. I feel so blessed to have journeyed beside her, but miss her presence every day. Watching her suffer and get weaker every day was the hardest thing I have ever faced, but she could not go on like that. After she passed, I joined a support group from Hospice and attended memorials and that helped somewhat. If you ask God for comfort, He will give it to you. I don't think the sadness ever really goes away, but if you do the hard work of mourning, it will get a little easier. Now I just try to be more like her, obey God and have a more intimate relationship with Him. Mom would have liked that.

Permalink Reply by Jan Hoyle on April 14, 2010 at 7:51pm

Jennifer, My Mom died May 8, 2006 and most of the time, my 1st thought is to call her to tell her what just happened or wonder what she would do or say in a certain situation. I miss her guidance, wisdom, laughter & most of all - HER UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR ME!!! My world is so empty without her!! I'm not sure about time healing ALL wounds. This is the deepest, saddest, most awful wound I've EVER had happen to me. I lost my Dad Sept. 3, 2008 & I miss him, too, but it's just not the same. THERE'S NOTHING LIKE THE LOVE OF YOUR MOM!! You will grieve & move along thru this process in YOUR time frame - DO NOT LISTEN TO WHAT OTHERS THINK YOU SHOULD BE FEELING OR DOING!!! I just with I could tell you something to help you feel better, but we both know I can't. Except I care & I want you to feel free to write back to me ANYTIME!!! That's about the only thing that helps at 1st, get it out, talk about it. I'm here. Jan Hoyle

Permalink Reply by smwill on April 14, 2010 at 8:13pm

Hi Jennifer, my condolences to you and your family during this difficult time. I lost my mother this last December 27 and I still cannot believe she is gone. I still have her number programmed in my cell phone as I find myself picking up the phone to call her. only GOD knows how much I miss her - I lost my best friend. I know exactly how you feel. there is no right or wrong way to grieve - if you want to cry, scream, be angry, feel free to do so because it is whatever works for you. Keep your head up!!!

Permalink Reply by Jennifer on April 15, 2010 at 11:48am

Thank You for sharing your thoughts with me. Its hard, I was there when she took her last breathe. I watched her suffer and that hurts the most. I wish I could call her and let her know how my day is going and that I love her.

Jan Hoyle said:

Jennifer, My Mom died May 8, 2006 and most of the time, my 1st thought is to call her to tell her what just happened or wonder what she would do or say in a certain situation. I miss her guidance, wisdom, laughter & most of all - HER UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR ME!!! My world is so empty without her!! I'm not sure about time healing ALL wounds. This is the deepest, saddest, most awful wound I've EVER had happen to me. I lost my Dad Sept. 3, 2008 & I miss him, too, but it's just not the same. THERE'S NOTHING LIKE THE LOVE OF YOUR MOM!! You will grieve & move along thru this process in YOUR time frame - DO NOT LISTEN TO WHAT OTHERS THINK YOU SHOULD BE FEELING OR DOING!!! I just with I could tell you something to help you feel better, but we both know I can't. Except I care & I want you to feel free to write back to me ANYTIME!!! That's about the only thing that helps at 1st, get it out, talk about it. I'm here. Jan Hoyle

Permalink Reply by Neta Ford on April 15, 2010 at 2:19pm

I know the feeling I lost my mom on March 15th, 2010 and this was my first Easter without her, I wish I could tell you how to cope, but I can't. I'm Learning that everyone grieves different. She only had my sister and I and we are over 20 years apart. When I'm alone I think about her more. So I been trying to stay busy so my mind won't stay focus on the pain that I feel. I watch my my mom also take her last breath, and it was the worst feeling in the world , and every so often every thing replays back in my mind. I start grieving some more. Yeah everyone keeps telling me that time heals. This is one wound that I'm sure will take time. I wish there a way that I can tell you to cope, but the only way that I'm coping is through God, and prayers, during moments like this, that is all I got to comfort me. I hope this helps, you aren't alone in this situation, although at times you feel like no one undestands your pain. Believe me, I still feel that way. I miss her dearly. The more I talk about her the better I feel, like one person said get it out talk about it, it does help some.

