Cindy's Page

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At 11:39am on February 14, 2011, LuLu said…: Cindy - hope things are going well and your life is getting better - we will never get over the pain, but have been left here for some reason...

At 1:16pm on September 29, 2010, LuLu said…: Cindy - I want you to know that I am thinking of you today - I realize it is an anniversary for you - so Godspeed and I will pray for you and your wonderful son...LuLu

At 1:16pm on September 29, 2010, LuLu said…: Cindy - I want you to know that I am thinking of you today - I realize it is an anniversary for you - so Godspeed and I will pray for you and your wonderful son...LuLu

At 7:27pm on September 19, 2010, Carrie L said…: Hi Cindy... hope you are ok. thanks for writing. your son is beautiful. I haven't posted any photos of my son. it has only been 6 months. I am sorry your anniversary is almost here. I will try to get with you on that day also. for I know it is going to be the saddest day in your life. it doesn't seem to get better and i am not asking it to. just have to deal with the sadness. i have been very sad also. i wish i had been there for him like you have for your child. i moved nearly 5 years ago. his death has changed my mind. i can't believe it though i know i have to. i will just be thinking normally and then think of that over and over and over. it is sadder than anything imaginable. how old was your baby? mine was nearly 24. seems like a bad age for this. looking at your photos.. unbelievable.. i feel for you and me... do you live on an island.? we are in KY carrie L

At 8:14am on August 25, 2010, LuLu said…: Cindy - thank you for answering - is this your son in the picture - what a handsome young man - it is heartbreaking to realize that we can't fix their hurts like we did when they were young - such a sad jouney we are on - and one that none of us really knew about until it happened - I saw an article that one man wrote about losing his son to suicide - he said that once that occurs a parent has one foot in hell for the rest of their life - and I can see how that would happen - I am medicated and see a therapist - I love my daiughter so much and the guilt I feel is terrible..but I am trying for the rest of my family - unfortunately, we all have to stumble our way thru this ..LuLu

At 8:14am on August 25, 2010, LuLu said…: Cindy - thank you for answering - is this your son in the picture - what a handsome young man - it is heartbreaking to realize that we can't fix their hurts like we did when they were young - such a sad jouney we are on - and one that none of us really knew about until it happened - I saw an article that one man wrote about losing his son to suicide - he said that once that occurs a parent has one foot in hell for the rest of their life - and I can see how that would happen - I am medicated and see a therapist - I love my daiughter so much and the guilt I feel is terrible..but I am trying for the rest of my family - unfortunately, we all have to stumble our way thru this ..LuLu

At 4:51pm on August 24, 2010, Carrie L said…: Hi Cindy My loss was in march. sorry for all of us and our beautiful children. I really don't think they are in a better place because their place is with their moms and dads and the lives they chose to live. It is terrible sad. I am here i am so sorry Carrie L

At 7:37pm on August 22, 2010, Carrie L said…: Hi cindy I am sorry for your losses my goodness. But the child loss is the most traumatic. He is very hansome why in the world. I guess you will never know .. i too am very sad. my life is changed forever. very very sad. wish this and that but cannot change a darn thing now. Carrie L

At 9:41am on August 11, 2010, LuLu said…: We will never really know why - what it was at that one moment that made our loved ones take their lives - I know it will be in my mind forever...It has been 20 weeks now - my other daughter just came to stay with me for 2 weeks before school started since everyone thinks I am losing my mind - but I am not - I am reliving memories of happier times...Lulu

At 8:21am on August 3, 2010, LuLu said…: Cindy - have you planned anything for his anniversary - some people get their family together for memories, some release balloons, one mother told me on her son's birthday she put a card in the mail to him just as she always did - she knew it wasn't going to go anywhere but she wanted to do what she had always done - I look to Christmas and can't imagine the pain of the day; I cried all day on her birthday; I will cry on my birthday because I won't receive her call - and ask my self over and over again..why why why..how could I have saved her...but I know that it wasn't my choice it was hers - what makes it so sad is that you and I both know that life can change in a moment, an hour, a day....our children may have felt overwhelmed at the precise moment they decided to leave us, but in a day or a month or a year, their entire life would probably have been different - unfortunately, when depressed, they don't understand that....Thank you for responding to me and letting me vent - it helps since others try to understand but do not understand the pain of this type of less...LuLu