My mother died two weeks ago from a long struggle with emphysema. The void I feel is so tough. I long to see my Dad every day and yet know that is not healthy or possible with a family of my own. I feel bad, yet I know that my Dad's void is even larger. It is just sad.....and a fog just seems to come in when I least expect it to. I am trying so hard not to judge my feelings, my reactions or my thoughts but it is difficult not to. My Mom was a tough person to get close to, I longed for a closeness my whole life. I guess I have grieved that for 40 years and yet an surprised by the immense grief I have today. A part of me realizes that a hope I held onto (that one day we could be real close) is now impossible. That hope died with her. People keep telling me to take one day at a time and I am doing that. Grief is a true bummer.