suicide's survivors

talk to other survivors of loved ones that took their life and learn how to cope with everyday life, how to carry on,try to understand and know why you feel the way you do.

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Discussion Forum

I dont know how much longer i can hold on...

Started by Melissa Shuler. Last reply by Angel Jenkins-doyle Mar 11, 2016. 5 Replies

I wasn't ready to say good-bye

Started by Kristin miller. Last reply by T.C. Goodwin Feb 26, 2016. 4 Replies

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Comment by Theresa Sweaney on February 24, 2012 at 5:56pm

Carin, I am glad to hear that you are finding the supports that are working for you! 

And Jerica, you are in my thoughts and prayers this month.

Comment by Jerica Guerra on February 21, 2012 at 7:35pm

Hi Carin- I'm glad you found comfort in the Bible n also your Pastor. I too read the bible when i find the chance. Which is often. It's gonna take time. I didn't lose a child but lost my closest brother to suicide. It's gonna be 9 months on the 25th of this month. His B-day is on the 27th of February. I plan to celebrate by taking off work that day and spending it at the Cementary. I feel your pain as well. I think of him everyday, i dont cry as often as i did before. But i do, i do! I do too panic sometime and i find comfort to my Partner. She's been there for me from day one when it all happened. So try to find comfort in a close family member of even a close friend. May God bless you and watch over u and family.  

Jerica--Hugs :) 

Comment by Carin~ Cody's Mom on February 21, 2012 at 6:34pm

Hi All, Something happend to me yesterday that made me realise that me holding onto my faith is working for me in my situation. I have been taking my bible to work with me everyday. When I start to go into a panic attact I read some of the verses some my friends, family my pastor and even some of you have given me to read. Well... I left my bible home and when i reached for it yesterday during one of the worse days since Cody left us. I PANICED! I started sweating my world starting coming down around me. I couldnt breath. Sooo . I woke my pastor up out of bed and made him talk to me till I calmed down. Now I know we all have our own feelings with GOD right now but  I just wanted to share with you that this is working for me and I didnt realise I was being helped and healing till my comfort that is called a bible or book was not there for me. I think I'm healing at the same pace as the rest in the group but I realised yesterday that healing is taking place when I never thought I would see it. My thoughts and prays go out to all the  parents who have lost a child. My heart will always ach with yours. Today is 2 months for me since I  loss of Cody. 7:29PM I have NOT cried one time YET anyway. and I have cried all day everyday in the last 2 months.

God Bless all of you and your hearts... HUGS 

Comment by Theresa Sweaney on February 11, 2012 at 11:57pm

Carin, I got a book from the library about Grief Dreams.  I was in a fog when I was reading it, but according to memory there were like 4 or 5 different kinds of dreams... all were considered important for one reason or other, even the painful ones.  I have had a couple painful ones, and the way I look at it is that my mind was still hard at work even in my sleep to process and resolve all the terrible pain pent up in my broken heart.  I hope it is getting us further through this nightmare of loss and heartbreak.  Losing a child is a terribly hard thing to process, not to mention the suicide.  We who have lost our loved ones to suicide have two major events to work through.  I think it is the hardest thing we'll ever do.  My thoughts and prayers are there with you.

Comment by Carin~ Cody's Mom on February 10, 2012 at 11:11am

Today is a very bad day for me. Fridays I work from home. I had a really bad dream last night that my son was screaming and I couldnt find him. I tried so hard in my dream to find him but didnt and walked up to the site I saw the day I found my son in his room. Why must we be so tormented by this? The loss of our children isnt enough that we sometimes have to relive it in our dreams.I have spent all morning praying and waiting and looking for any comfort sign to calm me down. To relive this at times when you think your doing betting is such a major set back. I miss my son so much and wish I could have been the one person to save him. God PLEASE give me back my strengh

Comment by Carin~ Cody's Mom on February 10, 2012 at 10:40am

Karen... Happy Birthday. That was so sweet of her to leave you rose. My son use to take pictures of sunsets and send them to me on my phone if he was out with his friends. Since Cody's passing I have seen the most beautiful pink sunsets. I know he is sending them to me. I hope you have a blessed day.


Comment by Theresa Sweaney on February 9, 2012 at 10:12pm

@Karen... What a precious birthday gift from your daughter Marlene to you Karen!!!  That is truly remarkable!

Comment by Karen Campbell on February 8, 2012 at 4:12pm

I have to share with everyone what happened last Friday.  It was my birthday and while waiting for another couple to meet us for dinner, my husband and I went for a walk on the Tampa Bay and I was walking along and doing a lot of thinking about Marlene and all of a sudden I looked down and amoungst the seaweed was perfect longstemmed red rose.  At first I thought Joe had done it but I had been with him all day and he didn't leave my sight so it couldn't have been him.  And there was no one else on the beach...I put it in the visor of our car and Saturday morning it was still perfect......I am sure that it was Marlene leaving me a sign......what else could it have been.'''


Comment by Karen Campbell on February 8, 2012 at 4:07pm

Dear Elizabeth.  I am so sorry about your niece.  My daughter will be gone 1 year on Mar 12.  Her situation is very much like your niece.  Except that her husband divorced her after their only child died of a siezure in 2008.  He was 14.  the Husband has been able to on with his life and has a girlfriend who has children.  Marlene still loved the SOB and took her own life after hearing that they were going to have child.  He would never let her have any more children.  I also could not get the investigative police to look into the possibility that she was assisted.  I believe it was the exsister in law for reason I will not  go into at this time.  But the police dept treated myself and my other daughter like crap and told us we watch to much TV, etc.  I am composing a lettter to DateLine to try to see if they can help us find some answers...Hold tight to her memory...I believe there will be signs from her for you.


Comment by Crystal on February 8, 2012 at 3:06pm
Hi everyone, I just lost my brother on January 27, 2012. I am feeling so much pain. I went back home to help with the funeral & found I kept myself so busy in order to cope with the reality that he is gone. I have so many questions, I cry and I miss hearing his voice. I wish I could talk to him to know he is ok. Being home I felt like my body couldn't take it I was shaking, my head would and neck would twitch & jerk... I think I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I know I need to find faith but I'm so lost I don't know we're to look

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