I lost my Mama 7 30 2010. do to family issues I did not know til December 2010. To this day I still do not know. Mama was/is my world. My heart is broken in pieces.

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Yes, it does get better, Baby-daughter but you have to forgive yourself for whatever family issues kept you from knowing that your Mama was gone for 5 months before you knew.  I believe we can talk to our lost loved ones and they will hear us.  I recommend that you talk to your Mom and say all the things you need to say.  Then forgive yourself or be willing to forgive yourself.  Blame creates guilt, which creates punishment, that creates pain.  Your Mama loves you and doesn't want you to suffer anymore.  My Mom and I were estranged when she passed.  She was in a coma for 3 days before we disconnected her.  She sends me dimes.  We are as close as ever, just in different ways. 

Thank You Charlene my family issue was with my sister she kept my mom from me after my stepfather passed I called I wrote I begged. I don't even know where my mother is. I have been talking to my mom but nothing nothing seems to help. I'm completely alone since mama passed away. I even called the agency for elder abuse for help and they told me how horrible it would be for my mama for me to file a complaint and I could not put my mama through that. my sister falsified and changed Mama's will and it has nothing to do with money because my mama did not have anything. again thank you very much but I don't know how to fix this. I'm sorry for the typos and maybe the way this is where did but it's hard to do this through tears and the tears don't stop.

Oh, I'm so sorry!  Have you tried searching for your Mom's obituary online? It might tell where she is buried.  It sounds like you might be angry at your sister.  I know I would be.  Have you tried asking God to make you willing to forgive her?  I have a friend who is a funeral director.  I am going to ask him if there is a way to find out where your mom is buried.  That is terrible that your sister kept your Mom from you.  Karma-she'll get it back!  You probably can't fix anything at this date.  I am alone too so I know how that hurts.  Don't stop crying.  Tears release the toxins in your body.  What was your Mama's name?

yes you're correct I'm not just angry at my sister I am pissed off my mom is not buried as she wanted to be and had a fully paid policy for a traditional burial instead my sister had her cremated against her wishes which is why I know the changed will is false. I have called the funeral home the doctors office I have a copy of my mom's death certificate. The certificate says she was cremated and the doctors and the funeral home refuse to speak to me without consulting my sister first which is against the law. My Mama's name is FAYE MAE BAUGUS SHE PASSED IN El Cajon, CA

I am on meds due to the nightmares of Mama calling to me to help her out of the fire in the crematorium. I have them 3 to 4 times nightly

My sister refuses to release any info to the attorney my sister also did not tell my niece and nephews (except her 2 sons) of my mother's death for 2 months and they also have no knowledge of what my "DARLING" SISTER DID WITH HER REMAINS I am not against cremation but Mama did not want this to let you know how bad it is between myself and my sister is we have not spoken since summer of 1984 along with what her husband and herself did to me for 4years age 12 to 16 yes I am very very angry.


Baby-daughter said:
yes you're correct I'm not just angry at my sister I am pissed off my mom is not buried as she wanted to be and had a fully paid policy for a traditional burial instead my sister had her cremated against her wishes which is why I know the changed will is false. I have called the funeral home the doctors office I have a copy of my mom's death certificate. The certificate says she was cremated and the doctors and the funeral home refuse to speak to me without consulting my sister first which is against the law. My Mama's name is FAYE MAE BAUGUS SHE PASSED IN El Cajon, CA

I am on meds due to the nightmares of Mama calling to me to help her out of the fire in the crematorium. I have them 3 to 4 times nightly

My sister refuses to release any info to the attorney my sister also did not tell my niece and nephews (except hrr 2 sons) of my mother's death for 2 months and they also have no knowledge of what my "DARLING" SISTER DID WITH HER REMAINS I am not against cremation but Mama did not want this to let you know how bad it is between myself and my sister is we have not spoken since summer of 1984 along with what her husband and herself did to me for 4years age 12 to 16 yes I am very very angry. I never told Mama anything


Baby-daughter said:
yes you're correct I'm not just angry at my sister I am pissed off my mom is not buried as she wanted to be and had a fully paid policy for a traditional burial instead my sister had her cremated against her wishes which is why I know the changed will is false. I have called the funeral home the doctors office I have a copy of my mom's death certificate. The certificate says she was cremated and the doctors and the funeral home refuse to speak to me without consulting my sister first which is against the law. My Mama's name is FAYE MAE BAUGUS SHE PASSED IN El Cajon, CA

I am on meds due to the nightmares of Mama calling to me to help her out of the fire in the crematorium. I have them 3 to 4 times nightly

My sister refuses to release any info to the attorney my sister also did not tell my niece and nephews (except her 2 sons) of my mother's death for 2 months and they also have no knowledge of what my "DARLING" SISTER DID WITH HER REMAINS I am not against cremation but Mama did not want this to let you know how bad it is between myself and my sister is we have not spoken since summer of 1984 along with what her husband and herself did to me for 4years age 12 to 16 yes I am very very angry.

Well, I don't blame you for being angry.  The nightmares sound horrible.  You're not responsible for that tho. 

 

My heart goes out to you, Baby-daughter. I lost my mother on Dec. 10 of 2012 & I am still crying buckets & also having nightmares, although not as bad as yours. Years ago when my daughter was killed, a friend

gave me a book entitled "Healing the Greatest Hurt" by Dennis & Matthew Linn & Sheila Fabricant. It is very helpful in all areas of grief, including all the negative things that happen. One of the first steps is to share our hearts with Jesus, telling him whatever we are feeling, especially our negative feelings that could block our relationship with him. It has been very helpful, since I, too, am alone with this, but I find that I have to keep sharing all my feelings with him - again & again! What's done is done & I think you can only move on when you go through the forgiveness process & are willing to let the past be the past. And I agree that you just have to keep letting the feelings flow until they lose their power. People keep telling me that my mother is at peace. Well, I know that! But I still grieve the loss of her! So I don't know whether it will help you to know that your mother is at peace, too. Sometimes we even have to pray for the deceased in order to heal that violation of their wishes so that we can deep within ourselves know that they are at peace. My daughter suffered much at the hands of her husband, but by this time I know that both she & I have forgiven him & that she is happy in the life beyond.

Thank You Joyce and Charlene I appreciateyour comments and I will look into the book that was suggested
ladies go to my name and click on where I remarked beautiful you won't be sorry

5 full months without knowing,I'm so sorry.

thank you

Melinda Guinn said:

5 full months without knowing,I'm so sorry.

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