Okay, I know I'm still new at this grief thing (my Charlie died 37 days ago). When I don't feel excruciating pain and sorrow, I feel dead inside. I seem to be hearing the same thing from some of the rest of you who have been at this for two years or more. I am 66. I could live another 20 years. If I have to feel dead inside for all those years, I absolutely do not want to live. God created marria…