I lost my dad almost a year ago , I am trying so hard to get over it but I keep feeling such guilt and pain.  I am lucky if I go a day without crying and the dreams are so unbearable. I keep dreaming it's my last day with him and everyone knows he's going to die but him. we just look at the clock praying it won't happen and then it does and I can't breath.  This changed me in away I can't describ…