Christine Blaire
  • Female
  • Burghill, OH
  • United States
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  • David Heggi

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Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear friends..... Went a.nd saw surgeon. It's stage two aggressive cancer. They don't feel it's gone anywhere else so they are going to do Mir and pet scan. She said with chemo,radiation,and surgery it is curable.I told her no do the…"
18 hours ago
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear friends..... Went a.nd saw surgeon. It's stage two aggressive cancer. They don't feel it's gone anywhere else so they are going to do Mir and pet scan. She said with chemo,radiation,and surgery it is curable.I told her no do the…"
yesterday
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Well dear friends....had the biopsy, Dr called me in.  Yes I have breast cancer  Previously I had told her no treatments a lumpectomy was suggested where they only take out the lump no radiation or chemo. The mammogram and chest crazy and…"
Friday
Christine Blaire posted a photo

Photo uploaded on December 6, 2017

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.
Dec 6
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear David, Mary Jane, etc. I've hit a low...Friday was invited out by my brother in law and sister-in-law. Did my nails, that's as far as I got. Last night I was supposed to go out with my daughter and her gentleman friend, didn't…"
Dec 3
Christine Blaire liked Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
Nov 30
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Dear Chuck, Deborah, David,Marsha, Mary Jane I want you all to know that I'm not upset or put off by anything that you've said to me. I appreciate your concern and I know that you are speaking from the heart. I will talk to this Dr on…"
Nov 30
Christine Blaire liked Kaela Roster Federle's discussion Need Advice:Grief and Chronic Fatigue
Nov 30
Christine Blaire liked David Heggi's discussion Bad day
Nov 30
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"No David. I'm not going to tell you to go to hell! Thank you for caring. I know I'll be told that since the grief is so new I'm not thinking clearly and in six months or so ill change my mind and it will be too late. No, that…"
Nov 28
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Well, went for tests today, mammogram chest X-Ray and ultrasound. Seems there is a large mass about an inch and very dense and yes, it's cancer. So, Monday I talk to a breast cancer Dr and they scheduled a biopsy for Tuesday morning. I told…"
Nov 28
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Last night was the celebration of my Marshall s life. It was amazing. There was good, karaoke, funny stories a beautiful slide show was made, the cake had our picture on it, solo much food. The friends and family....I can't thank enough. There…"
Nov 26
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Well, tonight is my husband's celebration of life party. My husband did karaoke shows for 17 years and there will be one at the vfw where he entertained for over three years. I have gotten dressed up as I always did for him. He was the…"
Nov 25
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Deborah.....this too was my first holiday without Marshall. He just passed on Nov 1.  I went to his sons house,who calls me mom, even though his mother was there too. I have a good relationship with her because the divorce was a very long time…"
Nov 24
Christine Blaire commented on Steve Cain's group Bereaved Spouses
"Happy thanksgiving to all. The words sound shallow don't they? This is the first time since 1972 that I haven't fixed thanksgiving dinner. I loved it and even though there were only for or six of us I had a big turkey. My Marshall loved…"
Nov 23
David Heggi left a comment for Christine Blaire
"Oh Chris, Please don't do this. Even I believe there has to be something better for us. I see myself in your heartache. sometimes I am so helpless in my own world of hurt I think that I can't possibly be of help to anyone else. But I have…"
Nov 21

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At 9:57pm on November 21, 2017, David Heggi said…

Oh Chris,
Please don't do this. Even I believe there has to be something better for us. I see myself in your heartache. sometimes I am so helpless in my own world of hurt I think that I can't possibly be of help to anyone else. But I have to; it is the mandate of every caring human being. Please wait this out a little longer. My baby sisters name was Chris. I raised her from infancy as our father was physically abusive and beat up my mother and us every night.
She too did not see any reason to continue and so did not take care of herself. She died more than 2 years ago, leaving huge holes in all of our hearts. It was a tragic unfinished life that I do not want to see in my commitment as a friend to you. She was only 53.
Please wait it out a little longer. maybe we will both look back on this and know what the purpose of our suffering was. I couldn't go to bed tonight knowing of your unbearable pain and not try to comfort you. Let me be your bridge over troubled waters.
Love and Hugs,
David H

At 5:02pm on November 21, 2017, David Heggi said…

Dear Christine,

I read your message.  It broke my heart as I am in the same place.  I'm 67 and don't feel I have 2 minutes more, let alone years. My well-meaning family and friends have said all the words that, for all practical purposes, feel like just more crap.  It might be OK, and even normal to be cynical in this stage of our grief - after all, how can anyone understand.?

I have pills too, and even a stash, but not for a plan to end my life; I believe that it will come naturally of a broken heart. Still, I want you to hang on.  Like what a therapist asked me many years ago " Don't you want to at least see how this (my life) all plays out?" I didn't have an answer, I couldn't have - the now was too critical for any kind of reflection, any luxury of time that everyone else seemed to have.  Be my friend in this, Christine;  we will try together. OK?

Hugs 

David H

 
 
 

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