Darrell Sours
  • Male
  • Decatur, GA
  • United States
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At 7:07pm on September 12, 2016, Neil Do said…

I've started up an LGBT Facebook grief group to make it easier to post, share & support one another...

https://www.facebook.com/groups/LGBTgriefsupport/

At 8:05am on July 14, 2012, John W. Jones said…

Hi Darrell: Are you okay?  I'm getting a little concerned about you!

At 5:45pm on July 7, 2012, John W. Jones said…
**More to follow** Send me an email Darrell - didymous52@aol.com - - I think theres a size limitation on this site. I can write more in an email. So can you. If you don't feel comfortable doing that right now, I'll understand. I'm still a stranger after all. But, do stay in touch. This is VERY helpful to me. And, I hope for you also. **HUGS**
At 5:41pm on July 7, 2012, John W. Jones said…
Darrell - I don't mind talking about Leonard at all. As a matter of fact I'm finding that talking about Leonard is very therapeutic. Fortunately, our families didn't have a problem with our relationship at all. Len retired from Verizon, but he was also a college professor at one time. He received his doctorate from an Ivy league school; then later he taught there. I on the other hand attended a Big Ten school. We truly loved each other. He knew that I would give my life for his! This man never had a fist fight in his life. That's how gentle he was. He was born in Iowa. He read on a 12th grade level when he was in the 6th grade. They didn't have AP courses at that time, so he was somewhat isolated from the rest of the kids. I met him in Philadelphia 35 years ago. My mother (now deceased) loved him right from the start. They had similar experiences growing up on a farm. She was born in the south. Leonard defeated death in 2000 battling colon cancer. He actually "flat-lined" and came back to life. He lost his battle with bladder cancer last Saturday. He was a fighter though! **More to follow** Send me an email Darrell - didymous52@aol.com - - I think theres a size limitation on this site. I can write more in an email. So can you. If you don't feel comfortable doing that right now, I'll understand. I'm still a stranger after all. But, do stay in touch. This is VERY helpful to me. And, I hope for you also. **HUGS**
At 5:37pm on July 7, 2012, John W. Jones said…
Darrell - I don't mind talking about Leonard at all. As a matter of fact I'm finding that talking about Leonard is very therapuetic. Fourtunately, our families didn't have a problem with our relationship at all. Len retired from Verizon, but he was also a college professor at one time. He received his doctorate from an Ivy league school; then later he taught there. I on the other hand attended a Big Ten school. We truly loved each other. He knew that I would give my life for his! This man never had a fist fight in his life. That's how gentle he was. He was born in Iowa. He read on a 12th grade level when he was in the 6th grade. They didn't have AP courses at that time, so he was somewhat isolated from the rest of the kids. I met him in Philadelphia 35 years ago. My mother (now deceased) loved him right from the start. They had similar experiences growing up on a farm. She was born in the south. Leonard defeated death in 2000 battling colon cancer. He actually "flat-lined" and came back to life. He lost his battle with bladder cancer last Saturday. He was a fighter though! **More to follow** Send me an email Darrell - didymous52@aol.com - - I think theres a size limitation on this site. I can write more in an email. So can you. If you don't feel comfortable doing that right now, I'll understand. I'm still a stranger after all. But, do stay in touch. This is VERY helpful to me. And, I hope for you also. **HUGS**
At 10:21pm on July 6, 2012, John W. Jones said…

Hi Darrell: First, let me thank you for responding with your kind words.  Your Homer sounds like a great guy. A female friend of mine sent me an email with the following saying - "Don't cry because it's over; but smile because it happened!" Homer showed you what pure unconditional love is/was all about.  Hang on to that. No one can ever replace Homer.  I'm sure it will all get better in time. Don't rush it. Feel what you feel, when you feel it!  It's what I'm trying to do.  Know that you're not alone in dealing with what you're going through. I understand.  **HUGS**

At 10:26pm on July 5, 2012, John W. Jones said…
Hi Darrell - my heart goes out to you.  We all grieve differently. No one has the right to tell you how you should feel.  You feel, what you feel, and it's real!  I hasn't been a week since I lost my partner of 24 years. We had known each other for 35 years, and lived together for 24. He passed June 30, 2012, at 2:23 pm.  I was holding both of his hands when he slowly slipped away from me.  He lost his battle with bladder cancer. Sometimes it hurts so badly 'til I think I'm going to burst open!!  It's uncontrollable at times!  Such anguish I've never known!  No one should hurt this badly!!!  I just let it out, then I'm okay for awhile.  I go to his room and talk to him (this helps). I thank him for being a part of my life.  I also know what pure unconditional love feels like. The kind where you would give your life for his!  Knowing this also helps ease the pain a little.  I'm sending you a hug.  Close your eyes and you can feel it. Take care.
At 5:38pm on July 4, 2012, Richard Straughn said…

I know exactly how you feel.  We have a big new house we built here in NJ and then a year and a half ago we bought the condo in Florida.  In November we had the whole kitchen redone and all new appliances.  It came out beautiful.  He was so proud to see it completed.  We were to have gone back to the condo for a few weeks this month but I haven't got the proper papers from florida to proceed with probate.  They listed his as a resident of Florida and I don't have any rights there.  So I wait.  I can't touch any of his money until I have the probate papers.  Meantime, I'm robbing peter to pay paul.  Larry left me very well provided for but it somehow doesn't mean much without someone to share it with.  I would have lived in a tent with him in the woods.  I guess time will heal but some days it doesn't seem like there is enough time in the world to heal this pain.  Hang in there and at least we have beautiful memories.  More than some people have in a lifetime.  Stay well. 

At 5:32am on July 4, 2012, Richard Straughn said…

Sorry I haven't been on lately.  I  have been occupied with trying to get utilities etc. turned over into my name.  Some more prblems than others.  Since our last names were different I'm being treated like a new customer by some and have to put security deposits down.  Still don't have the amendment to the death certificate so I can't probade.  Our financial advisor has been great calling places for me and told me it was very personal for him because he made a promise to Larry a few years back that he would help walk me through this.  Just like Larry to be looking after me.  Me doing all this in the emotional state I'm in is like Larry walking in the kitchen and baking a cake from scratch.  Never happen. To have so much time on my hands I've been cleaning out my junk in the garage and the house.  We both have tons of shoes (both here and at the condo in Florida) and accessories to say nothing of the millions of pictures I've gone through.  I did scan a lot and created a memorial album for him on facebook which family and friends have appreciated. 

Last Sunday I lost two more friends and have funerals to attend later this weekend.  One at the same funeral home.  I too have  been still emotional but I'm on medication and that helps. Having lunch with my sister in law today to plan his unveiling ceremony.  He was Jewish.  She turned Roman Catholic when married and I'm an Episcopal priest.  No rabbi will come to the Christian cemetery so we are doing it ourselves.  I don't know if I can get through it but I'm gonna try. 

I haven't moved things around much because I have files and folders all over the dining room and kitchen tables.  The office is upstairs and I can't be running up and down each time I need a file.  I will try to be better friend on here.  I just was in such a bad place a few weeks ago, I gave up from lack of responses I guess.  Please forgive.  This grief is a many sided beast.  Love to all.

At 9:50am on April 22, 2012, jerry massey said…

Yes it is hard. Probably the hardest thing you will encounter.  We have to hang there for our own survival.  Here for you.

 
 
 

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