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Bereaved Spouses

A continutaion of the "When a Spouse or Partner Dies" thread.

Members: 1374
Latest Conversations: on Thursday

This might be a rough time for many of you. Do what you feel you need to do to get through it. Remember, someone is here almost all the time to talk to you.

Peace

Discussion Forum

Grief so great it hurts

Started by Bonny Jones. Last reply by Diamond Jan 31. 13 Replies

Navigating Widow-hood

Started by Tim's Mom, Vickie. Last reply by Michele Jul 21, 2019. 5 Replies

Finding the new normal

Started by Sharon Kinsey. Last reply by Frances C Younger Jun 24, 2019. 12 Replies

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Comment by Chris B on March 25, 2010 at 7:17pm
I just want to get to the point that I can think about our life together without it ripping me to shreds...
Comment by arnie on March 25, 2010 at 1:12pm
i wish i could reach the point where it becomes a 'never' event.suzanne was my whole world;and i can't begin to move on.
arnie
Comment by Chris B on March 24, 2010 at 7:07pm
I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing - maybe it's just "a thing" and it will go away at some point, but... I look at pictures of me and Dan (like my profile picture) and it's like I'm looking at someone else, that I never lived that life, that the pictures of the two of us happened to someone else. Maybe because it's too hard to think about how it used to be, how happy we were, how much I loved him, how much he meant to me. It's easier to pretend it never happened, because it doesn't hurt as much. I know it's not the right way to handle it, but it's the only thing I can do right now.
Comment by kathleen caylor on March 24, 2010 at 9:07am
My grandaughter wrote to her paw paw "I loved you once,I love you still,Always have,always will" I think that speaks volumes!!!
Comment by BoLynn on March 23, 2010 at 1:12am
Just a side note. I lost two uncles this week, 3 days apart, from cancer. One had lung cancer and the other leukemia. It's been a tough week for my family.
Comment by nona amble on March 22, 2010 at 11:18pm
I lost my husband 10 yrs ago, and today is the day he died...
Comment by Steve Cain on March 22, 2010 at 11:18pm
Cathy,
I am so sorry for your loss. I'm glad to see you got involved in a support group. Mine has been a great help to me, not just in terms of tools, but also in knowing I am not alone in this journey. To be able to talk to people who understand why you are the way you are now is a great therapy.
Firsts, and I'm sure seconds, thirds and so on, are hard. Heck, I still have moments when I think about my parents and they have been gone since 1989 & 1993. I will tell you, so far I have gotten through Kris' birthday (8/10) which was seven days before what would have been our 1st Anniversary (8/17), Christmas, Valentine's Day and St. Patrick's Day, which was big for her because she'd eat Corned Beef & Cabbage which I can't even stand, and I am Irish. Each day you take either baby steps or big steps. I will warn you the big steps are usually the "backwards" ones, where something you see or hear sets off a memory and then a reaction. Don't worry, those are normal and OK, and let no one tell you otherwise. Just let you be who you are, and always keep the lines of communication open so that people can help when you need it.
Comment by Connie H. on March 22, 2010 at 10:47pm
At 10:39pm on March 22nd, 2010, Connie said…
I have been sitting here, thinking what can I say? How can I express what the loss of "My Man" has been like? Going to the link below, then into obits. on the left, scrolling down to Phillip J. Harvey, then going into the condolences left for him says it all.
http://www.jasinfuneralhome.com/ Delete Comment
Comment by Cathy on March 22, 2010 at 8:58pm
Comment by Cathy just now
Delete Comment I lost my spouse, Craig one month ago. I miss him all the time. I know all the first's without him will be coming up and it will be very difficult to cope with. I joined a bereavement group in my community which meets once a week, I hope this will help me cope. I also have my work and my grandchild, who lights up my life whenever I see her.
I loved the time I had with my spouse, seven beautiful years, I only wished that there could have been many more. Love you Craig.... xoxoxox
Comment by kathleen caylor on March 22, 2010 at 4:25pm
Lois,Imagine how I felt when my husband came home and collapsed,I did CPR for 10 min.without success,I'm a nurse that worked on a telemetry unit.I felt like a complete failure.It's so different when it's one of your own.Having done CPR in the past with good results I felt it to be so ironic!Like I said his fate was taken out of my hands!We all carry some degree of guilt.But I'm over that at least.I hope you all know that you did your best.Knowing that brings me some peace.
 

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