A place for people who are going through loss to support one another .

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I lost my younger brother 4 weeks ago

Started by Jamie Ann. Last reply by Ewa Toole Feb 5. 36 Replies

5 yr Anniversary

Started by elyse. Last reply by Melinda CANDACE Guinn Jun 10, 2019. 1 Reply

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Comment by Melinda CANDACE Guinn on July 7, 2015 at 3:47pm
I'm so sorry Judy. My older sister and I are very close. Our little brother just passed away 9/22/14 drom PHT, a respiratoty disease AND HE'S a Respiratory Therapist!
Comment by Judy D Gamble on July 7, 2015 at 9:08am

My older sister passed away less than two months ago.  My husband passed two years ago and I grieve for him every day.  My sister and I were very close - it was just she and I - no other siblings.  She was like a little mother to me my whole life of 75 years and, although my husband and I moved to another state 8 years ago, she was only a phone call away.  It seems like grief for my sister is now "layered" on top of grief for my husband.  I miss her so much.

Comment by Melinda CANDACE Guinn on May 21, 2015 at 6:39pm

Thanks Margaret. I just finished rewatching the video of my lil' brother Doug, when he got married on 12/08/90. Their daughter Ashley's grown now and attending college, which Doug is happy about. I miss Dougie so very, VERY much!!! He's a Resoiratory Therapist and passed from PHT or PVOD. I bet in his line of work, he caught something! So sad, he's such a good, kind and funny as heck kind of guy! I LOVE/MISS you so much!!! WHY???!!!

Comment by Margaret Lopez on May 19, 2015 at 6:27am

May the God of all comfort be with everyone today. You are in my prayers...

Comment by Melinda CANDACE Guinn on March 25, 2015 at 9:39pm

Gwen, I'm curious what your actual beliefs are when we pass? I was raised believing in God. I don't go to church but I talk to God. When my daughter passed 4/09/10, then my younger brother on 9/11/14, I HAVE to believe in a higher power for my own sanity! I have LOST two VERY important people in my life.I live in the USA, that's WHY we can talk like this. My advice is to skip over a post you find unnerving. Too many people have fought and died for my rights.

Comment by Pam Dimsdale on March 25, 2015 at 3:40pm

The loss of my sister was my very first "loss". I teach that grief is not just a result of experiencing a loss through death; the potential for a grief experience can come as a result of anything in our lives that causes change. My sister would be excited to know that something good has come of her death --- and that is the way that I view what I have personally gained through this experience.  Sometimes people look at me in an odd sort of way when I talk about this.  I knew that I had to make sense out of what happened and this has been my way of doing it. In hospice, I see people of all ages, families with many dynamics all doing this same thing .... searching for an understanding. Of course, when someone dies at such a young age, it doesn't for the normal life cycle that we expect. It adds an additional layer of "stuff" to sort through. Comfort will come ..... but it is definitely a process. 

Comment by Karen Liller on March 25, 2015 at 1:41pm

Hi Pam-

I really agree with you.  Tears very easily come to my eyes when I think of Lisa as she passed such a short time ago.  She really thought she would beat cancer and wanted to live so badly.  She was only 49.  I now wear one of her favorite rings all the time and my daughter, who was very close to her, wears her bracelet.  She is always very near.  It is heartening to hear that you counsel individuals who have lost siblings.  We are a unique group and I am glad that you have joined us.



Comment by Pam Dimsdale on March 25, 2015 at 12:31pm

I am new to this group..... I lost my sister to cancer in 1995. She was more my mother than she was my sister as she was much older. She was the cornerstone of our family. She was my best friend.  She was only 46.

This loss in my life was the catalyst for what I currently do - I am a social worker and I work in grief support for a hospice. Sibling relationships are so very unique and this type of loss is such a disenfranchised one. Time doesn't heal, it's what we do with the time that is healing. My sister left for me a treasure box of memories. In this box are memories that use to bring tears to my eyes and now ..... those very memories are what bring smiles to me face. My relationship with her has been redefined to, not one that is physical, but one that is one the emotions, heart and mind. The treasure box is a gift that I believe God allows us to have. It's a challenge to define what our new normal looks like. There is rarely a week that goes by that I do not think of her or have something trigger a memory.  I use to cringe at the concept of a "trigger", but now, those triggers are, too, part of my relationship of memories with her. I'm thankful for them. When I work with those that have lost a sibling, my empathy level increases even though losses cannot be compared and we each define what our own grief journey looks like.

Comment by Karen Liller on March 25, 2015 at 11:46am

Hi Letitia-

You will be in my prayers as you remember your loving brother.  I lost my beautiful sister Lisa in November 2013 and it seems like yesterday.  I rely on the fact I will see her again in heaven and we will rejoice.  While I know not everyone shares our faith, I do hope for the Easter season all people feel a sense of renewal, hope, and peace.


Karen Liller

Comment by Letitia Beasley on March 24, 2015 at 10:43pm

 4 years ago yesterday, our family chain was broken, I lost my brother and my best friend. I thank my mother and grandmother for making sure that I learned about the Lord at an early age, because it is through my personal relationship with God that I have made it this far. If it had not been for the Lord on my side, I don't know where I would be mentally, physically or spiritually, but I have been wise enough to know that I can go to the Rock and he stands by me. There is not a day or moment to go by that I don't miss my brother and his sense of humor, our talks and visits, but he is at rest now and I know that he is no longer suffering. Keep us in prayer as we remember not how my brother left this world, but how he lived!


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