My 18yr old daughters best friend suddenly lost her healthy vibrant momma!

My daughters best friend "CC" (18) suddenly lost her mother to a car accident yesterday. CC is the oldest of 4, her mother had divorced their "crazy" father several years ago, she was beautiful, young, healthy and full of life! CC is the oldest and 1 of her younger sisters is currently in a mental hospital...

CC got pregnant in high school by a boy she has been with for 6yrs (my daughter has been with her boy friend for 6yrs also--the boyfriends are best friends also) CC and her BF made the adult decision to give the baby up for an open adoption..so she is obviously a very strong young lady! She depended heavily on her mother during this time, during which their relationship grew by leaps and bounds

To the point: 
My daughter has asked me what she can do or say to support CC in the very best way!! I haven't ever lost a parent so I am coming to you for your advise.
 
My daughter is super sensitive and has her own problems of severe RA and Fibromialgia which leaves her bedridden on many days. Their other best friend has lived with us for 2 years because her father is in prison and her mother is clinically, mentally ill. She also had an extremely bad case of Scoliosis and had to have a rod placed down her total spine several years ago-it was sooo bad it caused her to become 2 inches taller. 

The reason I'm explaining my daughter and their other best friends family and medical issues is because even though they haven't experienced the pain of loss the way that CC has, they have endured allot of other types of pain in their very young lives.
All 3 girls are 18. 

CC is in college, she is living at college 45 minutes away from home. She was supposed to come here last night but could not stand to be in the family home alone with out her mother being there. My girls went to her college town to be with her immediately after hearing the news!
CC went with her grandfather this morning to identify the body and have it released.

This young lady may end up having to drop out of college to care for her siblings as a young adult. 

PLEASE! Any advise would be greatly appreciated!!

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Replies to This Discussion

Just be there for here. When i lost my mother it was very comforting having all these people bring food or just come and sit with us. Theres no a whole lot you can do other that just be there for them. I would say stay there for them. It amazing how much people care when you lose someone. Then, 2 weeks later you never see them again. Just be there as much as possible and for as long as possible. Well, i hope this helps.
Dear Stephanie,

That sure is a load on CC, but like you said ... There are things she has faced that
have made her strong. Keep praying for that strength to sustain her. I have no doubt
that CC's Mom will be close by her. THANK GOD that their relationship strengthened before
her Mom's passing. Sometimes it takes a child into their 20's to really bond with a parent.

Even thought your dtr and the other friend have some issues themselves, I have no doubt
that their being in CC's life will be a support and comfort.

NO ONE can take away the pain for the loss of a parent, but you can just LET CC know
that you are there for her.

That is sad that she might have to delay her school plans, but I have a feeling that
CC will one day accomplish what she has intended to. It might take more time, but she
will do it.

Sending prayers for all.
xo xo
Debra

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