Do you have a family doctor that you can talk to? The can help you with meds or maybe refer you to a counselor. Or about a priest or clergy from your church, they have resources to refer you for some help. I wish I had the words to comfort you, but I don't and I don't want to give you the lines that I am sure you have heard already. I lost my Dad Oct 18, of this year and am having good/bad days. I don't know if that was of any help, I hope so. Take care of yourself, and I will keep you in my prayers.