Permalink Reply by re on April 15, 2010 at 7:54pm

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. One of the things that has help some people to cope with the death of a loved one is by turning to God for comfort. In the Bible it tells us what God is planning to do in the near future. This is found in the Bible book of John 5:28,29 where it states "Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out." This verse is helping us to see that in the future God plans to resurrect our loved ones who had died in the past. Just think in the near future you can have that hope of seeing your mother again and do some of the things that your used to do. This is not no mere dream or some fantasy. In the Bible there had been examples of those who had been resurrected by God after they had died. These examples where just a taste of what God plans to do in the near future but on a worldwide scale. But until that time comes God encourages us to pray to him, in order to help us to cope with whatever is causing us to be depressed. This is brought out in the Bible book of Psalms 55:22 where it states "Throw your burden upon Jehovah himself, And he himself will sustain you. Never will he allow the righteous one to totter." This verse helps us to see that whatever pain that you may be suffering from death of your mother, Jehovah God fully understand what you are going through, that is why he is able to make that promise that he will sustain you. God will help you cope with the death of your mother. If you want to find out more on what other scriptures that will help you cope with the death of your mother and give you hope, feel free to ask any Jehovah Witnesses in your area or you can send me a message.

Permalink Reply by Gina on April 16, 2010 at 9:00pm

Im not sure I have any answres because you will have your own path.My mother left this earth nov 15/ 05. I cant say time has done a whole lot. I have just learned to survive with her being spiritually available rather than physically.I have visual memories daily of her. and I hear her voice helping me make decisions everyday. So I can just say I dont really feel she is really gone.When I need to have a hug from her i just visualize her reaching her arms out and coming toward me and I close my eyes and actually feel her hugging me.I feel so loved and safe at that moment.It really feels better.I feel guilty that im alive and she isnt. She sacrificed so much for me to be healthy and safe .She deserved to live longer and happier and healthier for more years.I know its healthy to practice acceptance but i feel what I feel and that is that. I do know she would want me to get the best years out of my life.She always had a wonderful zest for life.I still cry a lot and my friends do know how much grief im in.Take care Gina

Permalink Reply by Darnell Ray on April 17, 2010 at 12:16am

I lost my mother on April 11,2008 and it was very difficalt to deal with. Sometimes i feel i didn't do enough or feeling i was to hard on her because i want her to get better. For the first time after 2 years i put flowers on her grave and for some odd reason i didn't feel sad or hurt i focus the life lessons she gave to my brothers and me and it was a great expierence i felt that i needed, God Bless!

Permalink Reply by Mary-Jo Clapsadle on April 18, 2010 at 7:16am

Jennifer,
I lost my mom the day after Easter 2010.
I am so sorry about the loss of your mom. I lost my wonderful mom, my best friend, on April 5, the day after Easter. I was her primary caregiver for about 12 years and saw the steady decline and she was in several assisted living homes. I always visited her and now when I am in the car I really don't have a specific place to go since she is no longer here. I am also rather lost and know that I can't call or talk to her again. I know how difficult and painful this time is for both of us. Maybe we can help each other though this period of adjustment. The days are getting a little better but I have a more difficult time at night. I am hoping that it becomes a little easier in the future. My friends have been wonderful and supportive and I couldn't have made it this far without them.

Permalink Reply by Jennifer on April 18, 2010 at 7:45am

Thank you all for your thoughts. I am trying to deal with this the best way I know how. Our family is not the closest, and it seems like I have no family. My mom was the only family I ever had and now she is gone. I have my children, but they are so young and they are having a hard time as well.

Permalink Reply by Warren Washington on April 19, 2010 at 4:11am

Hello Jennifer I'm sorry for your lost heres and article that may help you cope with your lost take care. I hope this helps.

WHEN A LOVED ONE DIES. lost a loved one in death? The pain, the grief, and the feelings of helplessness can seem unbearable. At such times, we need to go to God’s Word for comfort. (2 Corinthians 1:3, 4) The Bible helps us to understand how Jehovah and Jesus feel about death. Jesus, who perfectly reflected his Father, knew the pain of losing someone in death. (John 14:9) When he was in Jerusalem, Jesus used to visit Lazarus and his sisters, Mary and Martha, who lived in the nearby town of Bethany. They became close friends. The Bible says: “Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.” (John 11:5) As we learned in the preceding chapter, though, Lazarus died.

5 How did Jesus feel about losing his friend? The account tells us that Jesus joined Lazarus’ relatives and friends as they grieved over this loss. Seeing them, Jesus was deeply moved. He “groaned in the spirit and became troubled.” Then, the account says, “Jesus gave way to tears.” (John 11:33, 35) Did Jesus’ grief mean that he had no hope? Not at all. In fact, Jesus knew that something wonderful was about to happen. (John 11:3, 4) Still, he felt the pain and sorrow that death brings.

