I will thank you , I think I will call the priest because Its not getting better and after three years, It should be, I dont expect him to ever get over the death of his mother, however, I expect him at this stage to be getting past this and on with his life, or at least accepting she is dead and buried and visiting the grave but not to just see his dad but her too. thank you for talking to me, because Im was at my witts end, thinking I must be nuts or maybe its me, but I will call the family priest who he adores, and hopefully he will speak with him, and he can help him through this a little better thank you
Linda, as a man your husband will feel he could have changed things for the better. Its grief, believe it or not, three years is not so long. And he is grieving this is his way. My husband feels the same way it’s been over 20 years. I listen to him, reassure him that I was glad he was with her before she pasted and remind him of all the good he did for her that seems to help change his focus for a time. As you go through this period of sorrow remember; The Bible assures us God "is healing the broken hearted ones, and is binding up their painful spot." Psalm 147:3 pour your heart out to him this will help both of you
I can sympathize with you and your husband! I lost my father on January 26th of this year. He was a retired Mortician of 20 years. So...you think it woud be easier for me but it wasn't! He has performed thousands of funerals of which I attended and still I found mysef having lots of difficulties accepting it since he was only 66. He had a bad heart. Two weeks before he died, I went to visit him on Kauai but I was told that I coudn't see him. A lot of drama escalated from that! And continued till his death. The guilt that I was feeling for not being by his bedside was tormenting me. But...what helped me to overlook the situation was remembering that my father was a minister of God. He believed in the hope of the resurrection promised in the Bible at John 5:28, 29. Jesus promises to wake up our loved ones from the grave. And Psalm 13:3 speaks of death as falling asleep. I share the same hope. This has helped me to carry on day after day. But...this weekend we scattered his ashes and I finally broke down! So, it will happen but your husband is the only one who can measure when that happens cause it's personal! My husband actually hates to see me cry so I try not to in front of him cause he freaks out! So maybe, in private, he has found his time or he will. What is important is that he knows you are supporting him no matter how he's dealing with her death and let him know you will never leave his side. Time and patience plays a big part in this. MY condolences to both of you. Aloha!