Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

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This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.


Discussion Forum


Started by Julie. Last reply by DJ Dec 6, 2020. 1 Reply

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31, 2020. 13 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019. 5 Replies

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Comment by Yvonne on May 16, 2010 at 12:21pm
That says it all Kathleen
Comment by kathleen caylor on May 16, 2010 at 11:30am
This was in today's paper with an ad for a necklace,thought I'd share this with you"I now know the beauty of life,and understand the deepest sorrow.I now know the soaring of heartfelt joy,And the hope of tomorrow,I now know with each step,Faith sees you through,I now know the meaning of love,With the memories of you,Although we are apart,Our journey never ends,It continues on with love unitingus,Until we meet again."
Comment by Yvonne on May 16, 2010 at 10:14am
I want to say how sorry I am for your loss. I lost my husband of 38 years suddenly as well. It has been 9 months and 1 week for me. I understand your feeling that you no longer have a purpose in life. I sometimes feel that way too. I try everyday to honor Larry's memory by carrying on the legacy he has left me. I do the repairs around the house, I am carrying on with our business and looking after anything else that needs to be done. I think one of the worst things about losing our spouse is the loneliness. Just the other evening for a moment I thought I should stay in the house because Larry might phone. I miss him terribly, as I know you miss your wife too. One day at a time, that is how I carry on. Thanks for the hug, I needed that.
Take care Yvonne
Comment by Randolph L. Schrader on May 16, 2010 at 8:24am
Today is exactly 13 months since my wife died suddenly and I am so sad. She loved horses and the three races they have every year for" The Triple Crown". She would watch all of it and pick the winners.My pal is gone now and everything in life reminds me of her not being here with me.What does one do when they are 67, alone,no friends,family on their own with children and their own problems,her friends and family ignoring me and no one to share things anymore? I guess I am out to pasture now. Hugs to all.
Comment by BoLynn on May 16, 2010 at 1:21am
Cute, not fat...LOL!
Comment by BoLynn on May 15, 2010 at 11:37pm
Yes you are, Tom!
Comment by BoLynn on May 15, 2010 at 7:57pm
I feel like a two scoops of mint chocolate chip ice cream banana split. I'll eat while you sing, Tom.
Comment by Tom on May 15, 2010 at 12:50pm
Hi Virginia,
My 7th anniversary would have been this Monday the 17th of May. I'll be spending it with my 11 cats and remembering Loni Going out to buy cat food is no easy matter is it . And then there's the Litter.
I get most of the cat food from Walmart by the cases, it the cheapest place around so far for Friskies can food. I get 7 cases at a time. The litter I get from Safeway, about $9.00 for 28 lb. a box. I get four of those at a time. I don't like to go out so often for all of that. They are what keeps me going too !I miss the fun Loni and I had together. I would try to make us both happy everyday. I like your husband sence of humor ! Got to love them silly kitties !
Comment by Virginia on May 15, 2010 at 9:12am
Hi today is my 17th wedding ann. The 2nd one i must get thru without the love of my life, even though he passed last april it still is so raw, I have a picture of him on the morning of our wedding that my mother-in law took as I was not allowed to stay in our house the night before lol, my husband said I must go to a motel lol because it was bad luck to see me before thw wedding, even tho we lived together for 17 yrs. before we married lol. He came down the stairs in his bib overhaules and a straw hat and told his mom he was ready to get married lol lol he was such a mess so she took the picture. I think I'll have it made into a 8x10 to put next to our wedding picture lol. it is now 10 a m and that is the time we got married his doing also what, a mess he was always making me laugh how I miss him so much.The pain is so unbearable I've been in a real funk of deppresion this week I really need to do something but don't know what as I sit in the house all day and when I have to go out usally to get cat food I can't wait to get home I truelly don't know what I'd do without my 13 indoor brats and 3 outdoor ones they keep me going they are rather bossy lol tell me when it's time to eat and time for treats lol but I truelly think without them I wouldn't have made it this far. I hope the week gets better but not sure if it will thanks for letting me blow off steam Virginia
Comment by Marlene on May 15, 2010 at 3:02am
To Kathy O. My husband passed on Jan 7th. I feel the same way as you and you have a right to feel this way and so do I. I can be cheerful and upbeat during the day, but boy, at night, I cry and miss him so much. I keep wondering why I don't dream about him, but I don't. However, little things happen, a song, a tv show, a news item and I tell him what happened. You are not crazy. You are a grieving woman and grief is normal. There is no set period for it. People can grieve for months or for years. It's a very personal thing. I get apathetic and let the house get messy and feel there is no purpose in cleaning it up and then I just can't stand it and think what would John think of this? Last night I went to a jazz concert and heard Sonny Rollins a great saxophone player. He played a song called, "My One and Only Love" and I burst into tears thinking about my one and only love and how many times we went to see Sonny together when he was alive. If you have counseling available use it or if not keep in contact with this group. They seem to be a group of pretty smart people who want to help. My love to you. I know what you are going through, don't we all.

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