6 In a way, Jesus’ grief is encouraging to us. It teaches us that Jesus and his Father, Jehovah, hate death. But Jehovah God is able to fight and overcome that enemy! Let us see what God enabled Jesus to do.
“LAZARUS, COME ON OUT!”

7 Lazarus had been buried in a cave, and Jesus asked that the stone sealing its entrance be taken away. Martha objected because after four days, Lazarus’ body must have begun to decay. (John 11:39) From a human standpoint, what hope was there?

8 The stone was rolled away, and Jesus cried out with a loud voice: “Lazarus, come on out!” What happened? “The man that had been dead came out.” (John 11:43, 44) Can you imagine the joy of the people there? Whether Lazarus was their brother, relative, friend, or neighbor, they knew that he had died. Yet, here he was—the same dear man—standing among them again. That must have seemed too good to be true. Many no doubt embraced Lazarus joyfully. What a victory over death! Jesus did not claim to perform this amazing miracle on his own. In his prayer just before calling out to Lazarus, he made it clear that Jehovah was the Source of the resurrection. (John 11:41, 42) This was not the only time that Jehovah used his power in this way. The resurrection of Lazarus is just one of nine miracles of this kind recorded in God’s Word.* To read and study these accounts is a delight. They teach us that God is not partial, for the resurrected ones include young and old, male and female, Israelite and non-Israelite. And what joy is described in these passages! For example, when Jesus raised a young girl from the dead, her parents “were beside themselves with great ecstasy.” (Mark 5:42) Yes, Jehovah had given them a cause for joy that they would never forget.

10 Of course, those resurrected by Jesus eventually died again. Does this mean that it was pointless to resurrect them? Not at all. These Bible accounts confirm important truths and give us hope. LEARNING FROM THE RESURRECTION ACCOUNTS. The Bible teaches that the dead “are conscious of nothing at all.” They are not alive and have no conscious existence anywhere. The account of Lazarus confirms this. Upon returning to life, did Lazarus thrill people with descriptions of heaven? Or did he terrify them with horrible tales about a burning hell? No. The Bible contains no such words from Lazarus. During the four days that he was dead, he had been “conscious of nothing at all.” (Ecclesiastes 9:5) Lazarus had simply been sleeping in death.—John 11:11.

12 The account of Lazarus also teaches us that the resurrection is a reality, not a mere myth. Jesus raised Lazarus in front of a crowd of eyewitnesses. Even the religious leaders, who hated Jesus, did not deny this miracle. Rather, they said: “What are we to do, because this man [Jesus] performs many signs?” (John 11:47) Many people went to see the resurrected man. As a result, even more of them put faith in Jesus. They saw in Lazarus living proof that Jesus was sent by God. This evidence was so powerful that some of the hardhearted Jewish religious leaders planned to kill both Jesus and Lazarus.—John 11:53; 12:9-11. Is it unrealistic to accept the resurrection as a fact? No, for Jesus taught that someday “all those in the memorial tombs” will be resurrected. (John 5:28) Jehovah is the Creator of all life. Should it be hard to believe that he can re-create life? Of course, much would depend on Jehovah’s memory. Can he remember our dead loved ones? Countless trillions of stars fill the universe, yet God gives the name of each one! (Isaiah 40:26) So Jehovah God can remember our dead loved ones in every detail, and he is ready to restore them to life.

14 How, though, does Jehovah feel about resurrecting the dead? The Bible teaches that he is eager to raise the dead. The faithful man Job asked: “If an able-bodied man dies can he live again?” Job was speaking about waiting in the grave until the time came for God to remember him. He said to Jehovah: “You will call, and I myself shall answer you. For the work of your hands you will have a yearning.”—Job 14:13-15.

15 Just think! Jehovah actually yearns to bring the dead back to life. Is it not heartwarming to learn that Jehovah feels that way? But what about this future resurrection? Who will be resurrected, and where? “ALL THOSE IN THE MEMORIAL TOMBS”

16 The Bible’s resurrection accounts teach us much about the resurrection to come. People who were restored to life right here on earth were reunited with their loved ones. The future resurrection will be similar—but much better. As we learned in Chapter 3, God’s purpose is that the whole earth be made into a paradise. So the dead will not be raised to life in a world filled with war, crime, and sickness. They will have an opportunity to live forever on this earth in peaceful and happy conditions.

