So - yes 6 mos passed on May 4.  A week or so later I did feel something inside me let go in some way - I want to live and enjoy life again.  I can't go back and that part of me that thinks I can is starting to fade.  For me I was personally a miserable person at least careerwise and I just ignored it because my partner propped me up.  HE made life doable.  After he died I just collapsed and coul…