The story I never thought would be mine..

After 26 years of not knowing where I came from (even though raised in the most amazing, loving and Godly home) the law changed and allowed my original birth certificate to be released. I opened the phone book and found my birth family after the 2nd call! Crazy as it sounds I few up so close to them. I instantly went from being the baby to being the oldest. Under me were my brother and two little sisters. 13 years was not long enough to establish all that there was to come of us... My baby sister was vacationing in Hawaii and was murdered the day before her 29th birthday (May 17th, 2013). This is so freash, so new, so painful and so confusing. I honestly don't even know where to start.... Just in so much pain as we laid her to rest and said our final goodbyes on Monday 6/3. How will I ever get thru this?

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Permalink Reply by DEBBIE WRIGHT on June 5, 2013 at 11:52am

Dear Little Big.,

I am so sorry for your loss. What you feel is normal. I have been down this road. I could not grasp the fact that someone took the choice away from my loved one to live. I was angry and the pain I could not bear. I no longer feared death. Despite I am so very needed here on earth with a handicap child I want to go be with my grandson. In Oct will be 2 years and through love, support and websites like this I will celebrate the wonderful life of my grandson. How did I do it? One day at a time. I wrote my thoughts down remembered the beautiful child he was but most of all remembered that he was with Jesus and I would see him again. Don't look at tomorrow. Take one day at a time. We all grieve differently some a week a month and they are able to move on some months or even years. I still have fits of raging anger. When they come I look at his smile or go back and read my journal or just pray. Go to a support group. There are many out there and it helps because you can share your feelings with others that feel as you do. I am here if you need to talk. Know that you are in my thoughts and Prayers.

May God Bless you and your family

Permalink Reply by Little's BIG on June 6, 2013 at 5:24am

I replied to this post but I don't see it... Am I doing something wrong?

Permalink Reply by Little's BIG on June 6, 2013 at 5:34am

Today was FULL of the unexpected. Emotions all over the place as more and more information regarding my sisters case came in....and then an arrest was made. Some may think we would be excited as some wait weeks, months, years and others are STILL waiting for closure. But I'm angry, worried and confused even more as to why. What will happen next? Will justice actually be served? Seeing him makes the ME report even more clear.. As hard as she fought she had no chance aganist him. What was her life worth to him and why didd he take it? Seems like I have more questions and less answers. What hurts worse is the sun is still rising, kids are going to school and people are still going to work.. But my baby sister and her unborn daughter are still dead. Does anyone besides us remember that? It feels like no one knows anymore and this is a fresh new case... Adding more pain. I want everything to STOP, recognize the loss and never forget her.

Permalink Reply by purity kagwiria muchena on June 11, 2013 at 2:59am