Thank you for your response as I greatly appreciate it/you.
Yes-you captured it so well when you said: There's just nothing like the companionship of a beloved mate who totally understands you and comforts you when you need it.
"So- Following Hurricane Katrina: I lost my home, lost my tenured professorship, then three and a half years ago my father died, Roz-My soul mate died suddenly from an aneurism. My mother went into an altheimers unit and she recently passed away. My…"
I'm saddened that you are so depressed. Yes- we are alone. Some of us more so than others. But we have a self and a spirit. I try to connect with the core of myself to recognize it's strength. I distract myself with thoughts that…"
"Barbara and Janice,
I have no idea how we go on, other than we do. I force myself to get up in the morning, go to work, come home exercise, dinner and bed. Why I make money- I have no idea other than to pay the bills. There's nothing I can do…"
From your description of the circumstances of your husband's death -you have a major mental and emotional burden to attempt to sort through. This group is here to listen, be empathetic, supportive and through our own experience,…"
Yes- when participating in various activities we feel some pleasure in the activity and the companionship. Then back to our home and the reality that we're alone and lonely. It reminds me of the movie- ground hog day. Where each…"
"CB- thanks for the link. It is a way to conceptualize the goal of our spirit and soul to redefine ourselves when death ends a life but not a relationship. I agree with what we need to become but the trick is how not to be anihalated. As for me and I…"
Happy Birthday! I've written three responses to your comment. Somehow all three got deleted. Not writing a fourth because I'm to frustrated. But everything you said is so on. It's amazing how so many of us have almost…"
"Janice- thank you. You express yourself in a way that I can feel your heart. It's such a miserable way to go through life. It' knowing what has to be done to approximate some peace but not having the tool to do so. I believe I should…"
"You all are so helpful. Even with your own suffering to assist us in trying to move through our grief. There was a link that Frank made available. I started to read it but didn't finish. I can't find it now. But it seemed so apropos. That…"
"Marsha H, that's quote that is remarkably accurate. The more I try to diverge from my routine- the more crazy I feel. It's so unfamiliar that it's like being a stranger in a strange land. My brain can't adjust to letting in…"
Thank you for the link. I appear to be one of the 20% who have a complicated bereavement with depression. I am on medication but am limited to one type of antidepressant owing to my fatal arythmia. All the other meds effect the heart rythm…"
Your highlighting-I think the most important thing I derived from the article is that we don't "get over it" -- our lives change, radically, and we go on -- but, we go on in a life forever changed.
Going on in a…"
"I keep trying to normalize my life. Why Roz died from a giant aneurism at 59 remains remarkable to me. I don't know of any of the couples who are contemporaries down here who have lost their wife. As many of you know only too well, it's…"
I just want to let the group know that I left out of my profile one of the most important persons that provides me support- my brother. Although we are 1500 miles apart he has been there for me always. He calls regularly to check on me. He always listens, is patient and loving. He has many life challenges but is always there for me. I love him dearly.