17 Who will be resurrected? Jesus said that “all those in the memorial tombs will hear his [Jesus’] voice and come out.” (John 5:28, 29) Similarly, Revelation 20:13 says: “The sea gave up those dead in it, and death and Hades gave up those dead in them.” “Hades” refers to the common grave of mankind. (See the Appendix.) This collective grave will be emptied. All those billions who rest there will live again. The apostle Paul said: “There is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.” (Acts 24:15) What does that mean?

18 “The righteous” include many of the people we read about in the Bible who lived before Jesus came to the earth. You might think of Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Moses, Ruth, Esther, and many others. Some of these men and women of faith are discussed in the 11th chapter of Hebrews. But “the righteous” also include Jehovah’s servants who die in our time. Thanks to the resurrection hope, we may be freed from any dread of dying.—Hebrews 2:15.

I What about all the people who did not serve or obey Jehovah because they never knew about him? These billions of “unrighteous” ones will not be forgotten. They too will be resurrected and given time to learn about the true God and to serve him. During a period of a thousand years, the dead will be resurrected and given an opportunity to join faithful humans on earth in serving Jehovah. It will be a wonderful time. This period is what the Bible refers to as Judgment Day.#

20 Does this mean that every human who ever lived will be resurrected? No. The Bible says that some of the dead are in “Gehenna.” (Luke 12:5) Gehenna got its name from a garbage dump located outside of ancient Jerusalem. Dead bodies and garbage were burned there. The dead whose bodies were thrown there were considered by the Jews to be unworthy of a burial and a resurrection. So Gehenna is a fitting symbol of everlasting destruction. Although Jesus will have a role in judging the living and the dead, Jehovah is the final Judge. (Acts 10:42) He will never resurrect those whom he judges to be wicked and unwilling to change.
THE HEAVENLY RESURRECTION

21 The Bible also refers to another kind of resurrection, one to life as a spirit creature in heaven. Only one example of this type of resurrection is recorded in the Bible, that of Jesus Christ.

22 After Jesus was put to death as a human, Jehovah did not allow His faithful Son to remain in the grave. (Psalm 16:10; Acts 13:34, 35) God resurrected Jesus, but not as a human. The apostle Peter explains that Christ was “put to death in the flesh, but . . . made alive in the spirit.” (1 Peter 3:18) This truly was a great miracle. Jesus was alive again as a mighty spirit person! (1 Corinthians 15:3-6) Jesus was the first ever to receive this glorious type of resurrection. (John 3:13) But he would not be the last.

23 Knowing that he would soon return to heaven, Jesus told his faithful followers that he would “prepare a place” for them there. (John 14:2) Jesus referred to those going to heaven as his “little flock.” (Luke 12:32) How many are to be in this relatively small group of faithful Christians? According to Revelation 14:1, the apostle John says: “I saw, and, look! the Lamb [Jesus Christ] standing upon the Mount Zion, and with him a hundred and forty-four thousand having his name and the name of his Father written on their foreheads.”

24 These 144,000 Christians, including Jesus’ faithful apostles, are raised to life in heaven. When does their resurrection take place? The apostle Paul wrote that it would occur during the time of Christ’s presence. (1 Corinthians 15:23) As you will learn in Chapter 9, we are now living in that time. So those few remaining ones of the 144,000 who die in our day are instantly resurrected to life in heaven. (1 Corinthians 15:51-55) The vast majority of mankind, however, have the prospect of being resurrected in the future to life in Paradise on earth.

25 Yes, Jehovah really will defeat our enemy death, and it will be gone forever! (Isaiah 25:8) Yet, you may wonder, ‘What will those resurrected to heaven do there?’ They will form part of a marvelous Kingdom government in heaven.

Permalink Reply by Donna on April 19, 2010 at 11:23am

Moms and their girls have special bonds. Your mom would not want you to be like this. I'm sure she tried to raise you to be a strong woman. My faith got me through when I lost my mother. The world will never be the same, and each day does get better. Try to incorporate any traditions your mom did into your life to celebrate hers to keep traditions going. I know you don't like to talk to people, so get a counselor. That's what I did. I lost both of my parents within a year, along with a brother-in-law, father-in-law and my best friend. I took care of my mother and my girlfriend in my house when they passed. I miss them terribly, but I try to remember, my mother would not have wanted me to be this way - where enjoyment of life stops. Talk to her every day if that helps. But most of all, pray to God for peace. Through his son Jesus, you can find that.

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• 2
• Next ›
• Page