Mom Passed 5/29/10
she was 86
i miss her so much
she was my best friend
my only friend
she is the only one i trusted

i know shes better now
but i feel lost empty so alone
i dont want to get out of bed no less get out of the house
all i do is cry.... and i feel like i dont want to go on

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Janice, hello I feel the same pain and hurt and emptiness that you feel deep down in your heart for I just lost my Daddy last week 6-22-2010 and My Daddy was my everything from the time I was a little girl. What I am missing the most is that I will never hear him tell me that he loves me or me to be able tell him that I love him .
i totally understand your feelings i feel that way about my mom its been a bit longer for me but everyday i wake i tell her goodmorning and talk to her throughout the day and the only thing that keeps me going is knowing her she would want me to keep on going but its really a hard thing i hope it gets better for you
Dear Janice,
In solidarity...I know :( I lost my Mom exactly three months ago. Things will get better and you will find your way. Sometimes I am at peace with this and then I have a wave of grief that I must allow myself to experience. Lately I have made an effort, no matter how long it might take me, to get presentable and get out of the house. Sometimes I don't even have any fun when I get out but I gotta have faith that eventually I will find joy again, other times the outings are more enjoyable. My point is to keep trying and be patient with yourself. Keeping you in my Prayers.
Hi Janice, I know exactly how you feel my mother died so suddenly on the 29th April 2010, everything you said i relate to. My Mum was my everything, we were so close and had such a beautiful friendship as if we were best friends, She guided me through life and gave me my confidence even when i had done things that i was not proud of she still loved me unconditonally and never judged me. She was only 64 and i feel like you do such emptiness and feel hollow. I can honestly say that i cant begin to understand how my life is going to continue with out her. I sometimes feel like you just be so much easier not to go on as the pain is to much. I dreamt the other night that it was all a dream that she had died, there i was saying oh my god it was all a dream you didnt die and holding her and crying and just blown away that my mum was alive. It was so real that when i woke in the morning i was feeling the same as i did the day she passed. I love her so much and just want to hear her voice or to have a giggle but that is what i find the hardest, just knowing that will never be and that is what i find so difficult to cope with. I am 39 and feel sad she was taken from us so young. I hope in time we can be on here telling others of our story and be able to say in time it gets easier. I went to her memorial site for first time yesterday and i cried a river i could not stop and it scares me sometimes just how much i cry and feel i dont want to face the world so i stay home and do nothing but think of her and her beautiful memories she has left for me to think about. I hope in time it will get better for you. Please know i am understanding everything you say but if i can offer something that my mum's friend said to me. "your mum would hate to see you like this Nicola she would not want to see you in pain with your greif she wants you to celebrate her life and try to think about that when ever you can becauce its true no Mother wants to see thier child hurting. ( I know thou that is hard when its still so raw) Thinking and praying for you Janice.
Thank all of you for sharing thoughts and feelings,experiences to me.

i truely do appreciate each and every one of the posts.

i forced myself to go to the store yesterday (ugh)
my IC suggested i do it even tho its uncomfortable
as i was driving,it came to me that i feel like i am in a foreign country
i cant explain it exactly..something like when i talk to my husband he doesnt understand (like im talking a different language)we had troubles BEFORE the deaths EVEN MORE NOW...


my kids are adults live out of state and they dont get it.....yes blahblahblab beeter life not suffering at peace long life etc..........but what a bout me(seems so f'ing selfish when i say thay but wth i lost my mom!my only friend(true)
i dont have any by choice,(childhood taught me that)
depresssion has always been a part of me since a kid
.
anyways thanks to all of you
janice
Hi Janice, sorry to hear about the loss of your mother, who meant so much to you. Losing your loved one that you deeply cared about can be very depressing. One of the things that has helped many people to cope with the death of a loved one is by turning to God for comfort. When you read the Bible you will see that it was not God's original purpose for mankind to die. One of the things that God plans to do in the near future is brought out in the Bible book of John 5:28,29 where it says "Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out," These verses helps us to see that soon God will bring about conditions on this earth were those who had died in the past, will have that hope of being resurrected. Just think Janice, you have that hope of being best friends with your mother once again, once God bring about these conditions on the earth. This is not no feel good story or some sort of fantasy. In the Bible, it talks about those who have been resurrected by Jesus Christ, while he was on earth. But God promises to do this on a worldwide scale. God also promises this as brought out in Revelation 21:4 where it says "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” This verse helps us to see that in the near future God promises that death will be no more. Nobody will ever have to worry about their loved ones being resurrected, then dying again. No God promises that death will be a thing of the past. But until that time comes God encourages us to rely upon him in prayer, to help us get through whatever emotional pain we may be going through. This is brought out in the Bible book of Psalms 55:22 where it says "Throw your burden upon Jehovah himself, And he himself will sustain you. Never will he allow the righteous one to totter." As this verse brings out, by us praying to Jehovah God with our problems, or the things that are causing us emotional or mental pain, he promises us that he will sustain us. The reason why he is able to promise us this is because he knows exactly what we are going through, and knows how to help us. If you want to find out more on how drawing close to God will bring you comfort, and more comforting Scriptures from the Bible. Feel free to send me a message and I will get back with you as soon as possible.

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